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You know you're due when...

(20 Posts)
SellMySoulForSomeSleep Wed 16-Aug-17 12:23:42

Every phone call I make to my DH starts with "I'm not in labour"

Cleaning is my new obsession

I'm actually thinking about sex for the first time in months.

SellMySoulForSomeSleep Wed 16-Aug-17 12:24:57

I apologise for the lack of full stops. My paragraphs don't seem to work on the app. confused

mistletoeprickles Wed 16-Aug-17 16:50:58

I've had my baby now but;

DP phoned me on average of once an hour.

I gave up wearing clothes and stuck to pj's.

We're on first name terms with the local delivero guy.

onemoremummy Wed 16-Aug-17 18:38:06

The baby doesn't come 😬

SellMySoulForSomeSleep Wed 16-Aug-17 23:16:16

It feels like it's never going to come PP. sad

CrowOnTheBroom Thu 17-Aug-17 10:33:14

.... the only shoes that fit are slippers or flip flops.

CaptWentworth Thu 17-Aug-17 10:37:58

You have to as DH to help you roll over in the night.

You contemplate taking a pillow into the bathroom so you can nap and pee at the same time.

CaptWentworth Thu 17-Aug-17 10:38:08

*ask

Cupcakegirl13 Thu 17-Aug-17 10:39:12

You Pee every time you move

ZigAZigAhh Thu 17-Aug-17 10:55:45

You can't sigh, moan or frown without sending DH or DM into a panic...

The productive cleaning and preparing phase you had a week ago has well and truly gone and you struggle to move from the couch (unless it's to the toilet or the fridge)...

You idly think about eating lots of pineapple and curry, drinking raspberry leaf tea, going on long walks, scrubbing the kitchen floor and having sex - then realise that you really can't be bothered doing any of it...

thatorchidmoment Thu 17-Aug-17 14:45:08

The only thing scarier than pushing the baby out of your fanjo is not pushing the baby out of your fanjo. Maybe you are doomed to be pregnant FOREVER.

You drop something on the floor and it stays there for about a week. Bending down is just not worth it any more.

You give into the spicy food cravings. Six hours, no sleep, and much antacid later, you regret it with all your heart and soul. The next time you do it all over again.

Almost 38 weeks here... with number 4. I know I'm mad.

IamDBCooper Thu 17-Aug-17 15:44:10

I spent the last month of my last pregnancy laying in bed as it was the only way I could be comfortable. Baby was huge and filled every mm of space in my torso haha

TheLegendOfBeans Thu 17-Aug-17 15:51:34

I'm only 31 weeks and I feel like all of the above already!

SellMySoulForSomeSleep Thu 17-Aug-17 18:44:48

Love these!

Theveryhungrybutterfly Thu 17-Aug-17 20:46:45

You're irrationally angry with anyone who actually has had their baby

KarmaNoMore Thu 17-Aug-17 21:25:17

I found myself vacuum cleaning the front garden. I didn't even realise the absurdity of what I was doing until my neighbour asked when the baby was due.

It seemed such a natural thing to do...

2furbabies Fri 18-Aug-17 07:43:56

@KarmaNoMore
Omg hahahahaha that's absolutely brilliant 😂😂😂

SellMySoulForSomeSleep Fri 18-Aug-17 23:32:55

Karma that is amazing. grin

SellMySoulForSomeSleep Fri 18-Aug-17 23:32:58

Karma that is amazing. grin

chelle85 Sat 19-Aug-17 09:27:00

Karma I vacuum the back garden but in my defence I have astroturf....my DH still looks at me like a crazy lady when I do it though

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