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12 days to go and feel like I can't handle work anymore

(24 Posts)
IHateYourCarpet Wed 04-Oct-17 17:04:16

Please someone, coach me through this!

I have 12 working days till I start maternity leave. Work is horrendous, I'm constantly stressed. Between that, my in laws being vile, my own family drama, trying to get the house sorted for the baby and DH's yet to be disclosed posting; I feel like I may actually explode. I just want to cry. I feel ready to lose it. I wake up every day thinking it's going to be better, and things just seem to get worse! And I know the stress isn't good for me, or the baby.

I'm half tempted to get signed off on Monday until my annual leave starts sad even though I really don't want to let anyone down.

Anyway. Please someone tell me I can do this. 12 days is NOTHING. But it just seems like Mount Everest at the moment.

mummabubs Wed 04-Oct-17 17:49:29

Sorry to hear this OP. I ended up being signed off with stress for the last 7 weeks before my maternity was due to begin- and I can assure you I'd have done it with "just" 12 days to go too, it's not worth the stress to you or baby at this stage x

mummabubs Wed 04-Oct-17 17:51:03

(I'm aware I haven't coached you through it at all, sorry!) However I know I tried to coach myself through most of being pregnant at work and in the end I realised there was no shame in saying it was too much for me and as much as I worried about letting people down I had to put myself and baby first for once x

ThomasRichard Wed 04-Oct-17 17:54:10

TBH OP I’d get signed off and start maternity leave early. It’s not unusual and you’re very close to your start date anyway.

Towards the end of my first pregnancy I went into wok one day, sat down at my desk, burst into tears and was sent home to see my doctor. I didn’t go back for 10 months blush

ThomasRichard Wed 04-Oct-17 17:55:59

Meant to say... You can’t know when setting your anticipated ML start date how you will actually feel and what you’ll be able to cope with later in your pregnancy. I had planned to leave at 37w but had pre-eclampsia, felt rubbish and only just made it past 34w.

IHateYourCarpet Wed 04-Oct-17 18:17:43

Thank you both.

I know that getting signed off is the sensible option. And I don't want to let it get to the point where it's got me so down I'm crying at my desk sad

I'm going to persevere until Friday and see how I feel over the weekend. I'm sure I can manage another 1.5 days.

IHateYourCarpet Wed 04-Oct-17 18:18:21

It's really nice to be able to actually SAY how I'm feeling as well. I'm sick of pretending everything is okay when it's not!

Bluerose27 Wed 04-Oct-17 18:23:59

Get signed off!!! You're not letting anyone down. You'll feel bad for about 30 seconds as you tell your boss and then.... Blissful relaxation!! Go to the doctor ASAP, you'll be so glad you did. And I guarantee nobody will thank you for staying longer or even notice when you're gone!

Expectingbsbunumber2 Wed 04-Oct-17 19:30:46

I ended up finishing 3 weeks early I was syr

Expectingbsbunumber2 Wed 04-Oct-17 19:31:10

Struggling. My boss was completely fine about it x

GlitterSparkles17 Wed 04-Oct-17 19:32:26

I left work early and I’m so happy I did, I couldn’t physically do it anymore and my boss was really understanding. Speak to your boss or just get signed off by a doctor, you will feel so much better

MiniAlphaBravo Wed 04-Oct-17 19:33:53

Go off sick. Your health is more important than work and they won't thank you for working when you feel like shit, they'll just expect it.
By the way I am usually the type who struggles in to work feeling like crap but so not Wirth it when heavily pregnant.

Marmite27 Wed 04-Oct-17 19:35:30

If you're over 36 weeks and phone in sick, I think they automatically start your maternity leave.

I think trying to get through this week and having a good think over the weekend as to wether you want to go in next week is a good idea. Make the decision while away from work where you may be more clear headed.

mummabubs Wed 04-Oct-17 20:06:31

Only if the reason for being signed off is pregnancy-related @Marmite27. If not it's 'normal' sick leave and then mat leave kicks in when it was originally planned. Mine was work-related stress and not to do with pregnancy they can't bring mat leave forward (even though my boss kept insisting I should say to the GP that it was pregnancy related but it definitely wasn't!!)

Lozmatoz Wed 04-Oct-17 21:11:36

Get signed off! Get out of there. You are more impart than work.

AmyB1986 Wed 04-Oct-17 22:19:45

Same as everyone else has said. Get signed off.
I had to admit defeat 7 days before I was due to start annual leave. BP had gone through the roof with the stress and pgp was killing me. Best thing I did.
You need to rest and be able to potter round at your own pace getting things sorted for your baby arriving.
No shame in saying enough is enough xx

SleepingStandingUp Wed 04-Oct-17 22:22:51

The only responsibility you have right now is to you and baby. If you can't do it, don't. Cry at your doc, get signed off. You might have to start maternity leave early but honestly its not worth the stress

4evernamechanging Wed 04-Oct-17 22:25:39

There will be no medal for staying! Work will manage without you in 12 days so I'm sure they'll be just fine now.. get signed off!

pomadas87 Thu 05-Oct-17 10:55:37

I really sympathise OP - I finish for mat leave on 20 Oct and I am counting down the hours. Work want me to do so much extra before I finish as they haven't found cover yet and the stress is unbearable.

My advice is either get signed off from next week - they will of course survive! - or just focus on getting through each day, one by one. I'm doing the latter!

flowers for you

Oldschool41 Fri 06-Oct-17 08:25:58

I have 6 weeks to go until Al starts then maternity but my doctor signed me off yesterday due to chest infection and the nature of my job. My advice is do not struggle make time to rest. No job is worth you and baby struggling with. 😜

IHateYourCarpet Mon 09-Oct-17 12:35:51

Thank you all for your support.

I've taken today off sick, thankfully it won't trigger my maternity leave early, thinking an extra day of rest may make it bearable. Had a few work calls already (that I've ignored)... I just can't do it. I'm finishing this Friday and moving my annual leave forward. I can't believe I can't have a sick day without being disturbed.

Oldschool41 Mon 09-Oct-17 12:45:43

If your off sick they are not suppose to hassle you. They can phone to see how you are but not to talk about work load. I

IHateYourCarpet Mon 09-Oct-17 13:22:21

Oh it's 100% going to be work related. I don't think any of them particularly care how I am, more how my absence inconveniences them. As soon as I leave I'm tempted to block the number blush or I can see myself still getting calls on maternity leave.

Oldschool41 Mon 09-Oct-17 13:33:44

My advice would keep a log and report it as they are not suppose to hassle you under the health and safety act. Yours Nd babies health is suppose to come first. 😉

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