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"I don't want you involved in this pregnancy!"

(46 Posts)
Gregwar Wed 11-Jan-17 22:27:02

It's really breaking my heart to hear about all you "soon to be a mum"/"soon to have another baby" ladies who have partners who are wanting to bail on them and you're nowhere near your due date. Pregnancy can be stressful enough (obviously not talking from experience), and the last thing you need, is loss of support.

Being a man on the other side of the spectrum, I wanna hear anyone and everyone's story.
I'm currently wanting to be as involved as I can but the relationship between me and my baby mum has grew unhealthy. I want to do all I can to make "us" work and to be a family, but things aren't going to plan.
It's very early days, and I need to be patient. If it's one thing that this situation is teaching me, it's patience.

But what's your story?
Are you in a situation where your partner wants to wash his hand of all responsibility?

I especially wanna hear from the mums who actually don't want their partner to take any responsibility for whatever reason....what are your reasons?

raviolidreaming Wed 11-Jan-17 23:42:32

You sound like a journalist or researcher... hmm

sj257 Wed 11-Jan-17 23:48:43

Bizarre....

gamerchick Wed 11-Jan-17 23:55:21

That has to be the most transparent piece of hidden shizzle I've read in ages that grin

Try harder man!

CafeAuLaitMerci Wed 11-Jan-17 23:56:44

0/10

shivermytimbers Wed 11-Jan-17 23:57:17

Wanna? That makes me cringe...

10Betty10 Wed 11-Jan-17 23:57:29

I feel a total a mug for being so nice to this OP on his posts a few days ago. Even answered when he PMed me!

Clearly researching for some reason. Either that or some weird attention seeking thing.

10Betty10 Wed 11-Jan-17 23:58:22

Ps. I blame pregnancy hormones for my clearly poor judgement!!!

Ohdearducks Wed 11-Jan-17 23:58:42

Oh dear you're not very good at this are you?

Quack.

mrsC4 Thu 12-Jan-17 00:00:52

Nice try Greg nice try 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

NovemberInDailyFailLand Thu 12-Jan-17 00:03:21

Sorry, G-Man. We don't want you involved in our pregnancies.

calimommy Thu 12-Jan-17 04:54:19

There's the door.

arbrighton Thu 12-Jan-17 09:22:34

Sounds like a Jeremy Kyle episode in the making

Especially only a couple of days since his first sob story post

Gregwar Thu 12-Jan-17 09:43:39

The reason I posted this was to try and get perspective on the matter. I'm not a researcher and 10Betty10, I genuinely really appreciated your help.

I saw a thread before posting this where women were saying how their partners didn't want anything to do with the baby and such. I can't comprehend it. I want nothing more than to be involved with my baby and my partner's life.
So far the advice that you all have given has been really helpful and has given me a new perspective on things and so I wanted to just pick your brains on why perhaps you wouldn't want a man involved.

Admittedly, I had a lot on my mind and wasn't thinking this through. I suppose it's a bit of an invasive question and I apologise.

Gregwar Thu 12-Jan-17 09:44:11

Shit like this is probably the reason my partner doesn't want me involved lol

Gregwar Thu 12-Jan-17 09:47:33

Wow...I say ONE wrong thing and this is what happens?

I get told I'm writing "sob stories" and that I'm a "researcher" etc etc. There literally was no hidden agenda here.

Jheeez, how do I delete this?

PurpleDaisies Thu 12-Jan-17 09:51:06

I saw a thread before posting this where women were saying how their partners didn't want anything to do with the baby and such. I can't comprehend it. I want nothing more than to be involved with my baby and my partner's life.

I think this can be summed up with "some people are arseholes". You don't need to hear from women who have been abandoned by their partners since clearly you have no intention of doing that.

SpeakNoWords Thu 12-Jan-17 09:54:41

You generally can't get your threads deleted, unless there's a genuine reason why. You could report your own opening post and ask MNHQ if they will delete it, they might agree to.

There are very often journalists etc who post OPs that are similar to yours, fishing for personal stories. At the moment, many threads on here are ending up in the Daily Mail, which makes a lot of posters quite wary of anything that seems like a fishing attempt. Try not to take it personally if you can.

PuraVida Thu 12-Jan-17 09:54:56

Why don't you tell us about how and why your relationship became "unhealthy"? What form did this unhealthiness take?

MsGameandWatch Thu 12-Jan-17 09:55:00

Maybe she doesn't think you're a very nice bloke?

Gregwar Thu 12-Jan-17 10:03:11

In all honesty, I'm just struggling. I'm reaching for any sort of conversation on here but I suppose this is the result of being self-centred and inward-looking.
My current situation is pretty shit right now, and this goes beyond problems with my BM. I feel like I'm back at square one. And since I found everyone so helpful and friendly and very open on here, I thought I would try and pick your brains a little bit more just so that I could get a better understanding from a wider perspective than that of my own.
This site seemed like somewhat of a safe haven and it's somewhere I've liked to visit and keep coming back to regularly (which isn't something I would normally do, especially in comparison to the other sites I've been on), because I'm feeling a bit isolated and lonely.
Far away from my family. The family I have here in London aren't there for me. Trying to get the grasp of my new job. And also the fact that the woman whom I love more than any woman I've ever loved (bar my mum and and my sister) seems to not want anything to do with me.

I wanted to know where I was going wrong and if there was something I'd overlooked. I'm not on here trying to research. But I supposed I've already lost everyone's trust now. Despite everything else I've posted on here, ONE thread has lost the trust you may have had in me.
Especially you 10Betty10. I genuinely clung on to your words and what we talked about in private chat. I have to go completely anonymous on here because I have to suppress what's going on with me throughout the day, and pretend like I've got it all together.

Barefootcontessa84 Thu 12-Jan-17 10:03:53

Why do you need to hear experiences of women with men who don't want to be involved, when you do? confused Do you think you shouldn't want to be or something? How are those women's situations any of your business, or do you want to hear so it gives you some kind of ego boost/makes you think you're extra special?

Gregwar Thu 12-Jan-17 10:04:41

MsGameandWatch: There's no chance she thinks that. If anything, she struggles with the fact I'm TOO nice.

Barefootcontessa84 Thu 12-Jan-17 10:05:46

Also the woman whom I love more than any woman I've ever loved (bar my mum and and my sister) hmm

PurpleDaisies Thu 12-Jan-17 10:06:46

If anything, she struggles with the fact I'm TOO nice.

I've never seen ANYONE cut someone out of their life for being too nice.

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