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Second child

(12 Posts)
Matchstickbox Wed 22-Mar-17 15:52:02

I'm pregnant with my second child. Only 6w so early days.

I really wanted a second and was lucky it happened quickly Dd is 20m.

Now a few days after a bfp I'm upset because I feel like it's going to ruin Dds life. I was so happy and now I'm just upset and worried.
If anything happens and I lost it I know I'd be devastated.

Is that normal? I've been so lucky and I'm just being pathetic about it.

GemSingleton Wed 22-Mar-17 16:30:30

It's probably your hormones all taking over. Your body is going through a huge change again and there's a lot going on.
When things settle down again you'll probably feel much better. Just because you have 2 babies doesn't mean 1 will be pushed out. DD will probably be thrilled to have a new little playmate! Don't stress, when everything settles down you'll feel better again

indigo13 Wed 22-Mar-17 16:48:55

Its normal to feel this way, but always remember, you're giving your daughter a gift more precious than anything else you could ever give her

Matchstickbox Wed 22-Mar-17 19:20:36

It's gotta be hormones.
I was excited all the while period was late then urg.
I'm so scared about coping with two.
Then I remind myself loads of people do this.

Flowerydems Wed 22-Mar-17 19:23:18

13 months between mine and they don't know life without each other. It's just the hormones, put your feet up and congratulations

MieMoosMummy Thu 23-Mar-17 07:47:22

I'm kind of in the same boat here! DD is 21 months and I've not long had my BFP. I know she is going to make a wonderful big sister but I know things will have to change. At the moment we bed share and there's only just enough room for the three of us, let alone when I start getting bumpy sad

MargaretCabbage Thu 23-Mar-17 07:51:46

I have a small age gap and I had the same thoughts, especially in late pregnancy when I wasn't able to be as much fun. I also had the same thoughts in the newborn cluster feeding stage. But six months later, there is no better feeling than seeing my two children make each other laugh. It will all be okay.

Whatsername17 Thu 23-Mar-17 08:03:04

Dd1 is 5 and dd2 is almost 9 weeks. A big gap but dd1 is thrilled with her little sister. I find it more difficult splitting my time between the two, especially with bfing dd2. I wish I could hand her over to someone else to have time with just dd1. I'm pumping like a mad woman so that I can take dd1 out for a few hours just us two. I love them both so much and couldn't be without them. It's weird because I never thought I could love anyone as much as dd2. Then dd2 arrived and that love just grew.

Matchstickbox Thu 23-Mar-17 09:15:44

I bed share with DD as well and she bf whenever she likes in the night.
So I guess I need that sorted.
My Dh has said he wants to combination feed this one so I can get a break from Bf.

5moreminutes Thu 23-Mar-17 09:25:49

I found out I was pregnant with DC2 when DC1 was about 16 months and was delighted as we'd been trying for a few months, wanting a small gap. However throughout the pregnancy I had really vivid nightmares about losing (as in in a huge crowd etc) DC1 or her falling down steep drops close to busy roads and being unable to go after her due to having a baby in my arms.

It was all hormones and illogical guilt I assume, and stopped once DC2 was actually born. DC2 is nearly 10 now and the dreams were not prophetic smile

I found two close in age lovely and far easier than it was when I had DC3 with older siblings at school and preschool - when they are small together you don't have to drag the baby about like a package around the older one's school and activity schedule and they have a lot in common very quickly in terms of what they enjoy doing etc. You'll be fine.

Whatsername17 Thu 23-Mar-17 09:40:30

I introduced a bottle of ebm at 3 weeks in preparation for combination feeding in a couple of months. I had lactation failure with dd1 so she was ff after bfing failed. This time around, dh has found having to be hands off very difficult. He tells me he is proud of me for bfing but I can tell he hates it. I express in the morning and he gives dd the bottle before bed.

MieMoosMummy Thu 23-Mar-17 10:00:03

We combi fed DD1 until she was about 8 weeks, I think? It did mean I could get a bit more sleep but honestly I regretted it. I'm not sure if that's to do with formula guilt or some such but I also came very close to giving up bf really early because of it. If it works for you and you're comfortable with it then great but I would advise proceeding with caution as it can affect supply.
I'm hoping to tandem feed but no idea what I'll do in the night if we can't fit everyone in!!

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