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Parents have been telling my family I'm expecting

(17 Posts)
Firstpotato Sun 28-May-17 10:50:49

I don't know if I'm over reacting but I told my parents I'm pregnant and they have been telling other family members before I've had the chance to. I didn't think I would have had to ask them to keep it to themselves. It's taken away from me telling aunts and uncles that I'm close to. I made the mistake of telling my parents and then going away for work. In that time, they have told most of the family. I didn't know they had and I went to my aunts to tell her. Her reaction told me she already knew and it took away from me telling her. Now I don't know who knows but is waiting for me to tell them. I'd rather them just say instead of acting fake surprised angry

mysecret321 Sun 28-May-17 11:08:21

I'd be p****d off if I were you tbh. My mum knows but she would never tell anyone and is waiting for me to tell people (I had two mcs maybe that's different) I'd speak to them and explain don't think they had bad intentions they were probably simply too excited to keep the news to themselves x

pinkyredrose Sun 28-May-17 11:09:59

In the nicest possible way, does it really matter?

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

daisygirlmac Sun 28-May-17 11:11:10

I would be really annoyed as well. I'm sure they are just excited but it isn't their news, it's yours. My mum actually told me I was being annoying because I kept saying don't tell anyone, nothing on Facebook etc and she was dying to tell people but I thought if I haven't explicitly said what I want to happen then I can really complain. I do think your parents need to be told to stop though! And definitely make sure they know it is for you and your partner to announce the birth. Congratulations flowers

Firstpotato Sun 28-May-17 11:21:25

My mums family have called or messaged saying they have heard and sent congratulations. Which I'm ok with. I've since asked my mum not to. Felt like a fool telling my aunt and having a fake congratulations and preferred her to say she knew. It's my first pregnancy and I would like to make the most of this experience. I have 4 siblings. Pretty sure my parents have had their time.

Squishedstrawberry4 Sun 28-May-17 11:27:52

Did you ask your mum not to say anything to anyone?

I delayed telling my parents second time round after they blabbed before I felt ready first time round

C0RAL Sun 28-May-17 11:29:59

I'd be annoyed too. But at least now you know not to trust her with any information in the future.

SoupDragon Sun 28-May-17 11:32:53

As you didn't tell your mother not to tell anyone because you wanted to tell them yourself, it's really down to you.

Congratulations though!

glastogal Sun 28-May-17 12:19:11

We asked the grandparents to keep it to themselves until we had the 12 week scan but then let them off the leash.. I guess it's different for me as I'm not really close with my uncle's and aunts so it was nice to let the grandparents tell their siblings, they're excited!! Of course it is their news too!!

Sparklyuggs Sun 28-May-17 12:20:15

I'd be upset. I told my parents at 5 weeks (hyperemesis) and I had to tell my Dad several times that he couldn't tell people until I'd had my scan. Congratulations!

FoxesSitOnBoxes Sun 28-May-17 12:26:24

I think you probably should have asked them not to tell. It wouldn't have occured to me to individually ring up all my aunts and uncles etc to tell them I was pregnant. I just don't think it's a particularly important life event for less closely related relatives so I'm not sure what would be gained from telling them all individually.
I can only think that you might want to tell them yourself if they were likely to either be really excited by the news/annoyed if they didn't hear from you directly but (certainly in my family!) it just isnt that big a deal

Rockaby Sun 28-May-17 12:35:06

This wouldn't bother me in the slightest, unless I'd maybe told someone before my scan and specifically told them not to tell anyone. Other than that, I couldn't summon a single fuck to give tbh grin.

I also agree with pp that I wouldn't think to call my aunts and uncles up to tell them I was pregnant either. The only people we took the effort to inform in person / on the phone were our parents and a friend who I was going to be bridesmaid for while pregnant so had to let her know. My cousins have all done the same when they've had babies; they've told their parents, who have told my dad, who has told me.

What does it really matter, in the grand scheme of things? Really worth getting worked up about smile.

Rockaby Sun 28-May-17 12:45:43

That should have said "Really not worth getting worked up about"!

Firstpotato Sun 28-May-17 16:07:48

Thanks guys.
1. I should have said not to tell anyone.

Just a bit strange to think other people know but are waiting for me to tell them. confused

Scaredycat2016 Sun 28-May-17 16:22:02

I feel your frustration on this. I'm 31 weeks now and have told very few people myself and haven't put a thing on Facebook....my mother however seems to have hired some sort of plane with a message, once I was 12 weeks virtually everyone knew....the post woman, the Avon lady, everyone in our village.....
I'm a really private person and it really grates me! X

Dede124 Sun 28-May-17 16:42:44

My cousin did the same thing she told everyone in my family before I got chance to and I was only about 7/8 weeks. But she didn't share the news in a positive way she was jealous because she wanted to have a baby first and was making out to everyone I'm stupid for getting pregnant and found out she had said some horrible things. I was so angry I'm still not speaking to her or some people in my family as they pretended not to know and didn't even say congrats... so I know how you feel it's not nice when you want to tell people your news yourself!

Chamonix1 Sun 28-May-17 16:45:18

I told my mum and asked her told her not to tell anyone as I would be.
I knew if I didn't say it, she'd be on the phone telling everyone or slipping up.
Remember for baby #2!

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