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everyone said the 2nd trimester would be great! Why do I feel so rubbish??

(19 Posts)
fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 08:52:01

I'm 17 weeks today and so far have been pretty well. I've suffered with exhaustion but that has tailed off and I haven't napped for a few weeks now. What is bothering me is the insomnia, the emotional wreck I am becoming and the aches. I'm waking up several times a night, not needing a wee or anything just bing and awake. I didn't sleep past 3 am on thursday night and Friday at work was awful. I'm getting throbbing headaches which aren't agony but aren't pleasant either. Made worse by the fact painkillers are off the menu, and paracetamol do nothing for me anyway. My hips and legs hurt in the night and while a pillow between the knees helps it doesn't get rid of it fully.

In the daytime I'm pretty good, unless I've not slept in which case I'm a but crap. But it's night time I'm dreading at the moment. Not helped by the fact my OH is ill and he's not ill often. Which I'm glad about as I think I'd murder him if he was. Have spent the last couple of days trying to get stuff done while he's wrapped up on the sofa in a quilt whimpering and shivering. He is genuinely ill but my sympathy is very much lacking!! I'm not a great nurse unfortunately. He's been great with me and a massive help, but I just want to throttle him and tell him to man up!

I'm also crying at stupid things. I dropped a plate yesterday and cried about that. My OH bought me a sandwich with stuff in I'd never choose and that was the end of the world. I wanted crunchy peanut butter and there was only smooth. Who'd choose smooth!!

I'm at MW this week so will have a chat with her. Please tell me I can bask in pregnancy bloom soon!!

SmallBee Sun 13-Mar-16 09:01:09

Poor you OP flowers I'm 18 weeks and while I'm not as bad as you I'm definitely not blooming. My nausea and sickness went my I'm still exhausted and sleep is slow to come and stay.
Definitely talk to your midwife, especially about the headaches.
This is my second pregnancy and I do remember feeling a bit better at some point so hopefully it's just around the corner.

I don't understand what kind of person would choose smooth either!

fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 09:04:25

I know! Smooth, it's just a poor substitute.

I'm probably not as bad as it sounds I'm just feeling tired and hormonal at the moment. The headaches aren't all the time but they like to choose Saturdays. Total waste of a day yesterday so I'm going for a walk today! It's waking at 3am it's like my body is mocking me!

Branleuse Sun 13-Mar-16 09:05:49

because they lied.

Im not pregnant but i think i started feeling a bit less shit at around 20 weeks, and then was ok for a couple of months, until you get too big to do stuff and keep pulling muscles etc

AbiBranning Sun 13-Mar-16 09:05:53

They lie, personally I was knackered from the moment I peed on a stick til I had my beautiful DS. I think the only thing you can guarantee in pregnancy is everyone is different and as we are all making unique little people makes sense our pregnancies will be unique. It's all worth it though!

fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 09:23:41

I'm so happy to be pregnant and I cannot wait to be a mum and to make my OH a dad as he will be completely awesome. But I won't lie, it'd be nice to have some energy and to be able to sleep on my back!

AprilShowers16 Sun 13-Mar-16 09:42:10

I'm 20 weeks and only finally started to feel a bit more 'normal' in the last week or so. I still have to get up in the night to wee and sometimes have back ache or feel sick if I don't eat enough but my energy levels are much better and not feeling sick all the time. Just trying to learn to look after myself and that I can't do everything the same as before!

Beansprout30 Sun 13-Mar-16 09:54:14

I'm 21 weeks now and started feeling 'back to normal' about week 18. I do tend to wake up a lot through the night feeling like I need to pee but when I get to the loo barely anything comes out! I'm assuming it's baby pushing down on bladder.

Hang in there, hopefully you'll start feeling a bit better soon.

Crunchy peanut butter is shocking though! Smooth all day for me grin

Is the sun shining where you are today? It's beautiful here and has totally lifted my mood

fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 09:58:08

No sun but it looks pleasant enough. Am going to go out for a bit and buy something, usually cheers me up!

malvinandhobbes Sun 13-Mar-16 10:01:34

I think it is all relative. The second trimester is relatively better than the 1st and 3rd. I feel better, but no where near as well as I'd feel if I wasn't pregnant. At 20 weeks I feel exhausted, but I can get most everything done. I am watching way more netflix than usual.

