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partners always in the pub??

(11 Posts)
lr12345 Sat 18-Jun-16 22:38:16

So I'm 20 weeks at the moment and every single weekend OH spends most of it in the pub! Today for example he met a friend be hasn't seen for a while at lunch time with the promise he'd be home in a couple of hours. After sitting at home bored most of the afternoon I try calling him at tea time - no answer. Finally gets in touch a couple of hours later saying hell be home within half hour. 2 hours later I'm getting a drunken call asking for a lift!
If this was a one off i wouldn't be too bothered but it's happening more and more regularly. He insists on going to the pub for atleast a couple every Friday, Saturday and Sunday without fail.
If I say anything to him it becomes a massive argument, we both say nasty stuff and things we regret and to be honest I question whether I should just say nothing to keep things simple.

So what I really want to know is anyone else in a similar position? Does it annoy ok and how do you deal with it?

Dlah Sun 19-Jun-16 00:28:43

Yes, yes, yes!!

My other half feels the weekend is his right to get pissed!

Last weekend he thinks his drink got spiked and he passed out by 10pm leaving me unable to raise him (was stopping at his house and I was at mine).

Last time this happened I ended up round there with his mother at 7am after so many hours of no contact assuming something had happened - we banged/shouted on the doors and windows for an hour and ended up calling the police to gain entry - 5 mins later he finally woke up after being comatosed

I wasn't a massive drinker before getting pregnant but I find it even more frustrating now, like he's currently lay beside me snoring like a freight train having been drinking since 5pm and coming to bed 10 mins ago

He can't stop at just 2/3 which would be fine, he has to go further

I'm 21 weeks and royally fed up quite frankly so I feel your issues

lr12345 Sun 19-Jun-16 09:47:56

I feel your pain! They are so selfish aren't they?
I don't want to stop OH from going out but I feel so lonely and sick of spending my weekends sat at home on my own. I actually look forward to going to wor on a Monday cos I know ill have some adult company.

Dlah Sun 19-Jun-16 10:05:11

I gave in at 1am and came down to sleep on the sofa as his snoring got so bad, he's woken up since then to go toilet and knows full well but hasn't bothered to come and speak to me (we'd fallen out before last night anyway) and now he's still passed out in bed.

Not a happy bunny this morning, selfish beyond belief, and he'll be getting a reality check when he wakes up

TheCrumpettyTree Sun 19-Jun-16 10:51:18

Do you think this will change when you have a newborn? I doubt it. You'll be at home exhausted with a new baby and he'll be out drinking all weekend and taking no responsibility. You need to sort this out now or leave. He isn't going to change.

lr12345 Sun 19-Jun-16 11:39:52

Mines acting as if everything is completely normal this morning and even had the nerve to accuse me of been nasty to him last night! Presume he was that pissed he can't remember the majority of the argument.m however must have realised something was wrong as I slept in the spare room!

Sick of explaining that I'm fed up of sitting at home alone on a weekend. The only good thing being that he won't be able to afford to go to the pub when baby is here as his salary will be covering the mortgage, cars and all the bills as I only get SMP!

Afreshstartplease Sun 19-Jun-16 11:43:32

Oh ladies, I am sorry but they so won't change. Voice of experience eight years on.

smellsofelderberries Sun 19-Jun-16 12:49:34

Yeah, you ladies better prepare yourselves for essentially being single parents. Why on earth are you having children with these boys who carry on as they are? I've been with my DH 5 years and he's never blacked out from being drunk hmm let alone doing it every weekend.

ArmfulOfRoses Sun 19-Jun-16 12:54:56

Oh love, he won't suddenly turn into partner/dad of the year because he has to pay all the bills.
He'll either find things to skimp on and still go out or buy from the supermarket and drink at home.

Dlah Sun 19-Jun-16 13:03:13

I make no excuses for him by any means, but the blacking out incident was recent, he'd never been so stupid before and our daughter was planned at a time when drinking was not an issue.

Things change, shit happens, me and my little one will be fine either way

lr12345 Sun 19-Jun-16 14:20:41

I've been with the OH for over 5 years and if I thought he was going to have a mid life crisis and start behaving like this whilst I was pregnant then I probably wouldn't have committed to having a child with him. Unfortunately when we decided to try to start a family my crystal ball must have been clouded up as i didn't see this coming

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