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Pregnant after Misscarriage in Jan

(20 Posts)
charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 13:28:08

Hi Ladies,
I was due on today but did a test over the last few days and found out after a stressful 5months of trying to conceive after my miscarriage in January I have finally fell pregnant.

Now I am stressing out and really praying I don't miscarry again...
need some advice from someone who has gone through this, how do you not stress out and try not to worry that you are going to go through the same thing again. I don't think I could cope sad
It hasn't sunk in yet fully but don't think it will until I have an ultrasound and see a little heartbeat... want to be excited but Im so scared I cant be at the moment... I have been a wreck emotionally since my miscarriage and fell like now I should be ecstatic which I am but I cant be too much as I then think what if it happens again.

I do already have a son who is 4 and he new I was pregnant before so made it harder from time to time him asking bless him. hell be so happy this time round but going to wait for scan to tell anyone as last time we only told people as it was Christmas so was a nice surprise for close family and friends.

Advice welcome x

positivity123 Wed 22-Jun-16 14:17:34

Been there and the first trimester is very tough but fingers crossed. I'd recommend the Staying Positive after miscarriage thread, it's basically a load of people in the same boat who you can share your freak outs with who won't judge.
I had an 8 week scan as well which made me feel a lot better but remember it's not always a green light.
Miscarriage robs you of an innocence so if ever you feel worried just remind yourself that unless you have miscarriage symptoms then you'll probably be OK. Best of luck

user1463652193 Wed 22-Jun-16 15:45:24

I had a miscarriage in December at 7 weeks, and am now 18+1 with my current pregnancy. I found the first trimester really hard especially when I started spotting (very light and brown) at 9 weeks as this was how my previous miscarriage started. The spotting was on and off for a week so I called the EPU and had a reassurance scan at 11 weeks and there was our little human doing back flips! To be honest, I still worry all the time but as time is going on I feel better about it and am also getting more excited (was not excited at all to begin with, just worried).
I hope that you've got a sticky one this time and all goes well for you.

socktastic Wed 22-Jun-16 15:46:28

Day at a time is really all you can do. I've been there and had the fears that you've stated.
There's more chance of everything going right than wrong so just try to think more on a positive line.

Whatsername17 Wed 22-Jun-16 18:03:15

I miscarried in January at 13 weeks. I have a dd who is 4. I'm 9+2 today and saw a heartbeat on an early scan last week. Completely understand what you are going through. There is a bunch of us sharing our crazy on the 'staying posifrickentive' thread. Come join us!

charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 18:28:23

Aww thanks ladies love this site defo some lovely people here. You made me feel better today smile
I will take one day at a time. I was 8 weeks last time but baby stopped growing at 6 weeks started bleeding here and there so really hoping I don't see nothing. So hard when I go a loo I'm scared to look... incase...
I will join the groups mentioned hopefully we can get through this together
I don't even want to book a doctors appointment yet just want to try and put it to the back of my mind and hope time goes quick then I'll book one and get a quick scan around 10-12 weeks. X

charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 18:31:31

I can't find the group positivity123

Pixie2015 Wed 22-Jun-16 19:32:18

So difficult to stay positive after miscarriages just take each day as it comes - after a miscarriage at start of year nearly 12 w now and think will worry through out - fingers crossed ❤️

mikesh909 Wed 22-Jun-16 20:49:48

This is the link to the thread mentioned by pps:

I'm in a similar situation to you, 17 weeks along now. It does get easier after the 12 week scan, but in my experience the innocence and naiveté of a pregnancy before losses is gone forever. Talking to others who understand is a real lifeline. Come join us!

charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 20:50:00

Yep think I'm the same kinda nice when I forget I am pregnant for a minute as I don't worry then.. doesn't happen often and only found out Sunday x

charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 20:51:07

Aww I agree people who haven't gone through it do not understand x

Nousername2015 Wed 22-Jun-16 21:00:00

I've been there and completely understand how you feel. I miscarried at 11 weeks in March 2015 and fell pregnant quite quickly afterwards. Taking everything a day at a time got me through along with the fantastic ladies on the miscarriage thread that the previous posters mentioned. It is very hard to stay positive but the chance of everything turning out just fine is so much greater than the alternative. My ds is now 23 weeks old and is my world. Best of luck to you and congratulations on your pregnancy.

charlotte1990 Wed 22-Jun-16 22:06:18

Thank you for the advice fingers crossed all will be ok... positive thinking congratulations on your baby xx

Birdie78 Thu 23-Jun-16 08:54:53

Hi I found out I was pregnant a few days ago I think I'm just over 5 weeks iv had a miscarriage and I am terrified that I am going to again or that it's a chemical. I'm so happy I'm pregnant just have this dark cloud hanging over me of fear sad I was feeling really sick a few days ago which is why I took the test and am not feeling sick anymore can symptoms come and go??

charlotte1990 Thu 23-Jun-16 11:11:25

Hi Birdie,
Congrats I know what you mean really is hard...
I only have sore boobs everyone is different they can come and go lets not try to worry.
Do you have kids already?
I am only about 3weeks if that so very early. x

Starspread Thu 23-Jun-16 11:15:56

Oh god I felt desperately worried for the whole first trimester when I got pregnant after an early miscarriage. Yes, one day at a time; sadly, you now know nothing is certain - but what helped me was thinking that actually, healthy stable pregnancies are very sturdy things (think of all the things you've heard about women doing and still having a healthy baby) so as long as I was sensible, it was out of my control and I was neither pregnant nor not-pregnant until the 12-week scan. I cried and cried when we saw the heartbeat.

Birdie78 Thu 23-Jun-16 11:38:46

Hi charlotte yes I have 2 boys already 4 year old and 2 year old have you got any children? Iv just been to the Dr and he said that people who have a miscarriage before still have the same statistics as a woman who hasn't so I'm trying not to worry :/

And starspread that's great advice and iv given up smoking and I don't drink alcohol anyway so trying to do my best smile and yes your right there are women who do alot of bad things during pregnancy and still have a healthy baby so at least our odds are kind of good smile xx

AnythingGoesWithMe Thu 23-Jun-16 11:48:55

I am currently 24wks after having 2 mcs last year. The important thing to remember is that most likely your mcs were a 'freak' occurrence. It's unlikely to be repeated. My GP told me that I was just unlucky to have 2 one after another.
I am still freaking out that something will go wrong. I don't think I will believe it until I am holding my baby.
I agree with pp who said that the mc rob you of innocence. You know what can go wrong.
It's hard but the best thing to do is try and accept that if it goes wrong, so be it. It's nothing you have or will done.
Try and contact your EPU or have a private early scan. It may provide you with some reassurance, I had a scan at 7, 10 and 12 weeks.

charlotte1990 Thu 23-Jun-16 13:49:24

Starspread - I will be the same will be in tears before I think aswell lol... fingers crossed. I am going to take it easy now as these few weeks are crucial and its true what you say some people can get drunk and go mad and have normal pregnancies.
Birdie78 -aww that's nice, I have a son who is 4 so he makes it a bit easier but want another one so bad for him he always asks for a sibling. im going to avoid the doctors till im further along. don't want to go and get an appointment just incase...
AnythingGoesWithMe - sorry to hear you miscarried twice have you found out the sex of the new bubba. deep down think we always know it wasn't anything we did and that everything happens for a reason which I believe but at the time I felt there was no reason at all sad im to worried at the moment I will leave it a few weeks I will mention an early scan when I go but think I want to try and wait till at least 10weeks when I know there should defo be a heartbeat

charlotte1990 Wed 29-Jun-16 17:43:56

Hi ladies unfortunately I lost this baby aswell hope you are all OK x

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