I am a on a hair trigger for irritability. I wish I was crying, because I seem to be picking fights at work which is trouble. I have got to stop that.

Have you got a pregnancy pillow? That helps, I find I sleep about every other night. I also don't eat anything 2-3 hours before bed to avoid heartburn, and try to get a good walk in every day to hold off the restless legs.

Champagneformyrealfriends Sun 13-Mar-16 10:32:14

That was me!! It got better around 22 weeks. I felt worse in my second tri than my first. flowers

Sophia1984 Sun 13-Mar-16 13:22:39

It's not just you. I'm 19 weeks. I haven't had any of this 'blooming' that's meant to happen. I am exhausted and still feel nauseous when tired and I have awful, awful headaches. And you wouldn't believe how upset and frustrated I got by ASOS cocking up an order of a maternity dress!

SpecialStains Sun 13-Mar-16 13:34:28

People lie about pregnancy! HCP assured me the constant sickness would end by week 12, then by week 16. I'm now almost at week 18 and still feel constantly nauseous.

I'm also only just starting the constant tiredness feeling.

I do feel marginally better than 1st trimester, but that's probably because I'm now on some antisickness meds that help a little.

I've resigned myself to feeling sick, tired, anaemic, constipated, spotty etc forever now, as I just don't believe it when people tell me things will improve!

CottonSock Sun 13-Mar-16 13:42:14

When I felt awful in my first pregnancy is was aneamic. Worth asking for a check. I have insomnia too, usually in break the cycle with tablets and now I can't do that I end up in the spare room a lot (dh is always annoyingly asleep and annoying me ;)

IndomitabIe Sun 13-Mar-16 14:10:58

I don't know about lies, but not everyone feels wonderful in pregnancy.

In my first I felt awful. Sick for 3 months, then just varying versions of run- down and generally shit.

Hated the whole thing.

5 years later (it took that long to psych myself up to do it again) and currently 38+4 with DC2. This time I've felt brilliant!

I thought people were lying when I felt so awful last time. I also hated that "it's not an illness" mentality, I felt fecking ill for months!

But it turns out that all pregnancies are different. I can't believe how normal I've felt this time.

So sympathies for OP and others feeling rubbish. Do whatever you can to feel better. Screw everyone else and their expectations. thanksbrewchocolate

fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 16:15:59

Looks like I'm not alone smile been for a long walk this afternoon and bought some bits and bobs. Just nice to get some air as it's a lovely day. Bought some lavender spray as well so hoping that helps.

It'll be worth it I'm sure smile

Frank85 Sun 13-Mar-16 19:28:43

Omg crunchy!!!

I though l would feel better in the 2nd trimester after a horrendous 1st one
No I puked for another 3 months and felt so grotty and tired all the time. Plus getting bigger made sleeping properly hard
Hope u feel better soon x

Missingcaffeine Sun 13-Mar-16 20:50:43

I felt crappy, had insomnia, looked crappy and was exhausted until 24 weeks in my first pregnancy. I felt 'almost normal' from 24 weeks onwards in my first pregnancy and my skin and hair became nicer and to be honest, it got better and better until around 32 weeks when I started to feel a bit tired again - probably as the size of me meant I didn't sleep so well.
I felt better in the final weeks than I did in the first 18.
I'm 22 weeks with my second and still feeling exhausted and emotional and occasionally nauseous, but much better than earlier on. My skin has suddenly cleared up over the last few days and my hair is much nicer too in the last few weeks.

Definitely crunchy over smooth.

fruityb Sun 13-Mar-16 21:15:12

Crunchy winning lol. Shouldn't ever make you cry though!

I feel much better today. Yesterday was just a write off felt so poorly. I'm hoping for a better night sleep wise. Feeling almost normal today save for the large lump in the middle!

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