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I want to start a family but no one else agrees!

(8 Posts)
starcrossed123 Thu 31-Mar-16 13:42:28

A brief background:

I'm 23 partner 26
I've been with my partner 2 years
We are both financially stable but im the main bread winner.
We own our own home, mortgaged.

I want to start a family. I feel like we are in a position to do so but family, friends and work mates think differently.

The obvious objections are age but I believe I have more maturity then people twice my age. Length of relationship and financial and work commitment.

My partner also has several health issues with recommended surgeries on the horizon but they are unscheduled and we can't wait forever because his conditions are life long and the issues will be life long. My partner is also avoiding the topic for some reason like his health and possibly other things.

Thank you

Floggingmolly Thu 31-Mar-16 13:45:54

If you put every aspect of your life out there for everyone to comment on; they will tell you their opinions, why wouldn't they? confused
Have you taken out an advert in the local paper advertising your plans??

MyKingdomForBrie Thu 31-Mar-16 13:53:23

Only you and your partner need to agree. If you can manage physically and financially then only you and your partner's opinions are relevant.

Bellatrixurstrange Thu 31-Mar-16 13:54:49

23 years is still very young in my opinion but I'm old and grey so there we go. I think you need to respect your partners feelings on this. You have plenty of time being so young to sort out this health issues of his, maybe spend some time with other friends children etc before committing to children. Your partner may be avoiding the topic because he doesn't want children - neither now , not ever.

I'm afraid you need to have a proper honest conversation about your future plans because if children are a deal-breaker for you, you don't want to be looking back regretting years spent waiting for the go ahead.

Maybe due to his health he cannot cope with children and avoids the subject because he is uncomfortable?

Pick the right moment Talk to him. Be honest. Don't put pressure on. See how he feels. RE-evaluate if he says children aren't in his future plans.

Good luck HTH X

bippitybopityboo Thu 31-Mar-16 14:05:47

I honestly think the only people who can have a say in this are yourself and your partner.
I'm 23, 25 weeks pregnant was was married last year DH is 26. We're so happy and feel this is all perfect timing for us but others may not agree!
Everyone is entitled to an opinion you just need to make sure the only ones that count are yours and your partners.
Good luck

cocochanel21 Thu 31-Mar-16 14:26:07

Only you and your partner need to agree when to start a family.

At 23 I had a 8 YEAR OLDshock.

Talk to your partner.

KayTee87 Thu 31-Mar-16 14:29:28

I think it's up to you and your partner. Im not sure why you feel that you need anyone else's approval tbh, my husband and I didn't mention to a soul when we were ttc.

OceanView Thu 31-Mar-16 17:51:06

Why did you feel like you had to discuss it with so many people? It sounds to me like your seeking approval or confirmation and I'm wondering why?

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