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Should I keep my baby?

(3 Posts)
Stressedout123 Sun 05-Jun-16 17:39:33

Hi everyone!

So I've found out I'm just about 8 weeks pregnant.. The father is someone I was seeing for about a year but no longer together, it was all a big mess from start to finish and his ex has had his first baby in February.

When I first told him we both agreed it wasn't right for either of us and I was going to get an abortion. I didn't want it, I'd just decided to go travelling and do everything I can and experience as much as possible as I'm only 20 and had been stuck with him controlling me for the past year and now all I wanted to do was go live!

I went to have a consultation at an abortion company and they scanned me to see how far along it was, the second I saw it on the screen I just started crying. I could see its heart beating and all I could think was its mine and I should be protecting it, not ending its life before it even has one!

I told the dad what I thought, he told me he can't do it and I've made my choice and I've trapped him so I shouldn't talk to him again and we haven't spoke since.

Now all I can think is would it be fair on my child? To have a dad that wants nothing to do with it but absolutely adore his other child? Or even fair on him to bring his child into the world when he doesn't want it? And what would it do to my life? Being a single parent at 20? Would I feel like I've missed out on things or would I be so in love with my baby I wouldn't care?

I don't really know what I'm asking here, and I know it's very long but I don't have anyone to talk to and I'd just like to hear other people's opinions.

Thanks in advance smile

jcsc Sun 05-Jun-16 17:52:55

Didn't want to read and run.
Only you can make this decision. However the one bit of advice I live my life by is 'if in doubt,dont'
I know plenty of mums with children wth absent fathers and the child is loved and has a great life regardless.
All the best with whatever you decide. flowers

Goingtobeawesome Sun 05-Jun-16 17:56:58

Forget him. Can you be what the baby needs, can you give them all they deserve? Nothing wrong in feeling that you don't want this baby no matter the reason - too young, don't want to be tied to this bloke in anyway, want to travel etc.

My mother went for an abortion with me. She changed her mind as she thought my father would stay. She didn't. I went into care and it was shit. She should have had an abortion.

You sound confused and conflicted. Get yourself some help but whatever you decide don't feel guilty.

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