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Alcohol Outing Me!

(38 Posts)
ShiftyLookingBadger Mon 10-Oct-16 14:08:40

Help!

I have a friend's wedding coming up, it's abroad. They are loaded so there will be a OPEN BAR!!! Obviously, I won't be drinking but I know that as soon as my friends see me without several a complimentary gin in my hand they will instantly know in pregnant.

It's very early days and these friends aren't overly close so I'm not willing to spill the beans just yet.

The antibiotics excuse doesn't really hold these days as most of them are ok to take with alcohol. Does anyone have any corker excuses stowed away please??

BaronessBomburst Mon 10-Oct-16 14:13:34

I walked around with a glass of wine in my hand. No one noticed I wasn't actually drinking it.
I also drank mineral water with ice and lemon which everyone presumed was a G&T.
And as for the toast, I did actually drink that one. wink

LurkingQuietly Mon 10-Oct-16 14:16:09

Agree with baroness - wander around with a drink in your hand. That's what I did. I kept it at around 3/4 full and every time someone offered me one, I said I was ok. Best to love from group to group with this is possible though. Also, get your OH to drink whatever your fake drink is if possible and keep swapping with you. Congratulations!

LurkingQuietly Mon 10-Oct-16 14:16:40

Ahem. Move from group to group, not love ffs.

MrsH87 Mon 10-Oct-16 14:16:57

It's so tricky. I had the same at a hen weekend when I was only 4 weeks. I went armed with a bottle of de-alcoholised wine and hoped no one would notice or ask for a glass! I also offered to drive when we went out. Everyone guessed (as it goes), but were polite enough to let it slide until I announced it. Can you drink just tonic water and pretend it is g&t? During the meal and toast you could accept the wine, but not drink it. I don't think people tend to notice whether your glass has been topped up or not. Congratulations!

FrazzleM Mon 10-Oct-16 14:21:15

Congratulations!

Excuses for not drinking don't usually work and only draw attention to the fact that you aren't drinking. Just pretend. No one will notice. Accept drinks, leave them lying around. Offer to go to the bar and get yourself a soft drink.

minijoeyjojo Mon 10-Oct-16 14:21:40

Definitely do the above, people notice if you refuse a drink so just accept them but don't drink it! I would sit next to my DH and every now and then just take his half drunk glass and he'd take my full one. For toasts etc just raise the glass to your lips but don't drink anything. I doubt anyone will notice.

Also prep DH to get you 'gin and tonics' aka sparkling water and lemon wink

AmeliaJack Mon 10-Oct-16 14:22:20

I went to a work awards ceremony when pregnant. I drank nothing but water but none of my colleagues noticed. In fact one commented that I had more than usual. grin

I find that as long as you have a glass in your hand and occasionally move it in the direction of your mouth no one even notices. The trick is to occasionally swap glasses with your DH or randomly abandon glasses on other tables.

In general people just aren't that observant.,

SellFridges Mon 10-Oct-16 14:30:46

Everyone will guess, but most of them will be too polite too mention anything.

suspiciousofgoldfish Mon 10-Oct-16 14:30:55

Agree with keeping a drink in your hand, tonic water or whatever.

I was PG at Christmas (and my family are a bunch of wine-glugging harpies), so I kept a glass of red grape juice on the go. No one noticed.

Don't bother with excuses as to why you're not drinking if you normally would. Everyone will assume you are pregnant.

ShiftyLookingBadger Mon 10-Oct-16 15:56:10

Thanks ladies, them's some wise words! Unfortunately DH isn't able to make it to the wedding so he won't be my partner in crime on this occasion.
I have to admit, my main concern is that my director from work is also going (mutual friend!) and he is still anxious from my last maternity leave (pregnancy is DC2) as my replacement was a bit naff. Last time he LITERALLY guessed I was pregnant there and then when I turned down a G&T at a work do. He also says 'are you pregnant again?' if ever I turned down a cup of coffee or something tasty. He's ridiculous. I fear this is a lost cause, he's bloody Sherlock Holmes!! sad
I think I will have to go with the almost full glass idea and hope for the best grin

Helbelle75 Mon 10-Oct-16 16:03:31

DO you have anyone else close that you can confide in? If not, I agree with the sparkling water and lemon, or even schloer in a wine glass. If it's a free bar, most people will be too p****d an hour in to notice anyway!

