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31w & feeling down about weight

(11 Posts)
meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 10:56:50

Also feeling hormonal again these past few weeks which is no doubt not helping.

But I'm just feeling sad and frustrated about weight gain. Before I got pregnant I had about 3 stone to lose, having lost 3 (albeit put it back on and lost it a few times over the past couple of years). I was making headway with my weight for once not through fad dieting. Just cooking from scratch / eating better and it was coming off slowly but surely.

I had wanted to lose the weight prior to getting pregnant but it didn't happen that way and we are where we are. So I started at 13.11 with a BMI of 32.

For my BMI I should have gained between 11-20lbs. But I'm already at 23. And I can't stop eating. I'm a vegetarian and used to eat very healthily but in pregnancy food aversions have meant I'm eating bland carby foods all the time like pasta and potato.

I have 9 weeks left to go and so it stands to reason I'll obviously be gaining more weight, even if I ate well at this stage due to it being the third trimester.

I'm dreading how I'm going to feel afterwards. I've actually been enjoying my bump and wearing tight clothes I wouldn't have dreamed of wearing in the past 10 years. When baby is here I know my stomach area which is the bit I'm most self conscious about will be a lot worse.

I'm trying to tell myself it's pointless dwelling on my pre-pregnancy weight as I wasn't happy then either and there's little I can do about it now, but still I'm scared to soon be heavier than I've ever been before (even if it is only for a few weeks).

I'm trying to eat better but I'm anaemic so constipated, feel sick today and always shattered. Always hungry but never know what I want to eat. Just frustrated with it.

Not sure what the point of this is, just wondering if anyone else is feeling the same?

meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 10:57:06

Sorry that was so long!! hmm

meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 16:40:39

Bump ... Still hungry, still meh sad

HeyJupiter Tue 19-Sep-17 17:01:44

Just a post to say I totally empathise! We are weight buddies as my BMI was 32 at booking in and I've put on 23lb too (I'm 31+2w pregnant today.) I've been stressing in the same way but all I'll say is given your weight loss history (having lost and gained in the past) you clearly know how to lose weight when it's needed and there's no reason why you can't do that again after the birth when it's safe to. For now you just need to keep nourishing your baby as best you can.

If it's any help my sister gained three stone during pregnancy and lost a stone of that before even leaving the hospital!

Good luck smile Enjoy your lovely baby when they come.

sleepseeker99 Tue 19-Sep-17 17:02:10

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so blue

Sorry to hear you're feeling so blue xxxx

31 weeks here with DC2 and anxious about weight gain. I am trying to focus on the baby and not the expanding waist line and worry about the aftermath but it is hard. I try to focus on the fact that everyone has their own body hang ups regardless of size and I shouldn't allow mine to take away from this special time.

I have gained more than the average- though I'm not going to put stats on here as I don't think it's helpful to compare ourselves. There will be women larger and smaller than you who have similar feelings. Is there anyone in RL you can talk to about this? I find talking with DH helps. Talking to friends has been largely unhelpful as most haven't been pregnant and simply say ooo but you can lose it after- not very uplifting! DH's responses of, 'you're beautiful whatever your size' and similar, are much better received smile

Remember that you are creating a new life and that is AMAZING! So when you can't look at a salad and need a toastie/other carb-laden dinner try not to beat yourself up about it xxxxx

Lozmatoz Tue 19-Sep-17 17:03:30

I think it's just something that you need to get your head around. You are right you need to put on weight as you're pregnant but not through eating badly. Can your partner do some of the cooking? You could try planning and prepping, I know it's hard though when you are exhausted all the time. You need healthy things that you can just grab and eat.

I found breastfeeding the best way to lose weight after the baby arrives. You definitely don't want to lose it too quickly afterwards though. Also walking up and down pushing a pram all the time helps! Good luck!

meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 17:14:01

@HeyJupiter Thanks for your post! It's good to know I'm not alone, I know in reality it's good we're keeping an eye on it and conscious, as you say the main thing is baby will be here soon. And they're getting everything they need.

It's hard not to feel deflated at times though! I am going to focus on what's ahead and stop dwelling on things. I hope the next few weeks go well for you & you're enjoying your pregnancy X

meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 17:18:56

@sleepseeker99 you're spot on. And thank you for your post. I know you're right, it's all really unimportant in the grand scheme of things and what our bodies are doing is absolutely mind boggling. My DH has been fantastic in fairness and he seems to fancy me more if anything, he never sees what I am talking about. I do talk to him about it but he doesn't get it fully. I've found the same with friends and I'm the only person who has struggled with my weight in the family so feel DH is the best person to speak to.

Also you're right, I shouldn't have posted stats and I hope that my post isn't insensitive to anyone else reading! They're pretty irrelevant and normally I strongly believe that but I've been feeling so caught up in them, think I need to stop dwelling on measurements and just think about the task at hand!

Thank you xxx

meltingmarshmallows Tue 19-Sep-17 17:23:15

@Lozmatoz I haven't gained weight through eating badly for the most part. It was pretty steady / on track until the middle of the second trimester. That's partially when I'm beating myself up too I think, it felt very in hand and then I had some rapid weight gain even whilst eating well and it's just gone downhill since. Appetite is vastly increased. And I feel as though I've lost control which is frustrating, but I can't do much to lose the extra I've gained now and agree nutrition for the baby is paramount so I'm not going to do anything like try and lose weight now.

I'm aware that currently I'm not eating as well as I could be, as I'm having a lot of food aversions and feeling generally rubbish. I'm really hoping this will pass, as it's hard not to reach for carbs etc.

DH has been great with doing a lot of the cooking.

I'm planning on breastfeeding so hoping that helps. Good point about the pram too. Thank you

sleepseeker99 Tue 19-Sep-17 17:30:55

Sorry I didn't mean to criticise you putting stats. It's not insensitive. I just think, like you've said, you need to try to not focus on them. Glad to hear you can talk to your DH and he is so supportive smile xxx

Mum2oneds Tue 19-Sep-17 17:44:53

I'm 16 weeks and gained a bloody stone lol. Dunno how as honestly don't snack anymore, gone off it. Just the three meals aday.. I lost 3 stone and managed to keep off prior to pregnancy.. It did flutter by a lb or two but always kept it average. I worry I'll gain so much I won't lose it. With DS 12 yrs ago I put on 5 stone.. I don't want that again.
I moan to dp all the time and he is so good. He says he don't care I could be the size of an elephant he wouldn't care. But I do!

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