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(4 Posts)
lissaconnelly9 Fri 02-Sep-16 22:43:15

So I have a kind of sensitive (?) question to ask - I'm not sure if I'm in the right place for this but don't know where else to put it.

So I'm 14 weeks pregnant, and for the last week or two I've started having quite bad paranoia - at least, this is the only way I can describe it.

It started off as just general worrying, but probably a little bit worse than how I would usually worry about things. My partner works about a 40 minute drive away on the motorway, and when he leaves for work in the morning/comes home in the evening, I've started to have really overwhelming thoughts that he's going to have a terrible car accident/collision and die. This is very vivid in my mind and only really happens in one particular spot that is local to our home, although sometimes it can be just a general image of it happening on the motorway.

This has now been accompanied with me having dreams as well, and near enough once every night - sometimes more, as I always wake up from the nightmares - I dream that my partner has been murdered and never getts to meet our baby.

These dreams/thoughts are very vivid and just generally really horrific and upsetting, and they are always, always about my partner, never myself or anyone else.

I've mentioned it to my mum and my partner who are really understanding and have advised me to speak to someone about it, but in my area I don't have a midwife until I'm at least 16 weeks, and it's a nightmare trying to get an appointment with my GP. Is it worth doing this anyway and going seeing a doctor about it, or am
I overthinking it and it's just one of those things that comes with pregnancy?

Any advice is really appreciated smile

Titchypanda Fri 02-Sep-16 23:11:58

I can't say if it's just a pregnancy thing, but it's always worthwhile talking to someone. Mind usually have a local service. You could try contacting them if you don't want to go to GP.

Myself I have struggled with anxiety since teen years and have been on medication for the last 7-8 years. This is my first pregnancy and I've definitely found my anxiety makes me worry about my husband and family far more than usual. My GP and midwife have been really supportive. There has been a referral to the perinatal mental health team, but they are so in demand it's very hard to get an appointment. I'm still waiting. I'd recommend going to the GP and getting a referral for their IAPT service. A lot of it is self referral so you could keep the number in case you don't feel ready to talk till later on.

Twinklelittlestar1 Sat 03-Sep-16 21:37:35

Hi OP,

I struggle with anxiety too and it's the hormone levels in pregnancy definitely affect it. In the first trimester I felt great but then anxiety crept back in slowly through my second trimester.

I read a pregnancy book the other day about how it was normal to start having fears about things like your partner dying since you are beginning a family and inherently need/ want him to be there to protect the family unit.

I would definitely go to the doctor. I too have been referred to the mental health team for support and am hoping for an appointment soon.

Other things you could try are relaxation or yoga classes. Remember, this is a big change in your life and sometimes we think we're dealing with it and adjusting when actually it takes its toll on us. I find the exact same as you- my daily stresses and worries (even though they sometimes feel small and managable in the day) unravel at night when my brain unwinds and it often affects my sleep.

Good luck

Tinklypoo Sat 03-Sep-16 21:53:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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