Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

1 2

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

Whose unreasonable?

29 replies

NotSpeaking · 11/02/2016 10:09

Going to hospital Monday to be induced. I will be 41+6. Hubby wants me to go in on Tuesday so we will have more chance of baby being born on Wednesday (which is his late fathers birthday) I just want this baby out. I just want to go in on Monday and get the ball rolling. He did this with our daughter also, induced on Valentine's Day which he orchestrated. Am I being unreasonable? I don't know how dilated I am or anything. God knows how long it will take. Am I being unreasonable because I don't want to wait one day? I'm worried about baby and the placenter.

OP posts:

Report

KittyandTeal · 11/02/2016 10:12

Until he can carry a baby to 40+7 you decide.

This is where the quote 'no uterus, no opinion' is useful

Houseworkavoider · 11/02/2016 10:13

Yanbu your worries are not unfounded and its your body! Baby might not make an appearance until Wednesday anyway.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 11/02/2016 10:20

This is where the quote 'no uterus, no opinion' is useful

This. A baby isn't a designer accessory, and he sounds like a controlling twunt, tbh. Trying to "produce" a baby on schedule so he can yuck it up with his friends "Oh, look, my baby was born on the same day as my father's birthday / Valentine's Day (btw, she's his daughter, GROSS) / the day my dog was born, isn't that KEWL???" is fucking stupid and petty. He needs to grow up. Tell him to fuck off and act like an adult.

Also, induction isn't an exact science. If the baby isn't out on his specified day, is he going to wheel you into theatre to have a c-section? Please don't let him pull this shit twice, you need to put your foot down.

OhShutUpThomas · 11/02/2016 10:22

Da fuck?

Is he usually this controlling?

Go in when YOU want to go in. I can remember the feeling of late pregnancy and YANBU AT ALL to be induced when YOU want.

Your H is monumentally selfish if he's actually trying to make your labour all about him.

sepa · 11/02/2016 10:23

I personally don't think he is unreasonable due to it being his dad's birthday. If it was to hold off for a football match then it would be different.
However, bring pregnant is uncomfortable so at the same time he should respect your wishes.

OhShutUpThomas · 11/02/2016 10:26

sepa really!?

What does it matter if the baby is born on his dad's birthday? Personally I'd prefer it wasn't, bit maudlin and not really fair on the poor kid to have that hanging over every single birthday.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 11/02/2016 10:26

I personally don't think he is unreasonable due to it being his dad's birthday.

You don't think he's being unreasonable in trying to control the day his child is born so that it coincides with his dead dad's birthday so he has a nice anecdote to tell at parties? "Oh, today is a sad time [sniff] and a happy time [sniff sniff]. I lost my dad but gained a child on this day ... it's a miracle!"

Give me a break.

KittyandTeal · 11/02/2016 10:33

Being overdue is generally safe and I don't mean to worry you but have you shown or spoken to him about possible issues that arise the more overdue you go? Does he understand the implications of going that far over? I'm presuming you are being induced before the 'normal' 40+14 for a reason too.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 11/02/2016 10:35

Kitty OP is being induced at 41+6. That's 42-1.

Thenightswatch · 11/02/2016 10:36

This is so controlling, is he usually trying to control aspects of your life like this? If my DH tried to dictate which day our baby was born I'd tell him he could when he carries the baby for 9 months and pushes it out his fanjo.

I couldn't stand it if someone was trying to make my labour all about them, so selfish.

Gazelda · 11/02/2016 10:36

he is being unreasonable. is he going to sulk if you go in on Monday and have the baby before Weds?

KittyandTeal · 11/02/2016 10:45

Sorry! Duh! Need to read properly!

In that case the worries and risks are slightly higher. Does he understand that?

Red193 · 11/02/2016 11:02

He's being completely unreasonable! Baby and your Health far more important and you could still go into labour before then anyway so does he intend to stitch you up so baby cannot make an earlier appearance??

MadrigalElectromotive · 11/02/2016 11:17

He is BVU. You should go in and get induced when you want to. If he wants to produce babies on specific dates, then he is perfectly at liberty to do so with his own fucking body.

Good luck with the induction.

TriJo · 11/02/2016 11:21

No uterus, no opinion.

5madthings · 11/02/2016 11:24

He is being massively unreasonable,it's not up to him and you may find the hospital can't fit you in on the day he wants as they are often booked up.

WiIdfire · 11/02/2016 11:27

I was induced on Monday, baby arrived on Wednesday. You can't predict it.

Oysterbabe · 11/02/2016 11:29

What a total dick. Health of mum and baby is all that matters. Tell him to get fucked (but maybe in a slightly nicer way.)

outputgap · 11/02/2016 11:31

fuck that, OP.

Is he a senior obstetrician by any chance? No, didn't think so.

SushiAndTheBanshees · 11/02/2016 11:33

I would go out of my way to make sure the baby doesn't share a birthday with a deceased grandparent. How grim.

Also, what Kitty said.

strawberrypenguin · 11/02/2016 11:34

Your DHbis being very unreasonable. Go in on Monday, you are overdue and uncomfortable. Plus there's no guarantee how long it will take anyway!

Noodledoodledoo · 11/02/2016 11:34

I was induced on a Thursday gave birth on the Monday so another one who goes with the you can't predict it!! I was only just 40+1 so might have had a baring!

I would politely ignore his request and point out its you its happening to so he can go along with what you want!!

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

zannyminxoxox · 11/02/2016 11:50

I started being induced on the 2nd and didn't have him until the 6th. Either way I think he is being unresonable and I bet your really uncomfortable to and eager to meet your baby. Start it as soon as you can hope all goes well ☺

WitchSharkadder · 11/02/2016 12:01

I've been induced 3 times and each time gave birth within a couple of hours so there's no guarantee.

Besides, he is BVU and a twat for even trying to persuade an overdue woman to delay birth by even a nanosecond.

longdiling · 11/02/2016 12:04

He is being unreasonable and uncaring. His first priority should be the health of you and his unborn child. I'd actually be very hurt and upset by his attitude.

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.