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Pregnancy

Gestational Diabetes Guilt & Shame

15 replies

Flappergirl86 · 19/04/2017 11:23

I had my GTT test yesterday and got a call this morning informing me that I tested positive for gestational diabetes on both the before and after blood tests. My BMI is 30.5 and my late dad had diabetes although his was lifestyle induced. I feel so guilty that I've put my baby at risk because I can't put down the chocolate bars. I'm embarrassed to tell people because they'll be thinking about how unsurprising it is given that I don't do exercise or eat particularly well.

I know all kinds of women are affected by GD and it's not down to weight for everyone but it obvs is for me.

Will I feel better about this or do I have 3 months of grief ahead of me until she is hopefully born healthy?

I am also feeling sorry for myself because I wanted a waterbirth with minimal medical intervention and now I'm looking down the barrel of a super clinical drip needing hourly blood tests requiring stressful labour. Obviously I'm gonna do whatever is in baby's best interests after this reality check and I'm grateful that I'm privileged enough to have the care she needs on my doorstep but it doesn't stop me feeling absolutely devastated and ashamed.

How have other GD sufferers coped with the news?

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Lucinda15 · 19/04/2017 19:27

This was me 3 weeks ago when I was first told I had GD. I totally understand the guilt and shame, I felt it too and was so sad. I admit I wallowed in it for a day or so, but then decided to just be as proactive as I could. I did a bit of reading up on a really good website,

www.gestationaldiabetes.co.uk/

which taught me a lot and had some excellent advice and tips around diet, including food menus/recipes. But dnt be alarmed, a lot of it is healthy eating but more low GI. I'm finding it meals quite easy, with little change to normal but snacks are a bit harder! But so far I'm managing ok with diet alone and haven't needed insulin/metformin yet.

I've been a bit sad about labour/post natal care being a bit different than I had hoped for but i realised there was nothing I could do about it, just had to accept it and do what I could to help my situation (i.e. Do my best to control my blood sugars). And it really hasn't been too hard so far. Plus, I'm getting lots of extra scans and appointments so feel I'm being taken really good care of.

Please don't beat urself up. see the website for some info and also join the fb group (the website will direct u) there are lots of ladies on there and some great support if u have any questions or need advice. It will be ok, and u shouldn't be ashamed at all.

Sending a hug x

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HabbyHadno · 19/04/2017 19:32

Hello!

I found out I have GD last week after my GTT and had my first clinic appointment today where I was given a blood glucose monitor. The midwife was lovely and said that although I can't use the birth centre I can still have a water birth and hopefully avoid an induction IF I keep my levels low through diet for the next three months.

It's a bit scary, but I feel much better after talking to her today. I was petrified of a horrendous birth experience before.

Not looking forward to the finger pricking though. I'm putting off starting until tomorrow morning.

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Lucinda15 · 19/04/2017 19:36

Here is a link to my initial 'feeling-shame-and-guilt-and-how-the-F-do-i-deal-with-this' post 😂 Some good replies on there about diet and stuff.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2891956-Gestational-diabetes-Personal-experiences-menu-tips-to-avoid-me-going-nuts-asking-dr-Google

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Flappergirl86 · 19/04/2017 20:35

Thank you so much for replying, it's such a relief to hear that all is not lost from people who've been through the same thing. That previous thread is really useful as well, wish I'd seen it earlier today when I was balling my eyes out on my bed.

Definitely going to look for a silver lining in all this with the 'health kick' element.

Xx

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HabbyHadno · 20/04/2017 20:33

I joined the FB group today. Thanks for the suggestion.

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haveacupoftea · 21/04/2017 00:17

I was diagnosed with GD 10 weeks ago. Firstly drop the guilt, you get it because of your placenta messing with your insulin production, not because you ate too much chocolate.

Secondly, if you need medication don't stress, you can do all the right things and still need insulin. It's your body that's the problem especially in cases of high fasting numbers.

Thirdly, some of the women on that Facebook group are deranged so exercise caution. Your NHS dietician will give you guidance on what to eat and when to test and I suggest you stick to their guidance. The last thing you need is hysterical messages on Facebook because you ate one weetabix and didn't test your bloods after 15 minutes. Some carbs are necessary to keep your bloods stable and your body healthy.

Finally, it's fucking shit being unable to comfort yourself in the third trimester with yummy food whilst it seems everyone on your ante natal group is eating full bags of mini eggs and starburst. But you'll get through it - it won't last forever. And it definitely helps keep the weight gain down.

