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Pregnancy

Sharing maternity/ paternity leave

7 replies

ICESTAR · 08/04/2017 09:19

Hi there. I'm not pregnant yet but will be ttc in the summer after a big hol and other things that are planned. My dp has said ge would like to share the leave. So if I did six months, then he would do the other six months. I feel really happy that he wants to share in this. We both work for the nhs and in the same department so this is doable. What I would like to know is has anyone else done this and what was your experience of it? How did you work it out? Who did which half? Did you resent giving up the rest of your time with your baby or were you happy to go back to work please? I just wondered what it's like in real life rather than just talking about it. Hope I'm okay to post in this part not being pregnant. Also I don't know how significant this is but we are on them same wage pretty much.

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Notyetthere · 08/04/2017 09:45

Apparently the take up of SPL has been very successful with more dad's than anticipated taking it.

I'm 28 weeks today so have not started yet. Dh and I are also using SPL where he will take the 2nd lot of 6 months. I don't feel like I will be missing out, baby will be with its father which I actually think is a beautiful thing. I already know he will be a brilliant parent having observed him with dnephew.

I am not very maternal and I love my job so 6 months is plenty enough for me.

I most likely will miss out on first crawl and probably first walk but at least dad will be there to enjoy these firsts and not the nursery.

Good luck.

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BellyBean · 08/04/2017 10:00

Makes sense for you to do the first stint, as you'll be recovering physically. Also if you're planning on breastfeeding.

I found the second half is the fun half though!

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ICESTAR · 08/04/2017 13:33

Thanks so much for the replies. Yes it does make sense for me the do the first. Especially going through the pregnancy and labour, it will only be fair haha! I'm really happy that he wants to be there so much for our baby when we do ttc. Glad it's quite a success. More men should do it. Ee had one guy at our work do it as well. He loved it and has a very strong bond with his son. X

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AbbeyRoadCrossing · 08/04/2017 13:51

We did 6 months each also. I'm higher paid so it made sense for DH to do the unpaid bit and also for my physical recovery (I think there is a few weeks compulsory leave after the birth anyhow) made sense for me to do the first stint.
You can split it however you like though, it hasn't got to be 6 each so if when baby is here you both change your minds I think you give 8 weeks notice to chance the time you are taking.

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TheGrumpySquirrel · 08/04/2017 14:57

I'm 5 weeks pregnant and also planning on doing this (I'll be off from start of Dec 2017 to start June 2018). Then DH will take the next 26 weeks - his work say they pay SPL at 100% for 26 weeks but am I right in thinking that won't cover his half as it will be the second 26 weeks? Or how does that work? Obviously his work are not paying me for the first half, my own work pay 26 weeks mat leave or SPL at full pay.

Then I think I'm going to use my saved up annual leave so that we can take a 4 week family holiday together in the summer after I have returned to work (August is v quiet in my industry anyway).

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AbbeyRoadCrossing · 08/04/2017 15:09

Sounds like between you you'll get a year full pay between you that's amazing!
Any occupational pay it'll be set out in his contract or staff handbook or he can ask his HR. It's up to the company what they give as extra and any conotions attached.

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Twinnypops · 08/04/2017 16:44

I did 7 months and now DH is doing his 5 month stretch. So far it's gone really well, and I'm glad that they'll have all that time with their Dad.

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