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11 weeks previous missed miscarriage

(9 Posts)
user1488270375 Tue 28-Feb-17 08:39:41

I'm 11 weeks and 1 day pregnant, I've had a previous missed miscarriage which is constantly on my mind. I don't feel like I can enjoy this pregnancy at all. When I feel sick I'm so happy because I know the baby is fine and then if that stops for a couple of days I feel panicked and worried. My husband doesn't know what to say or do but I wanted some advice from people as my scan still isn't for another couple of weeks. How can I tell if everything is still okay until then? And is it normal to feel like you don't want to bond with the baby until you know it's still alive? I feel terrible for even asking! X

Snowflakes1122 Tue 28-Feb-17 08:51:48

I had terrible anxiety in the early weeks of pregnancy after my mmc.

Sorry for your loss.

For me having an early scan helped, also passing the gestation my baby died felt a milestone too.

It does mess with your emotions, so your feelings are completely normal. flowers

Like I said, a private early scan helped me feel better-is this an option for you?
Also using my doppler in the early weeks. That being said, for some people doppler a can make them more anxious. For me it helped though until I started feeling kicks then doppler got put away.

The worry doesn't really go for me, but it's definitely got lots better as the weeks go on. I think that's how many feel in pregnancy after a loss.

Mantha9871 Tue 28-Feb-17 09:04:15

In the previous pregnancy I paid for a private scan but lost the baby further on. I said to my husband about having one this time and he's really against it! He just wants to wait as he said we won't be able to change anything. I know he's right but I'm the one laying there constantly awake at night panicking!! Thank you for replying!

oliversmummy26 Tue 28-Feb-17 12:03:45

I felt exactly the same as you, had a mmc at 10 weeks in December. Currently pregnant again and am 12+2, we had our 12 week scan yesterday.

I'd had 3 scans previous to that, because I was just so worried and anxious all the time. I did have a couple of bleeds and some funny discharge so they were for peace of mind really. DH was very supportive and aware that me being stressed and worried isn't good for me or the baby.

Do you have a date for your 12 week scan? I have found that it was such a huge milestone and despite having the scans before this one it's the one which seems to have (for now at least) settled my anxiety quite a bit.

I was exactly the same with symptoms, I felt like death up until a week or so ago and thought that was great as it made me feel like this baby is a fighter. Then they started to come and go and just like you I would panic when I felt well!

Your DH is right that having a scan won't stop you miscarrying, but it will reassure you, and once you've seen a strong heartbeat the chances of mc reduce drastically. Having said that, you must be due your 12 week scan soon, so maybe as you've made it this far, you can wait a few extra days?

Have you seen the staying positive after miscarriage thread? A lovely bunch of ladies, all in the same boat but at different stages of pregnancy, so really helpful with information and positive vibes!:

Helbelle75 Tue 28-Feb-17 19:45:06

I had a mmc at 10.5 weeks last May, and was pregnant again by the July.
I've also been pretty anxious, but trying to stay positive for baby's sake, enjoying every minute that I'm pregnant, rather than thinking what if.
We had a private scan at 10weeks, and seeing the heartbeat was the best thing ever.
I'm now 34 weeks and have had some wobbles, but all is fine.
Hope all goes well for you.

stodgy13 Wed 01-Mar-17 16:33:17

hi there
I'm currently in the exact same boat as you.
have had two misscariages (one was missed) and currently 11 plus 4 weeks pregnant and very anxiously awaiting dating scan in 8 days time. couldn't come sooner.
I have had a few scans at epu but once heart beat was good and strong at 7 weeks have been told to wait till dating scan. husband scared of having any more private scans as one nurse mentioned they didn't know the risks of having too many scans in early pregnancy.
the waiting is horrid. as awful as it sounds I just want to know either way (although obs hoping it goes well).
I know this probably doesn't help much but I do get how your feeling. I'm there with you.
here's to hoping it all goes well for people like us!!

Mantha9871 Thu 02-Mar-17 08:52:10

Thank you so much all of you!
I went for a walk yesterday and got quite a lot of sharp abdo pain so they've now brought my scan forward and it's this afternoon. I'm petrified and hardly slept a wink.
I think our other halves struggle sometimes to know how we feel! All david ever says is just relax! It will be fine!
I know it's a kind thing but it doesn't help!!! I wish you all luck and I'm keeping everything crossed for all of us xx

stodgy13 Thu 02-Mar-17 09:10:13

good luck for today. thinking of you.

thisismadness77 Thu 02-Mar-17 15:21:00

Hope all went well.

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