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20 week scan in few weeks. Nervous and excited.

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SpwJd Sun 23-Apr-17 16:28:54

I am on the count down to our 20 week scan. 4 weeks and counting. It goes without saying that above all else we want a healthy happy baby.
I currently have two boys whom are our world and I'm finding everyone asking about what sex I'd prefer. (" bet your love a girl / are you hoping for a girl / did you try for a girl ? Are you having this one to try for a girl !!" Etc etc.
Myself and my husband have always said we wanted a larger than average family. 3 or 4 ideally. Thing is now I'm pregnant this time it feels that this may well be our last so I guess the pressure for us to be having a girl is actually on.
I've always imagined I would have a girl and having my second boy I was a little shocked but guess at the time thought that as we planned a big family perhaps a girl would happen later on.
Now that the scan is approaching I'm finding that I'm growing anxious.
Obviously I will love my child what ever the out come but can't help but feel the pull to wanting it to be a girl.
Literally everyone that I know that's having a baby this year is having a girl and I'm already considering how I'm going to feel if I find it's another boy when I'm also amongst all the girls.
As I said we didnt try for this child just to get a girl but the more I think about it I'd love to have a girl to add another dimension to our family.

I guess I'm just wondering if I'm normal in feeling like I do.
I already feel guilty thinking that if I find out it is a boy that I may be disappointed.
I know we are so so SO lucky to be expecting another baby. Honestly i do. I know people close to the family that have struggled to conceive so I know that we are extremely lucky but that said I still can't help these thoughts popping in my head - what if I never have a little girl. What if I don't ever have a relation ship with a daughter like I have wth my mum.

Anyone else had similar feelings ?
How did you manage your expectations/surprise /disappointment ?
Thank you.

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