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How old is too old?

(46 Posts)
SheShellsSeaSells Tue 07-Mar-17 19:00:10

I'm already a mum to 3 kids. My question is, how old would you say is too old to have another baby? I won't tell you how old I am just yet as I dont want to sway any answers!

slithytove Tue 07-Mar-17 19:05:29

I suppose if your body still can, then you aren't too old!

For me there are several facets.

First baby?
Spouse age
Any age gap between kids

For me personally, I would say since you've already had kids, that if the age gap isn't more than 5 years, and if you are in good health, then anything up to about 47 is pretty normal.

But what an arbitrary number! It's all individual.

Snowflakes1122 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:26:19

As PP says, its individual. You know your limits, physical health and energy levels.

I'm expecting number 4 and I'm shattered at 31. Although I don't think age is a factor in that, it's just hard when you have 3 other children to look after whatever the age. So that's something to think about.

FourToTheFloor Tue 07-Mar-17 19:29:58

I can only say for me I felt I wanted dd2 before I turned 40. But it's very personal, I think I'd be more concerned if you didn't have any dc already and were past 40 - worried about your ability to conceive I mean.

GreedyDuck Tue 07-Mar-17 19:31:48

I think 45 is my cut off. But then I had my dd at 40 and am pregnant again at 43. My mother had me at 39 (16 & 17 year age gap between me and my brother and sister) my sil had her ds at 42, so it's pretty normal in our family.

MrsJayy Tue 07-Mar-17 19:33:36

Im (nearly) 46 and for me i couldnt do babies but it is personal really

MrsJayy Tue 07-Mar-17 19:37:41

My eldest child is in her 20s though so my time for babies has passed. My friend had her last baby at 43 and it really isn't to old.

Clare2017 Tue 07-Mar-17 20:03:37

I will be a week off 41 (all things being well) when I have my first baby in October. Just never happened for me before now, I guess.

MrsJayy Tue 07-Mar-17 20:07:18

Congratulations clare

YoureMyWifeNowDave Tue 07-Mar-17 20:09:15

I'm 45 and have a 6year old and a 7 month old grin

MumUndone Tue 07-Mar-17 20:09:18

For me personally, I'd like to finish having kids before I turn 40.

Funnyonion17 Tue 07-Mar-17 20:13:34

I would say 35+ would be too late for me. Simply because I'd like to have a life again before I'm 50!! Having my last now at 31

dalmatianmad Tue 07-Mar-17 20:14:04

Just turned 41 and cannot imagine going through all those sleepless nights again.

Mine are teens now and starting to become independent, we can wander down the local on a Friday night and leave them at home or go cinema.

I can have a lie every Saturday morning.

Hats off to all you older mums , my sister recently had a baby at 40 and I'm knackered just looking at her grin

Crunchyside Tue 07-Mar-17 20:16:38

It's a personal thing - I am 27 and about to have my second, I wanted to finish having kids before I'm 30! That way by the time I'm 50 they'll probably be moved out grin

Scottishweddinghelp Tue 07-Mar-17 20:20:59

For me my arbitrary cut off was 35 (though due to give birth to #3 soon after I turn 36).

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Tue 07-Mar-17 20:23:06

I had ds at 43 but ttc again at 45 and miscarried so assume I am too old now physically. sad

ChocChocPorridge Tue 07-Mar-17 20:25:38

I'm 38. I have 2 (only got started at 32).. DP is very very broody. I'm less sure (although I have easy pregnancies so far, I've had 2 EMCS).. I don't mind babies, it's the thought of more kids than hands that worries me (and I'm one of 4, so it's a realistic impression of bigger families!)

Fairylea Tue 07-Mar-17 20:27:31

I'm 36 and I have two dc ten years apart, youngest is 4. I am done now, I actually feel really old now, my health feels more fragile now as the last birth I had was very difficult. I can't imagine going through it all again.

Ilovewillow Tue 07-Mar-17 20:44:08

I had my second at 42, I'm now nearly 45 and after a lot of fertility issues and IVF for both of my children I feel too old now for another.

StarUtopia Tue 07-Mar-17 20:46:31

Had mine at 38 and 39..would love no 3 but I'm now 42 and for me that does feel too old. The thought of being nearly 50 when trotting into reception and the rest of the mums being young enough to actually be my children.!

MyBreadIsEggy Tue 07-Mar-17 21:36:24

Very much an individual choice.
I had my first at 21 (DH 26), second at 22 (DH 27).
30 is the cut off for me. No more babies after 30.

MyBreadIsEggy Tue 07-Mar-17 21:37:11

Very much an individual choice.
I had my first at 21 (DH 26), second at 22 (DH 27).
30 is the cut off for me. No more babies after 30.

cuddlesandchips Tue 07-Mar-17 21:38:42

My cut off is 35 - it's not the having a baby at 40 that is a concern it's hitting 60 and having late teenagers/early twenties

WafflingVersatile Tue 07-Mar-17 21:40:09


MamaHanji Tue 07-Mar-17 22:03:53

I had my first at 19. So while I'd say that 45 would be what I think is the age that is not yet 'too old' to have babies, I also wouldn't judge anyone over that age unless you're like 60 and then I would think that is too old! My main basis would be on the age of your current children. I wouldn't want a gap of more than 10 years between my eldest and my youngest. I'm 22 and I have a friend that is 45 with 2 children the same ages as mine. I started early, she started late. I will say that physically, I cope with the demands of motherhood better. Though she is much more financially secure. Pros to being young and being older.

If you want another child and your body still can (or adopt), then go for it!

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