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Dreading telling work

(6 Posts)
Sunflower1985 Tue 15-Mar-16 22:01:07

6 weeks, by my estimate.
Ideally I'd wait until after 12 to tell work, but ... I'm starting a project at what will be 10 weeks that I can't do if pg. The company decided a few years ago it wasn't cost effective to address the problems that stop pg people doing the work.

This is going to really put strain on my co-workers having to cover me. Not to mention when I (fingers crossed) go on maternity leave.
As soon as the project starts, if I'm not doing it everyone will know why.
My boss is going to be so mad.
I'm so happy to be pg, I just wish I didn't work in such a male dominated, 1950's backwards thinking place. If men could get pg they would have addressed the issue and everything would be fine. Argh.

candykane25 Tue 15-Mar-16 22:40:31

Not going to comment on your boss being mad or your colleagues being under stress because I've not been in that type of environment.

I told my line manager at 6 weeks because I had hyperemesis gradivarum and was puking at work. But I asked her not to tell anyone and she didn't.
In the Uk for maternity leave there's a date that you need to let your employer know your estimated due date.
Find out your works policy. Wait until your pregnancy is confirmed and then informed your manager.
Don't worry too much about how your colleagues will be impacted. Just focus on your own wellbeing.

shelbTa Wed 16-Mar-16 16:07:00


Just wanted to write to add I totally understand how you feel. I was terrified of telling my boss, as like you, it wasnt going to go down well and would leave my team under pressure.

I won't lie - it wasn't chilled, his face dropped and some management haven't spoken to me since. However that can't be helped - some people just get brassed off, and on the flip side most people have been amazingly and unexpectedly kind and supportive and I feel a like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders now. You'll feel loads better after honestly.

Good luck x

I'm terrified of telling my boss too (I'm 5weeks ish and have an 11month old) as I've only been back a few months. I'm lucky that she's a mother and was already pregnant with her last one when she returned from her previous mat leave. But I still think she's going to be cross with me. Just focus on what's best for you and your baby. Good luck.

SmallBee Wed 16-Mar-16 20:29:46

Good luck. I can't say I know about the unhelpful boss and high stress bit as I work in such a big company that HR would've come down on them like a ton of bricks if they did anything shitty like that.
My advice however is to arm yourself with all the knowledge you can before telling anyone.
Look into your companies policies. If you trust HR then ask them for advice and see if they will be there when you tell your boss.
Also look up your rights in general (paid time off for midwife appointments, pregnancy related sickness not counting against you etc) .
Maybe put together a plan of what support you will need and what you can and can't do.
Congratulations 🎊

Sunflower1985 Wed 16-Mar-16 21:38:24

Thank you, I'm going to come up with a plan with my DH. Trying to focus on what is really important.

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