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Room sharing?

(17 Posts)
thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 19:25:32

Hiya,

So lately I've been getting a little anxious as I'm due in August and will be a first time young-mum. I currently live with my parents and share a room with my 14 year old sister - I'm on the council housing list for a one bedroom flat but honestly, I'm still expecting a long wait.

Did anyone else have to share a bedroom with someone else and your baby? For how long? How did you/they cope? Did you set any boundaries? Any advice/tips would be helpful please!

NerrSnerr Thu 26-May-16 19:46:26

I have no experience of this but wonder if there are any other options. Newborns tend to be up all hours and I really don't see how that would work with a 14 year old. It could really affect her school work etc. Who else is in the house?

NerrSnerr Thu 26-May-16 19:49:57

I have no experience of this but wonder if there are any other options. Newborns tend to be up all hours and I really don't see how that would work with a 14 year old. It could really affect her school work etc. Who else is in the house?

amysmummy12345 Thu 26-May-16 19:51:25

Depending how big/small house is you might be able to get the council housing inspector round to assess for overcrowding? It might bump you up the list a bit... Failing that, is there a dining room you could turn into a makeshift bedroom?

scandichick Thu 26-May-16 19:55:54

Well, a lot of partners have been in that situation grin

Around here, one of us has stayed with the baby and the other one gone into the spare room, but then my DH is a light sleeper. Is your sister a heavy sleeper? Perhaps she can use ear plugs?

Are you planning on breast- or bottle-feeding? I would strongly recommend breastfeeding, so you don't have to spend a lot of time preparing bottles for a screaming baby. If you're breastfeeding, you just stick the baby on the boob as soon as they whimper - job done.

You might want to think about nighttime nappy changes too - could you do them in another room, as you'll need the lights on?

thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 20:23:27

Unfourtantly we have no dining room. My brother and sister are not allowed to share due to age. My parents even have the smallest room. The rooms are all upstairs so I would have to take baby downstairs just to change her at night times as my sister is a light sleeper. It's not exactly the ideal situation I wanted to be in but it could be worse?... Suggestions?

NerrSnerr Thu 26-May-16 20:41:00

Is the baby's father involved? Are the council aware you'd be sharing with your sister?

navylily Thu 26-May-16 20:53:02

You won't usually need to change a baby's nappy very much at night after the first week or two. Mainly they wake to be fed. If you're breast feeding you should manage this in bed and near dark. If you bottle feed you'll need to go downstairs to get the bottle so may need to take the baby with you (babies generally cry quietly at first and then work up to full volume so by the time you'd sorted out a bottle your sister would be woken up.)

But I'm not sure why you think your sister isn't allowed to share with your brother. Councils have rules about how many bedrooms you're entitled to, but there's nothing saying you're "not allowed" to share with the opposite sex. It's not illegal and won't bother social services. My son and daughter (aged 16 and 12) share a bedroom at their dad's. They have a movable dividing wall thing that gives them both a bit of privacy. I think your sister would probably be better off sharing with your brother at least for a few weeks until the baby is settled into a routine.

Oysterbabe Thu 26-May-16 21:15:36

It will be very, very hard for your sister. My baby woke and cried every 1.5-2 hours for 2 months. To start with they also make all kinds of grunting and snuffling noises all night even when asleep. She might want a blow up mattress in the lounge until things settle.

thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 21:16:01

Ah okay, only because social services have advised us against it beforehand. (my brother is 15- almost 16). The council know I share a room, they gave me 25 points for over-crowding. (Only got 50 in total)

thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 21:18:03

The blow up mattress is a good idea. May end up trying that out. Thanks smile

MsMims Thu 26-May-16 21:21:21

Sorry not sure about sharing but will the council only offer you a 1 bedroom house when you've a baby due? Seems silly to get settled in a one bedroom place when you'll be needing a second bedroom in the not too distant future.

Andbabymakesthree Thu 26-May-16 21:27:14

How old are you?

navylily Thu 26-May-16 21:33:30

I don't think social services will have a problem with your family deciding between them how to make use of the 3 bedrooms you have, unless they have particular reasons to be concerned about your brother or sister. Does depend about how your siblings feel about the prospect though. Maybe best to see it as your sister kipping on brother's floor for a few weeks rather than having to share a room permanently.

Also depends how deeply your sister sleeps.

thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 21:42:23

Thanks for all the comments, unfourtantly it only lets me bid on one bedroom flats at the moment, so will discuss the ideas with my family. smile

Andbabymakesthree Thu 26-May-16 22:00:00

You don't say how old you are. Have you seen a young person's advice centre regarding other housing options? Mother and baby placement. Private rented?

thehisuix Thu 26-May-16 22:09:06

Sorry, didnt see the comment there. I'm 22, not long moved back to my parents so will look into all suggestions.

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