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Can't take Dh stress

(26 Posts)
NotSpeaking Fri 12-Feb-16 09:57:36

I'm 41+3 now. Lost my mucus plug last night, it's our daughter bday on Sunday. Haven't had any contractions but def lost the plug. DH is going mental saying I better not move til after Sunday so our kids don't have bday on same day, which I don't want either but he's going on and on and on about it to the point I don't want to hear his voice. Spent the last 10 mins sobbing in the toilet. I can't control my body or what's going to happen.

KatharinaRosalie Fri 12-Feb-16 10:00:26

You're 41+3, it is likely to be quite imminent, no? What exactly is he expecint you to do??

And honestly there are worse things in the world than a joint birthday.

brookeberry Fri 12-Feb-16 10:06:55

I read your last post and he seems obsessed with dates! What the hell does it matter. If the baby's coming, the baby's coming. Maybe this is his way with dealing with the worry of you going through childbirth - is he diverting the worry onto insignificant details?

Hope you're okay. Just go with your body and your baby, and all will be well.

Sunshine511 Fri 12-Feb-16 10:24:17

I don't know if this will help but my brother and I share a birthday! 3 years apart and I am the younger one. I absolutely love sharing my birthday and so does he! I've never known any different but it's been lovely to have that extra connection with a sibling! I am one of 5 children so I also have siblings who have their own birthdays and I was never envious of this whatsoever. We had some joint parties and a brilliant celebration on my 18th and his 21st! I honestly don't think it's something to concern yourself over at all! Like you said, you can't control it and also, your children might love it just like my brother and I do!x

Sunshine511 Fri 12-Feb-16 10:28:00

Before reading your post, I would never have thought anyone would have seen sharing a birthday as a bad thing! It's a really funny coincidence, an interesting talking point and also, I had someone else to count down the days with and get excited with as a child!! I definitely wouldn't have had it any other way!!x

Frazzled2207 Fri 12-Feb-16 10:40:23

I think it's cool to share a birthday.
Baby will come when he's good and ready, if you've lost the plug then a good idea to see a mw today if you can. A sweep may be able to get things going. Regardless of the birthday issue you must be wanting baby to make an appearance! Good luck x

Frazzled2207 Fri 12-Feb-16 10:42:30

Ps can you get out of dh's way today, he sounds very annoying.
If he's not at work can you send him out with dd so you can relax a bit.

ItchyArmpits Fri 12-Feb-16 10:47:21

He's reduced his about-to-give-birth wife to tears in case the baby comes at the "wrong" time?

What an arsehole.

flowers and cake and good luck.

MadrigalElectromotive Fri 12-Feb-16 10:48:26

OP did you post yesterday about your DH wanting you to postpone your induction in order to try to get the baby to be born on a specific date? He sounds like an overbearing bully to me. Babies aren't like pizzas - they aren't just made to order and he needs to stop stressing you out about dates and start supporting you properly. Sorry you are going through all of this.

whatdoIget Fri 12-Feb-16 10:52:25

He sounds a right dick. Can you get away from him? Go to your mum's or something. Maybe he should be more careful about what date he ejaculates on in future if he's so bothered weirdo

Artioo2 Fri 12-Feb-16 11:09:57

I would personally rather have siblings with a same-day birthday than birthdays just a few days apart! Have you told him forcefully to stop mentioning it to you?

MetalMidget Fri 12-Feb-16 11:17:48

What exactly is he expecting you to do? Cross your legs? Tell the baby to wait patiently?

FoxgloveStar Fri 12-Feb-16 11:19:53

Tell him to shut the hell up and that he is stressing you out.

dizzylemon Fri 12-Feb-16 11:21:19

Wow your DH sounds like he is being a right bellend. But as others have said, it's possible he's expressing his own anxiety in a very bizarre way.

Not easy to do, but do try and ignore him. I hope you have someone better being your birth partner!

(Not saying he is a bellend, but we're all capable of being rubbish under pressure smile )

VinceNoirLovesHowardMoon Fri 12-Feb-16 11:22:19

Your 'D' H is a total fucking bellend

Duckdeamon Fri 12-Feb-16 11:25:32

V sorry your H is behaving so appallingly and hope you read him the riot act.

Duckdeamon Fri 12-Feb-16 11:26:04

Or perhaps a midwife might do that for you.

VocationalGoat Fri 12-Feb-16 11:27:34

Ffs your DH needs to get a feckin' grip!
My two friends are sisters and it's lovely that they share the same birthday two years apart.

My DD was born on my birthday.
DH and DS1 are a day apart.
We love it!

Stop crying wink! Be strong! You can push a human being out if your body for God's sake. March in their and tell him to stop being an idiot and get a handle on things! Your glorious baby is on the way. But until then keep living life normally. It'll happen when it happens, not when your despot DH dictates.

I've had a stillbirth... Believe me, sh*t doesn't matter after one of those...just come into the world alive and well. That's what it's about. flowers

GoingLoopyQuickly Fri 12-Feb-16 11:27:39

Baby will come when it come. I have a friend whose kids share a birthday and they love it.

Just try to let it wash over you. He is feeling as anxious about things as you are.

Ask your dd how she feels about her sibling being her birthday present.

You are both stressed. Going into your 42 week is a long time waiting for both of you.

VocationalGoat Fri 12-Feb-16 11:28:56

"march in there" not their...forgive my poor grammar.

Imnotaslimjim Fri 12-Feb-16 11:32:27

Some really harsh answers here!!

I agree with brookberry I think he's projecting. He doesn't want to admit he's worrying about the birth so he's stressing over something that you can't control.

It does sound like things are on the move for you, I was very sensitive and tearful before labour started. Good luck.

Sallyhasleftthebuilding Fri 12-Feb-16 11:34:31

I would rather they share than have one a day earlier - takes the wind out of the sails for the second - as they know Aunty has brought X - or they didn't get y - joint parties are a one off to organise - lots of benefits!!

Tell DH to naff off - it's not his choice!!

brookeberry Fri 12-Feb-16 11:35:43

Another thought. My DH says he feels rather helpless, he can't really do anything when to comes to thee actual pregnancy. I wonder if this is his way of trying to gain some control, as misguided as it is.

I also think having the same birthday is rather lovely.

NotSpeaking Fri 12-Feb-16 11:44:38

He's really anxious. Always like this! Like he needs a date to focus on. He did it with our other two also. Crazy because when I'm actually in labour he's amazing. Just the build up to it he's an absolute nightmare.

GoingLoopyQuickly Fri 12-Feb-16 12:06:30

My dp is similar about "events" too. I would just talk to him to let him know you need his help to get through the final pish (so to speak)

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