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is this odd behaviour by friend

(9 Posts)
snugglybearcub Fri 27-May-16 22:25:39

I found out I was pregnant about a week ago. I was in total shock and still am now. I needed to confide in a friend to make it feel more real. I told her and there was no congratulations or anything. Her response was quite cold and "what are you going to do". She then changed the subject swiftly. In a week that's passed she has not mentioned it once.

I am still in shock and kind of hoped shed be there for me as she's the only friend who knows? Now I'm left a bit miffed!

Wolfiefan Fri 27-May-16 22:27:30

Congratulations.
Was she passing comment on your relationship, money situation, housing or lack of stability of any of those?
Could she have had a loss or be trying and failing to conceive?

pictish Fri 27-May-16 22:29:34

Without knowing her it's hard to say.

StealthPolarBear Fri 27-May-16 22:33:10

Well is it good news or bad news? Your op doesn't actually make it clear?

SmallBee Fri 27-May-16 22:33:40

It's hard to say really, it could range from her trying to conceive and the topic being incredibly painful, to babies being so not on her radar she can't imagine pregnancy as a happy event.
Either way it sounds like she is not the right friend for this particular job.

StealthPolarBear Fri 27-May-16 22:34:24

Unless she knew you were happy about it are you sure she wasn't just tying to assume she knew how you felt?

Willberry Fri 27-May-16 22:50:53

I agree that if she knows this is a surprise to you she may have been trying to gauge your feelings from an impartial stand point rather than diving in with a congratulations tgat may not have been what you wanted to hear. Also she may have been ttc herself and find it hard to talk about. As previously said it sounds like she can't give you the support you need right now, do you have any other friends or family who might fit the bill better?

Ellarose85 Sat 28-May-16 07:41:18

A similar thing happened to me with a family member. I was so excited to tell her but her response wasn't what I was expecting. It turned out she had been TTC for a long while and was just about to start IVF treatment.

Thataintnoetchasketch Sat 28-May-16 08:01:24

Are you happy about it? You say you're in shock - maybe she doesn't want to say anything to influence what you do next?

She could be more supportive generally though - maybe asking how you're feeling? Do you need anything for nausea etc while she's staying neutral on the actual pregnancy.

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