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GinSwigmore · 21/04/2017 00:35

Hello OP
To be honest I didn't think to feel guilty or ashamed which probably makes me a worse mum than you! It didn't occur to me. I did take it seriously though and got it under control by low carbing and exercise. I was not diagnosed until third trimester.
My DC however was not as large as I was expecting (7lb 7 iirc).
But DC did need observing first few days (I was expecting this, not trying to worry you). Blood sugars were low a couple of times and needed supplementing (was bf but waiting for milk to come in).
Anyway, a typical day for me was:
1 egg, bacon, mushrooms, 1 slice wholemeal toast
Almond nuts to snack on
Tuna salad with added nuts, cheese cubes and apple
Yoghurt
Piece of meat/fish, broccoli, brown rice/quinoa/or couple of potatoes
I found that my bloods were not too high if I had lots of protein eg spag carbonara still doable
Drank a lot of water with lemon in. Had some diet coke when needed sugar pang. Also on days where I was struggling (having cut out pure juice, jam, cakes, chocolate, white bread) a handful of peanut m+ms did the trick. Nuts were my friend.
I was lucky not to have to medicate/inject: simply did blood readings pre and post with the stored data device a and kept appts with the diabetes consultant.
Shamrock

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GinSwigmore · 21/04/2017 00:44

^ I am fat and a sugar addict but did not have GD with 1+2, so with 3 was just Oh, that's new. Blood pricking becomes second nature. Choosing things to eat is not as hard as it first appears. But do eat well/decent portions as you are still growing a baby (mine is fine BTW). Low carbing reminded me a bit of slimmers world red day/green day. Opting for small amount of brown rather than white bread/rice/pasta was boring but okay. I did not avoid anything other than the items in my first post but bulked up where I could.

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GinSwigmore · 21/04/2017 00:48

Oh and dc3 was a completely natural birth albeit they let me go to nearly 42 weeks Confused as bloods maintained and DC measuring fine.
That birth was the only natural nonintervention one. (it was also the worst of my three but that's another thread entirely Wink).

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Kintan · 21/04/2017 16:10

The main thing to do is to work out what foods work for you. The NHS dietary advice (oats, wholemeal bread etc) sent my blood sugars soaring. I found I could keep my reading within the required range by eating a mostly paleo style diet. I could even get away with ice cream - it was gluten that sent my blood sugar high. Everyone is different, so if the NHS diet doesn't work, try a few other things before accepting the metformin or insulin, but if you do have to go on them don't feel bad, it's just a temporary condition!

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HabbyHadno · 21/04/2017 22:05

I've had a total mare today. My levels have been awful and I'm only on day two. I thought I'd tried really hard too. I feel really disheartened.

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Flappergirl86 · 22/04/2017 11:44

This is all so reassuring. It's so good to hear from people who've been/are going through it and not just reading nhs guidelines which are a bit scare mongery, so I've concluded. The last few days have been mental, I've been so depressed about it, yesterday (2nd day of pricking) my levels were through the roof including my fasting reading and so far today they've all been comfortably under. But I have been behaving super well with food since finding out so it's hard to draw correlations.

Habby I know how you feel, I was mortified yesterday but it can change dramatically by the looks of things so hope you do ok today. I think we must have started pricking at the same time.

Thanks for helping my guilt subside ladies. Xx

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Lucinda15 · 22/04/2017 17:39

I'm struggling with my fasting readings too, it's really frustrating. I did read that they are notoriously hard to control due to cortisol release overnight (or something? I won't pretend to understand or remember very well 😂) and someone mentioned something about sugars being released into the blood when u haven't eaten for a while....

Anyway. I found an evening or bedtime snack really helped. I often went with a slow release option; granary toast with Philadelphia. Deffo worked initially, but beginning to see my fasting tests rise even with the bedtime snack! It's really hard. Trial and error a lot of this I think! X

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HabbyHadno · 22/04/2017 18:30

I've been much better today, which included a lunch at Prezzo (steak salad). It's all a learning curve I guess. Shame it's fallen the week before I go on holiday, my birthday night out next weekend and then a hen do!

I've found the FB group SO useful, I've just signed up for membership so I can get some recipes for evening meals.

Glad you're feeling better Flapper, I think we must have started at the same time. Smile

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haveacupoftea · 22/04/2017 19:30

Lucinda there's really nothing you can do about the morning fasting levels except start taking bedtime insulin. Just remember insulin won't harm your baby, but high blood sugars might so if you need treatment there's no call to panic.

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