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I feel like an emotional wreck...

(7 Posts)
LittleBump123 Wed 08-Feb-17 10:15:41

Being pregnant has seriously brought out the emotional side I never knew I had. I'll be laughing one minute and the next in floods of tears. I can't watch a movie without crying at the happy ending or love story that's going on. I'm currently 25 weeks, and loving every second of movement I can feel. From the light tickles and hard kicks, I'll never forget this feeling. With every greatness there is always a downfall slightly, isn't there?
I'm still young, 22 and having my first child. My and my partner (25) have been together a few years and have always spoke about kids, both excited by the idea of becoming a family and settling down. For me I've been through the partying and finding myself stage-some may not believe me when I say this but I ready to become a mother. I want this, the thought of partying/drinking and struggling through life bores me. This is want i want. My partner never been a party guy is although older than me a lot younger in maturity levels. He is still dreaming of travelling here and staying in hostels/vans. I had to remind him, hes going to be a father, our dreams aren't what matters now. And honestly as soon as I said these words, I could see he understood but did not 100% realize everything this was going to bring. Am I being unfair? Should I let him go and discover himself, or is what I have said true? I feel I just need someone to tell me I'm not doing wrong, that he'll be ready time of birth. I know nobody is going to be 100% ready for a child, but you know when you feel it's my fault he can't do all this, being emotional as I am right now, I just want to do the right thing. He's over the moon we are having a child of course he is, but he wasn't expecting the get up and go to disappear. Am I over thinking things too much? I'm ready for this i, am I asking too much for him to be aswell? confused

kshaw Wed 08-Feb-17 11:27:21

I'm 28 weeks and never thought wanted kids (I'm 32) until it happened by accident and now super excited. But I have always wanted to go travelling again and do more exciting things than 'settle down'. But me and OH have discussed it - a child doesn't mean no travelling or only going to 'resorts' we can still see new things and experience cultures and new experiences, just have to be a bit more careful with a child in tow. We have also set up a travelling fund, we are both putting £20 a month each into a savings account, it isn't much but in 15-20 years when we can feasibly start looking at a sabbatical year it will be a decent starting point. Plan ahead, don't tell him your dreams have to stop-theu don't, they just have to be paused or rethought - and I bet once the baby is here is dreams will change completely!

Littlejayx Wed 08-Feb-17 11:50:36

Hi LittleBump,

I just wanted to say, I'm 23 and get exactly the same comments about being "ready to be a mother" this will be my first, the thought of going out bores me to tears! If done all that and now cannot wait to start our little family life!

Your partner sounded alot like mine in the beginning . He's 26 and attitude completely changed from the whole travelling/ spending money on stupid things. Now still early ish on (18 weeks) hes a different person! every thought money wise, planning wise , travel wise involves the baby.
Just humor him for now, give him time and this will change!

drinkyourmilk Wed 08-Feb-17 11:55:14

I think each family is different. My bil and sil went directly from the hospital to stay with family, a few days each home. They are still out the whole weekend and enjoy taking their lo to different events and activities. Their lo has a blast and approaches life with the same gusto as they do. She's a sweet, mainly well behaved little girl who has time for everyone. My dh and I are completely different. We are stay at home people, with select friends and activities. However we are both passionate about our individual hobbies. I expect that our baby will model us more, until they go to school and see different ways of living.
There is no right or wrong way- it's all down to what you feel comfortable with.
There is no reason to curb dreams or activities, I think you both just need to sit down and ensure that your baby's needs, and families needs, are being met too.

Badgerbird Wed 08-Feb-17 15:35:22

Congratulations op smile

It is a very emotional time isn't it!! I'm 24+5 and my emotions are all over the place!

We are a couple who have enjoyed many a festival, camping holiday and roadtrip over the years and don't plan on stopping completely. We will be slowing down and getting used to having a child yes as this is our first. We are however planning to go away in our old bus/camper van when baby is 3/4 months old. My husband thinks this will be easy, I think it will come with its own challenges! We are both late 30's and I was worried if he was ready (sometimes if I was ready!!) but he has totally stepped up to the mark, putting baby and me first bless him. Give yours a chance and I'm sure he'll find his way.

I think the main thing is to keep talking to eachother about your hopes and dreams for you all as a family unit. How you see your life together, how you want to live, what values you want to pass on to your little one.

Surely having a baby will be the biggest adventure of all!!

LittleBump123 Thu 09-Feb-17 15:02:26

Hi,

Thank you all for your response. I honestly feel like I'm not the only person how may slightly over think while pregnant. And that I'm not the only emotional person out there also.

I do need to realize that both of us do not need to stop thinking about dreams but just to adapt and think about planning better as we have the child.

Reading these have helped me, alot. Thanks everyone. x

Mustbeinsane1984 Thu 09-Feb-17 15:44:45

Bless you little bump! Congratulations! So many emotions when pregnant I can relate completely. Your man will come round and you will probably see a massive change in maturity when baby arrives. Even with a baby doesn't mean you have to change all your dreams and things you like. My husband and I are pretty big party people! Still are, just a little less alcohol and a bit more responsibility. I was apprehensive how my OH would cope with a child, we are in our 30s but it turns out he wings it just perfectly! smile We are big travelers and have travelled all over the world together and when our little one came along he joined us on our travels. DS will start school next year and we are just back from a 6 month trip in Asia, made extra special as we could share it with him too. Don't give up on your dreams just share them together. Good luck smile

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