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anyone's mum not really being supportive?

(8 Posts)
ilovenavy Fri 24-Jun-16 17:11:17

My mum isn't the most maternal woman and I have always struggled with this, however she is a great nanny to my dd.

I told her about a month ago that I was pregnant. I needed to tell someone other than OH. Baby was not planned and tbh even now I am still in shock and it doesn't feel real.

Thing is my mum won't really acknowledge it. If it does come up, she just goes on about how I need to tell work now, and that when I tell work I will be sacked. She doesn't even know what I do as a job fgs as she's never taken an interest.

I just wish she'd offer support, rather than wind me up with these unsupportive comments!

Please tell me I'm not alone!

KayTee87 Fri 24-Jun-16 20:12:10

That's strange - why does she think you will be sacked hmm what she like when you were pregnant with your first?

LynseyH5 Sat 25-Jun-16 09:37:38

Aw OP that's really sad she isn't supporting you.
My Mum isn't the best at helping but not as detached as yours seems to be.
It must be very hard to ignore her mean comments but try to if you can. Have you got support from others around you? Is you partner there for you?

PeppasNanna Sat 25-Jun-16 13:55:35

Sounds like my mum!

With my last dc, I didn't tell my mum until I was 19 weeks as I knew she would be so negative. Her response? 'Theres still time to get rid if it'.

I would strongly suggest confiding in an other female relative or friend. Someone positive that will listen to you.

Very best of luck.flowers

MrsTickleMonster Sat 25-Jun-16 17:54:23

My mum's the same... More worried about what work will think about me having time off than the fact that I've had several spells of bleeding (including an observation stay in hospital) and worrying growth progress which have all resulted in extra scans and appointments.

She also described our 3/4-D scan as 'disgusting' and 'weird', which, fine I get that some people find them creepy but it's her first grandchild.

Not to mention the fact that she will be on holiday for the birth because 'it might be late so I might be back by then'....

So yes, I feel your pain. I'm getting over/around it by surrounding myself with people who care and who are supportive and reading threads like this which makes me realise I'm not alone xx flowers

ilovenavy Sat 25-Jun-16 18:21:49

I'm sorry to hear that mrstickler. I think for my mum, it's just her.

She's one of those people who also cares what people think.

Perhaps once scans have happened and it's out in the open she may act differently.

HorseyGal Sat 25-Jun-16 22:41:37

Not sure I have much advice, just wanted to say I'm sorry 😟 - she will almost certainly come around though.

My mum has been wonderfully supportive to me, but my partner less so. I'm 34 weeks pregnant with twins & I'm still running around after him and his 2 other children, he has no idea when I'm uncomfortable and struggling, he's more interested in watching football and it's starting to get really upsetting angry so I just wanted to share my sympathies with a fellow Mummy to be! flowers

Pendu Sat 25-Jun-16 22:50:58

My mums like this - I am 20 weeks now and haven't told her (nor has she noticed !). She's just not motherly or maternal, just very practical and kind of cold. My mil is better though but unfortunately we speak different languages and also she's thousands of miles away sad

Don't worry, post here and get support from us smile

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