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Sad as I really don't feel I can carry on :(

(11 Posts)
Sad38 Tue 19-Apr-16 11:19:21

I don't really know what to say but j found out I was pregnant. It wasn't planned to start off with I was sure I was going to keep the baby by my partner was against the idea. He did eventually come around to the idea. However we don't live together and I have been so so sick and ill to the point of where I've been to hospital. I have anti sickness tablets but they aren't working and I just now feel I can't carry on. A family member has cancer and I just think it's all too much. Don't really know what anyone can say but just needed to let it out of me how I'm feeling sad

paap1975 Tue 19-Apr-16 11:21:43

Oh, poor you. I really don't know what to say, but please have a virtual hug from me and know that I am sending you lots of positive vibes. I hope things will look up for you soon.

ItsLikeRainOnYourWeddingDay Tue 19-Apr-16 11:26:32

Having hyperemesis or severe morning sickness is horrendous. I've been there and I think unless you have had it you can not appreciate the affect it has on your mental and physical health.

How many weeks are you?

You sound understandably overwhelmed. Have you seen a consultant or GP to reassess your sickness meds? There are a range of different meds you can try.

Sad38 Tue 19-Apr-16 11:27:11

I'm in so much trouble with my work for being off sick and that upsets me as I'm not choosing to feel this ill. I feel so bad as I know so many people would love to be in my shoes and have a baby but I just feel maybe my body isn't made for this. I can't get out of bed or go anywhere i just feel like I'm trapped in this horrible ill feeling sad

Sad38 Tue 19-Apr-16 11:30:00

I am nearly 10 weeks. At 8 weeks I said no enough was enough and my mental health aswell as physical health was suffering but then I felt better for a couple of days so cancelled my appointment. I feel so guilty as I know this isn't fair on the baby but it's also not fair on the baby having a mum who is not able to properly nourish and care for it. My dr has given me medication and yes it stops me being sick but I feel like I'm spaced out and so dizzy. I try to eat little bits of crackers or biscuits but I feel so drained. I can't even go anywhere in a car as I throw up straight away sad

ItsLikeRainOnYourWeddingDay Tue 19-Apr-16 12:27:01

Do not worry about work. Pregnancy related illness is recorded entirely separately from other sick leave. Pregnancy sickness leave cannot be used against you for dismissal, redundancy etc. Do you have an HR dept ?

53rdAndBird Tue 19-Apr-16 12:30:41

Which anti-sickness tablets are you on? There are different drugs - some might help you more than others.

ItsLikeRainOnYourWeddingDay Tue 19-Apr-16 12:33:22

Def go back to GP and try another medication. How much are you drinking? I found I could tolerate loads of lemonade or Coke. Loads of sugar I know but my body needed the energy.

Is there anything at all you can face eating? No matter how unhealthy it is you should eat it! I had a Big Mac sandwich everyday for a week at one point. No other food would stay down!

Like you I had an appt booked for a termination as I couldn't face being so Ill. I didn't go through with it. Once I hit 12 weeks I felt a bit better and each and every week I have gotten better and better. At 25 weeks I stopped all medications and felt back to normal.

You don't have to go through this though if its not what you want. Only you can make the decision. Please don't do it for the sake of it making others happy. You need to be 100% on board with the idea.

When you go to GP it might also be worth asking to be referred to the perinatal mental health team.

amysmummy12345 Tue 19-Apr-16 12:38:28

My HG trailed off at 17ish weeks, at the time it's relentless, definitely try different meds though... Come over to the HG board, there's a lovely group of women who are so supportive and knowledgeable xxx

Thurlow Tue 19-Apr-16 12:41:48

I second the advice to go back to the GP (or even the hospital if you feel you are becoming very dehydrated) and discuss what other medications are available. HG is shocking and it does severely affect your mental as well as your physical health. It will pass at some point, and there are often medications that may help more than what you are on, but that doesn't stop it being terrible when you are in the midst of it.

However, I think in your case I would call BPAS or Marie Stopes and ask to speak to an adviser/counsellor - not because I think you should terminate, but because these are specialist advisers who can listen to you and talk through the situation. I promise you they are not there just to advise people to terminate.

And then I would call Pregnancy Sickness Support for advice and support too.

Personally, I have terminated an unplanned pg due to fears of going through HG again at a time in my life I couldn't cope with it. If you do decide to do that, you wouldn't be alone, and you wouldn't be the only person.

I hope you feel better soon. But please call some experienced counsellors who may be able to help you come to a decision you are comfortable with x

lokahsamastah Tue 19-Apr-16 16:26:33

Just want to second what Thurlow said really - get medical advice and emotional support from PSS. I've also terminated due to severe hg, now pregnant and suffering again BUT in a completely different place with lots of support, practical, medical and emotional. I simply could not have done this before now.

Talk to people, find out ALL your options - and remember you're not alone, there are others who can offer you support, whatever your decision.

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