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Please help with excuses not to socialise

(9 Posts)
DestinationSofa Mon 06-Mar-17 08:40:49

Hi all,

I am almost bed bound with pregnancy sickness managing to go into work just about a few days a week. I now have anxiety from friends pressurising to meet up with me. I said I was unwell a few weeks ago and now they are trying to arrange again. It's only early days and I don't feel comfortable revealing the news yet, any good ideas from people in a similar position !? I feel bad being awol but I can't face it feeling so awful.

TheTartOfAsgard Mon 06-Mar-17 10:58:23

Say you're saving up for something and can't justify spending the money.

Sparklyuggs Mon 06-Mar-17 13:15:38


Sorry to hear you are struggling. I had a wedding to go to at 8 weeks which caused me a lot of worry. I told my bf who was also going, and the day before said I had been sick all week with norovirus and was still feeling ropey which explained the no drinking and looking pale/green.

Apart from that I did a combo of pretending to be busy already, migraines, uti.... This was all over the December party season so was far busier than normal. I think something close to the truth is best like 'I can't make tonight, I'm feeling really sick and can't face going out'. If you have a friend who you can tell I found that really helped detract from me as she'd back up my excuses or change the subject.

Lules Mon 06-Mar-17 13:18:41

I've just said I'm ill (which I have been) and been a bit vague. No-one's really pressed me on it.

tatatetelle Mon 06-Mar-17 13:44:38

Hi - these first few weeks are the worst but it gets easier so hang in there! I'm 5 months pregnant and back to feeling great smile

I told my friends I was knackered and swamped with work the first few weeks, which was true, and yet not the whole truth. We really didn't want to tell anyone until I was out of the first trimester and that worked for us.

It's only a very short period of time and once you're able to share the news they'll all understand and be happy for you. Some might even guess and either ask, or not say anything until you announce it. I wouldn't make up some elaborate lie or anything, you've got enough going on!! Just say you're not feeling great, want to catch up on sleep and will let them know when you're out of this phase. And then go out with them and tell them the fab news!

Hope it gets easier for you v soon x

DestinationSofa Mon 06-Mar-17 14:27:13

Thanks all, just feel so guilty as often friends plan really far in advance and I won't know if it will have passed in 3/4 wks which I doubt. Only 7 wks

Frillyhorseyknickers Mon 06-Mar-17 14:57:59

Mine has started so subside this past week (I'm 11+6). I have curtailed social activities to dog walking etc. I've had year end at work and some shitty client deadlines which has helped (the excuses, NOT the sickness [hmm )

I would just keep fobbing off telling little fibs.

tatatetelle Mon 06-Mar-17 16:48:07

Don't feel guilty, you're growing a human being! And regardless it's ok to be tired or not in the mood sometimes. Really they'll all understand when you tell them, surely they're not going to make a fuss because you can't commit to a night out or two in the meantime.
If it helps, since they like to plan ahead, why don't you plan something with them for when you'll want to tell them so you all have something in your diary and you won't feel like you're avoiding them indefinitely?

DestinationSofa Sun 12-Mar-17 20:36:14

Still making the excuses and puking envy haven't left the house all weekend. Have put something in the diary for the end of April - fingers crossed.

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