Advanced search

Any 1st time mums planning a home birth or had one?

(32 Posts)
cheekstime Thu 28-Jan-16 10:09:39

Hi .... just wondered what your thoughts are about it, any concerns and why you decided?

Much thanks x

mmmminx Thu 28-Jan-16 17:22:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mmmminx Thu 28-Jan-16 17:23:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cheekstime Thu 28-Jan-16 17:56:37


Yes really want to home birth, this is my first too 18wks right now.

Just read some stuff earlier about half of mums that have their first at home go in hospital in the end and that the baby is slightly at more risk on the stats, scary but I still want to have it at home.

I'm going to ask the MW why this is, why hosp in the end, less likely to happen with second. If it's physiological may make me reconsider but if because 1st mums are likely to be more anxious, I think that wouldn't be a factor with me, just the standard worry smile.

Or is it that the only second time mums that homebirth were the ones with great pregnancies the first time round/

I would be a lot more confident if I was as close as you to hospital. I'm trying to move at the moment, which is a pain so unsure just how near I will be. 30 mins currently and everhwere else I look for a home looks the same.

I'm like you, a midwife unit could swing me if I was far away. Really don't want that hospital experience at all!!!!

I'm going to hypnobirth and rather be in own home. I'm a natural sort of lass. I think it's a beautiful experience and feel I don't want to have this in the hospital, I'm not ill I'm pregnant!

Also hope for a lovely MW. I have come across a weird one recently that has put me right off but the private ones are how much!!!!? £2000-£3500.

Homebirth as you know more likely to have same midwife. If I move area I won't have to worry about the weird one but if stay I will have to say I don't want her treating me any longer. How awful is that, v stressful.

Fifi10 Thu 28-Jan-16 18:07:08

I'm also trying to have a homebirth for my first, although I know it's a long journey to get this.

I have found the homebirth uk website to be a really useful resource, loads of relevant research included (even if the website looks quite home made and dated)

mmmminx Thu 28-Jan-16 18:24:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HTKB Thu 28-Jan-16 18:56:26

I did! Was just ten minutes from the hospital. It was fabulous and I loved it.

I am/was a midwife, on our homebirth team, so I had an insight into what it might be like and wasn't at all scared. That helped, I think. I kept a completely open mind and would have been happy to go in if I'd needed more pain relief.

One thing I did do was get all the tools I possibly could. I didn't want to be thinking "if only I'd had/done x, I wouldn't have had to come in (to hospital)". So I had a birth pool, TENS, birth ball, music, nice smells, nice food, did perineal massage, OFP, natal hypnotherapy etc etc.

I had a six hour labour which was one of the best experiences of my life. An awful lot of that is luck, but still, I was pleased to be at home.

AliceScarlett Thu 28-Jan-16 20:05:30

I'm TTC, but I've got my heart set on planning a HB, I know it might not happen or I might have to be transferred in the middle. But I feel (after a lot of research) that it is the best option for me. I'll take the mlu though if I have to. Anything but hospital really!

ThePowerOfCake Thu 28-Jan-16 21:42:07

I had a home birth with my first and am planning one for this time around too.

It was definitely the right choice for me. I dislike hospitals and find that my pain is strongly influenced by my surroundings. I could see a hospital birth being and unpleasant and scary experience.

My main concerns were around potentially having to transfer in due to complications or a need for additional pain relief. I felt I had to justify my choice to family, friends and complete strangers who thought it was ok to judge and criticise!

In the end I had a good birth, 2 midwives and a student stayed with me for hours and I saw my usual midwife the next day at home. It was lovely going to sleep in my own bed with DH and our new baby in the bedside crib.

Feel free to pm me with any questions smile

Dumdiddlydum Thu 28-Jan-16 21:50:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

daisydalrymple Thu 28-Jan-16 22:05:45

I planned one for dc1, but was 11 days overdue and baby back to back, so it was advised I go in.

I planned one for dc2, but 2 hrs in when my waters went they were stained with meconium, cue ambulance transfer in and DH having to follow at break beck speed (if midwife present and attending, then a transfer has to be by ambulance in our area)

I didn't bother planning with dc3, he arrived 3.5 weeks early anyway grin - all 3 ended up being back to back, and not an issue for home delivery by itself I should add.

Best of luck, I hope you get to have the delivery you wish for and albus straightforward.

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 10:06:42

Hi Fifi10 thank you for website & good luck with your journey smile

Understand what you mean there mmmmimx that’s interesting and reassuring, all the v best smile

That is so lovely to hear HTKB. Fascinating to here of the experience you have and your take on homebrith. I hadn’t thought of throwing the kitchen sink at it, sounds good. It’s so lovely to hear you had a great experience, exactly what I hope it will be smile

Hi AliceScarlett sorry unsure what TTC is. I’m listed as high risk at the moment because of previous conditions so I don’t know for sure at this stage also. I feel as strongly as you do about it though and very much planning for one. Good luck with your journey smile

Wonderful news ThePowerOfCake, that’s what’s on my mind having to transfer as emergency. Sounds absolutely lovely & THANK YOU! smile

Dumdiddlydum…thank you so much for sharing, I find it really reassuring to hear and help makes me that much braver! smile

Thanks for sharing daisydalrymple….great to hear everything went well and makes me realise that noone really knows until the time. Something I will hope for but I 'shall play it by ear'….or tummy more like smile

Thank you everyone! You have all really opened my eyes to this and def made me look at this in a full way. I’m feeling pretty positive about it now and that much braver. Congratulations to all of you and your babies too! and good luck to your second time arounds and us 1st timers. Right watch this space ahhhhhhhh xxxxx

mackinnonka Fri 29-Jan-16 12:02:19

Hi OP, I am pregnant with first, 16+5, and hoping for a home water birth...we shall see!

