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My boyfriend has been distant with me and I know why

(8 Posts)
user1485805444 Mon 30-Jan-17 19:53:26

So during my pregnancy my boyfriend wouldn't come near me and would never come to bed the same time and would always stay up late . At first I thought he was cheating but found out he was watching porn . I had the baby 6 weeks ago and he still the same and now my confidence is very low just wondered should I just get over it and stop worrying I feel awful as if I'm not good enough I don't know what to do

picklemepopcorn Mon 30-Jan-17 20:01:37

Sorry. No advice just flowers

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 30-Jan-17 20:07:32

Have you asked him why?

usernoidea Mon 30-Jan-17 20:08:50

Does he know you know this? Have you spoken to him to tell him how it's making you feel?
I'm sorry you're having a shitty time x

user1485805444 Mon 30-Jan-17 20:10:17

Yes confronted him and asked him about staying up and looking at other girls and he just said sorry and wouldn't do it again but he does it when we're out always looking and makes me feel horrible I've just given birth to our beautifull daughter and he has knocked my confidence to 0 . I don't get why I am not good enough now I don't know what to do

user1485805444 Mon 30-Jan-17 20:12:32

I've seen the stuff he looks at it on his phone and I can't compete with the women he's looking it

ImperialBlether Mon 30-Jan-17 20:13:57

He needs to be told that porn is going to destroy your relationship and his relationship with his own child, too. He needs to choose porn over his family. What a horrible situation for you.

picklemepopcorn Mon 30-Jan-17 22:10:52

Don't let his problem become your problem. You don't need to compete with the girls on his phone. You need to be a lovely mum and a real live warm human being. He has to understand that he can't have both, not because you are being judgey or stuffy but because men have problems with sex function if they use too much porn, it's addictive, and he is creating a distance between himself and the mother of his baby.

I would tell him you understand why he started, but he needs to stop now.

And that women in porn are rarely entirely consenting.

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