SaltedCaramelEverything Mon 10-Oct-16 16:22:36

As you're not taking your DP... is there one friend who you could tell to help take drinks from you? Also as you're abroad ordering cocktails could be an idea? Obviously mocktails, but I'm sure they can make a tequila sunrise look the exact same without the tequila wink have an awesome time and congrats flowers

Nikki2ol6 Mon 10-Oct-16 16:30:47

I asked for Coke in a small glass as though it were vodka and Coke, the bar maid knew instantly but it worked!!

AudreyBradshaw Mon 10-Oct-16 17:21:08

Appletize in a champagne glass.
Blackcurrant and soda in a wine glass.
G&t without the t.
Accept drinks from others and then ditch them.
Wet your lips with champagne or whatever if necessary during the toasts.

I managed till 14 weeks without my family noticing I wasn't drinking (we have at least two meals a week together) when I was starting to plump up (bloat) I said I was giving up alcohol because it was making me fat. Worked a treat. Good luck! Congratulations and have a lovely time!

ConvincingLiar Mon 10-Oct-16 23:22:27

I've been enjoying "and tonic"s.

Hermano Tue 11-Oct-16 11:35:20

Just for arguments sake (not the point of the thread I know) surely you can have a sip or two or even half a glass of booze without harming baby? You don't need to be careful to wet your lips but not swallow any?!
My rule is one small drink a week.
Friend's mum was told to drink a bottle of wine every day and stay in bed when she was pregnant with friend! I'd not advise that but surely a few sips won't cause any harm?

AudreyBradshaw Tue 11-Oct-16 14:39:52

hermano I think you're right. My midwife said a glass of wine every so often isn't going to cause FAS or anything. It's just me personally, I've been far too frightened of doing damage to drink any alcohol.

Anecdotally, my DM was prescribed to "drink half a pint of stout of an evening" by the midwife because her iron levels were low when she was pregnant with me. Can you imagine that being said now?! grin

NerrSnerr Tue 11-Oct-16 14:46:59

If you have one friend who you can tell it will be easier but I agree keep a glass in your hand. Tonic is a good one and pretend it's gin.

GinIsIn Sat 15-Oct-16 16:52:58

It is NOT ok for your manager to ask you if you are pregnant!! Do you have a work HR department?

MyGiddyUncle Sun 16-Oct-16 11:58:58

G&t without the t

Not sure that would be advisable tbh grin

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties Sun 16-Oct-16 12:03:02

Yes I laughed at G&T without the T. So just neat gin then? grin

AudreyBradshaw Sun 16-Oct-16 12:17:25

Ahahahahaa only just realised my mistake there! grin grin grin

I'm 35 weeks, it's probably wishful thinking! grin

SarahMOs Sun 16-Oct-16 14:04:19

As we were planning on trying from about May this year we made it known we were having a stop on drinking after our big America holiday which no one queried. Helped my the fact my husband has gone a few months before with no drinking to be 'good'. We're just telling people now and I was convinced my parents knew but they said they didn't!

Being the designated driver was my biggest help!

Newmanwannabe Sun 16-Oct-16 15:29:13

Audrey Current guidelines are it's not ok to drink at all whilst pregnant. No one knows what the safe level is and it appears to be different for everyone. I think it also depends on what development is happening at the time for the baby and the early months there is rapid brain development, it's during certain windows of brain development that if you have alcohol it can be a problem.

Sorry OP I didn't want to make a "lecturey comment" but I thought for other people reading the thread who might be pregnant it's important to correct outdated information.

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