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how to explain pregnancy/new sibling to a child

(14 Posts)
Castleonacloud Mon 10-Apr-17 12:36:49

I started another thread under a similar name, but thought I'd put here for more traffic.

I'm looking for ways/books/what to say to a 5yr old to explain a new sibling/pregnancy.

Me and DH want to tell DS before anyone else as we think its important he finds out from us not anyone else. I'm around 12 weeks and have scan soon, so will tell him after that. It may be early, but I cant keep it from him any longer as others will know and I'm already starting to show so won't be able to keep it secret for much longer...

Any ideas welcome...

SeatOfMyPants Mon 10-Apr-17 12:48:01

In same situation (DS is 4, but 5 in June).

All the books I can find seem to be aimed at younger children and toddlers. I guess our age gap isn't in vogue!

DS is interested in bodies and how they work anyway and whilst I am not going the full sex ed I do want to help him understand what's happening, as I think he's going to be interested in the pregnancy.

Also want to reassure him - he's been an only (as well as only grandchild on both sides) for so long, I'm am wondering how easy he is going to find the idea...

Anyway, scan is tomorrow so I hope I still have to be concerned about all of this in 24 hours. A bit nervous....

Castleonacloud Mon 10-Apr-17 13:37:05

Your situation is so similar to mine. Scan is Thurs and am quite nervous (prev miscarriages).

Like you all books I've seen have been a bit young and did think about a t-shirt with big brother on it, but not sure if its a bit premature..will keep looking/thinking...

SeatOfMyPants Mon 10-Apr-17 14:42:42

Yes, me too, sadly. It's crap isn't it. Mind you, with DS I went in blithely unaware/confident and ended up with high risk for Downs etc. Ended up with CVS. All very well in the end. Thought that was bad until we discovered a MMC in September at first scan. Threshold now lowered on what to expect from scan.

10storeylovesong Mon 10-Apr-17 15:51:30

My ds was 4 in Feb and we're due 1st Oct. We showed him a scan photo and told him that it was a baby that was in mum's belly and that we were hoping very much that it would carry on growing and join us as a baby towards the end of the year. We then changed the subject. He comes to us with questions every now and again but seems to be quite matter of fact about it. We'll talk about it more after 20 week scan as we're going to find out scan so can get him used to idea.

228agreenend Mon 10-Apr-17 15:58:10

Can you buy books such as this Topsy and Tim book'to,explain the situation?

Have you other friends who,are pregnant or have a baby you can relate to.

incyspider Mon 10-Apr-17 17:46:08

After my 1st scan I'm planning on getting this book as my girls 6 and 4 are really into biology too.
What's Inside Your Tummy, Mummy?

vfoster Mon 10-Apr-17 19:08:07

We told my daughter on Christmas Eve. We bought a t shirt, doll and book and wrapped them under the tree. When our parents and siblings were around during the evening we said we would allow our daughter to open a few gifts and then told her (and our families) it was from her little brother or sister in mummy's tummy. Families were happy but my daughter didn't really care....though she did love the doll!
The baby is due in July and my daughter will be 4 in August so she's a little younger. I got her a book called 'There's a House Inside My Mummy' and she loves it. She chooses it most nights. It's possibly much more suited to a three year old, think we were lucky there were so many books aimed at her age!
We also get her little things from the baby. For Valentines Day we bought her Trolls on DVD and said it was from the baby as it would love her so much. She loved it and when she watches the film she says 'this is from my baby'.
She loves to talk to the baby and tells us what the baby says to her...the baby usually wants whatever she wants surprisingly!

LoveDeathPrizes Mon 10-Apr-17 19:10:26

I think you'd get away with There's a House inside my Mummy. It was our favourite.

PTphonehome Mon 10-Apr-17 19:44:31

I'm currently worrying about this too but my ds is 9 and I worry about telling him too early as it's a long time to wait from 12 weeks.
I'm thinking will keep it quiet until 16 weeks and have a gender scan then tell him.
I'm stressing about it so much.

Castleonacloud Mon 10-Apr-17 22:05:42

I was going to wait but I know somebody would let slip, and my DS isn't daft, he's very switched on and will notice things soon.... We want him to hear from us, so has to be earlier than we hoped

Castleonacloud Tue 11-Apr-17 12:23:23

Seat - hope your scan goes ok xx

SeatOfMyPants Wed 12-Apr-17 12:40:35

Thanks Castle for thinking of me. Yes, it went ok. There's still a baby there, which is a start. We came out high-ish risk for Downs (I'm 38) so we were given the option for the Harmony Test and have taken it. Results in 2 weeks. So feel a bit in limbo (whilst at the same time noting the stats are actually on my side)....

So will tell DS when the results are back and hopefully all is fine.

But then I'm thinking we might get a gender scan done at 16 weeks or so (my next scan I'll be actually 22 +) so then we'll be able to introduce the baby and the sex, rather than DS becoming attached to one or the other.

Thanks to those with suggestions! Will look into it and come back if I have any!!

Best of luck with everything on the scan Castle! Hope all goes well.

Castleonacloud Wed 19-Apr-17 20:33:04

Sorry I've not replied sooner. I'm glad things went ok with your scan,even if the risk was slightly high. Hope everything works out the way you want it to...

We got the what's in your tummy mummy book and its gone down well x

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