I am planning to get as prepared as possible a bit like HTKB mentioned and also doing some hypnobirthing stuff so hopefully that will help. Also thinking about a doula but need to see what the general practice/response time is for the MW in my area and see if I think it would be helpful.

I've had a few people say that so many first timers aim for home birth and then it never happened for whatever reason, but every pregnancy/birth is different so I am going with the 'this is what I/we would like' mentality rather than what statistics say. Hoping that being low risk and generally not to apprehensive will swing it my way in the end smile

Best of luck to you!

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 12:34:51

Hi mackinnonka,

I've bought the NCT hypnobirthing CD's for homebirth 4xcds, which has a one CD which can be started now (I'm coming up 19wks). The rest are for later on down the track. I think this can also compliment any 'real' hypno course later on.

I've only heard great things about doulas smile. Incredible (dare I say) 'stats' (snore) of reduced intervention, by quite a margin.

yes certainly not letting the doubters put me of at least aiming for this. It's great you're low risk & to hear yet another mum to be going for this! We can do it! smile.

I don't think my high risk issues will be an issue at the time so hope I get the offical branding of low risk, coming nearer to the time x

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 12:35:47

all the v best on this journey! mackinnonka

Pteranodon Fri 29-Jan-16 13:10:10

I did, it was great, and much safer than my second birth, in hospital (because induced) where my husband couldn't get any of the extremely busy midwives to believe I was in active labour. At home I had a midwife.

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 13:50:37

o gosh pteranodon, yea another gd reason towards homebirth, must have added to stress. Just great to hearhome birth was pref out of two...thank you!

soundsystem Fri 29-Jan-16 14:31:30

I had a home birth for my first, and am planning another one for my second!

Like cheekstime I was a bit concerned by the high rates of transfers to hospital for first timers and researched this a bit more: as mmmminx says , they're mostly not emergencies. A lot of the time, it's women who decide they woud like more pain relief than is available at home. So I went into it with the idea that I'd labour at home as long as possible, and if I felt I'd be better off in hospital then I'd transfer in, but in the end I didn't want to.

The main consideration for me was distance/travel time to the hospital in the event of emergency. I'm really close to felt comfortable being at home as I could have got their quickly if needed.

Like HTBK I had everything ready I thought I might need: beanbag, birth ball, snacks, boiled sweets (I'm not sure why I thought labour would require boiled sweets: I don't even like boiled sweets!), lots of biscuits for the midwives (who didn't eat a single biscuit between them!), a dressing gown.. in the end, I used precisely none of it but I felt much better having it there!

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 14:52:21

That's absolutely brilliant to hear soundsystem. smile cracked me about the boiled sweets, love it. thank u x

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 14:53:52

actually like you're going on a the boiled sweets, that's the cutest thing out. Happy bumping x

soundsystem Fri 29-Jan-16 15:21:35

Haha I never thought of it like that before, like going on a journey!

Dungandbother Fri 29-Jan-16 16:57:16

Just my perspective
I tried to have my first at home.

It was all going swimmingly. Until the midwife wouldn't let me pee in my birth pool.
So out I got and it all went to pot.

Baby was back to back and the midwives did nothing. No advice no help no checking of baby position. They made lots of tea.

It got so bad I had to be ambulanced in. And baby still didn't make an appearance for 6-8 hours. It continued to get worse and I had an epidural and ventouse.

But only found out baby was OP at birth. Would have thought that me screaming about pain in my bottom would have given the midwives just cause to offer some help.

So. Do what you want. And know the back up is there if you need it.

Dungandbother Fri 29-Jan-16 17:00:36

Oh meant to say, my second labour which wasn't back to back barely hurt. grin seriously in comparison to first it simply didn't hurt.
However I ended up with a section as he was breech.

Never got my planned home birth. Gah.

cheekstime Fri 29-Jan-16 17:34:02

Dungandbother...feel for your pain what with MW's wondering which biscuit to go for next. Really good to hear your story on this, thank you. For you to have c section with second wow. Yeah good plan'S the way forward.

I've been looking into pools & have started to realise the limitations of them. I didnt realise no wee. Congrats on your two little monkeys smile

Runningupthathill82 Fri 29-Jan-16 18:34:47

Ok, this is going to sound like a silly question...but when you get towards the end, how do you not wee in the pool?!

I've used the hospital birthing pool in both my labours - had to get out in the early stages with DS, but DD was born in there. I get how in early labour you're aware of what you're doing enough so as not to wee, but at the pushing stage surely whatever is going to come out just comes out?! It certainly did with me...

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now