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Needing legal advice

(14 Posts)
blueluce85 Sun 07-Feb-16 21:45:35

Hi all - I'm 25 weeks pregnant and split from my partner a few weeks ago. We currently aren't even talking but I know he will want to be in the baby's life when they are born. I don't want to do anything to minimise his time with little one or do anything to negatively affect him, I'm just worried he may try to do something to me so I want to be prepared and know my rights....from choosing names, to child support, to access etc. Does anyone have any useful advice or can suggest a good place for me go to get some advice that won't cost the earth?? Thank you in advance!

LouLou030783 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:11:40

If it's been an abusive relationship ur best bet is to go to a lawyer and arrange contact only supervised through a contact centre to start with.

In May 2006 the law changed meaning father have 50/50 parental rights, with regards to naming the baby he can't be on the birth certificate unless he is present, had u agreed on any names before hand? With regards to child support if he can't agree to pay anything amicably then go through the CSA xx

LouLou030783 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:12:30

Citizens advice is a great place to go to for advice xx

blueluce85 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:22:48

Hi - thanks for this. Definitely not abusive, just not a great relationship! We had discussed names before, and originally i had said baby can have his surname but I no longer want that. Can I go to name them without telling him? Or what if he comes but we don't agree on names? I will give CAB a call....great place to start as free smile thank you

LouLou030783 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:33:33

Yeah u can register without his knowledge u aren't married, and he also can't force baby to have his surname maybe u could double barrel it so his names still included.

Even though relationship has broken down can u speak to him once things have died down and try have a convo about it all?

Dixiechick17 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:37:00

When you register the baby you can do this without your ex, but this means you can't have his name on the birth cert.

blueluce85 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:39:11

Well that's what I'm hoping to do but I'm not due til end of May so am going to see if he has the decency to speak to me before then, if not, April I will have the necessary convos with him. Hopefully with baby just around the corner he may see sense! And unfortunately double barrelled won't work...the 2 names sound silly! I was planning on using his abbreviated name as her middle name tho....or 1 of 2 middle names so he would still be included xx

LouLou030783 Sun 07-Feb-16 22:52:45

It's a horrible situation to be in i hope u get it sorted amicably x

blueluce85 Mon 08-Feb-16 06:45:55

Me too....i always wanted it that way and tried to prevent this...but things aren't always in your control are they?!

throwingpebbles Mon 08-Feb-16 07:03:48

Could you try and go to mediation now and get a plan in place? It might take some of the stress out of worrying what will happen

Footle Mon 08-Feb-16 07:40:16

You're worried he might 'do something' to you ?

blueluce85 Mon 08-Feb-16 07:50:17

I'm not sure if he would agree to mediation, but its worth an ask. And Footle I mean regards to custody etc....i don't want to be away from my little girl any more than I need to...

sepa Mon 08-Feb-16 08:05:02

As your having a girl I would probably go for his surname and have your name as a middle name - usually women change their surname when they get married but would keep their middle name (just a thought)
Chances are, if you have more children then would take the dads surname (from new partner) and if ex has more kids then his would take his surname. Least this way your daughter is more likely to have the same surname as some of her (potential) siblings?

LouLou030783 Mon 08-Feb-16 08:13:09

Blue Defo understand i went through a messy breakup when dd was 2 it wasn't easy x

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