Explain to daughter

[Heavenscent86]

How do I explain to my nearly 9 year old daughter how the baby got into my tummy? I want to be honest but not scare her with far too much information for her age or something.

[QueenMolotov]

To my almost 7yo, I said that Mummy has an egg and Daddy has a seed, called sperm. Mummy and Daddy have to get really close and have a special kind of hug for the egg and sperm to meet. When they mix together, that is what makes a baby.

Hth?

[LillyBugg]

Doesn't she already know by 9?? I think I'd be honest with her. She's old enough to know.

[Shirkingfromhome]

Could you go the library or look online, there's lots or age appropriate books you could use to help you.

Congratulations too

[NerrSnerr]

What does she know already? I would tell a 9 year old the truth, she'll be doing it in school before long anyway won't she?

[AnnaMarlowe]

I'd be fairly surprised that she didn't know by 9yo.

I told my DC when they were 5 yo (the asked).

I was just very matter of fact and told the truth.

They weren't scared (why would they be) and asked a few technical questions about quite how it worked.

Just stick to the basics.

[Heavenscent86]

Hi she doesn't know already as rightly or wrongly (I don't know) I thought I would wait until she either showed some signs of development or some interest in growing up and how babies are made which just hasn't happened until recently. I had started to think that I would have to just discuss it with her whether she was asking or not when she started to ask about the baby so really it's the perfect opportunity. I'm just not quite sure how to explain it to her. I did find the book what's happening to me? By usborne which I thought might be good. Does anyone know if it's suitable for her age group? Thank you for the congratulations shirking.

[Runner05]

I bought the "lets talk" sex education book for my 8 year old dsd and then sat and went through it with her (she was already showing signs of the start of puberty so we wanted her to know the fact)
It covers absolutely everything from how babies are made and grow, sex, puberty and emotional changes in a matter of fact way while still being gently enough not to scare her and it was a really good experience for both of us to sit and read it and discuss it. It answered all her questions and she kept the book to look through and read on her own.

I know a lot of people don't believe in teaching children the biology of sex and reproduction until they're much older but let's be honest, if you don't speak to them while they're young they will learn it all from movies and TV before you get a chance.

[QuietWhenReading]

Heaven no criticism meant - I was just surprised she hadn't heard it discussed on the playground.

This is more or less what I said: grown up women have very tiny eggs inside them in their ovaries (showed them rough area) and every month an egg gets ready to make a baby.

To make a baby you need a little part of the Mummy(the egg) and a little part of the Daddy, which is called a sperm and looks like a tiny tadpole. Sperm live inside a man's testicals.

If a couple want to make a baby the man puts his penis into the woman's vagina and millions of tiny sperm rush out into the lady and start swimming towards the egg. This is called having sex and is only for grown ups. It feels nice for grown ups and they often do it to show they love each other.

The sperm have a huge race to be the first one to reach the egg and because they are so tiny it's a long way.

The winner reaches the egg (which although tiny is much much bigger than the sperm) and wiggles inside it and that is the start of the baby.

It grows and grows into a baby, kept safe in the lady's tummy making it get bigger all the time. The baby can hear inside the tummy too.

When it's time for the baby to be born the lady pushes the baby out of her vagina. This is hard work and can take a long time and is therefore called 'labour'.

After the baby is born the lady's tummy slowly shrinks back to where it was before.

Of course although an egg gets ready every month, not every lady wants to make a baby every month. In that case the egg comes out of the lady's vagina with some blood (which is just her body tidying up) and this is called a period.

Most girls start their periods when they are teenagers and it is part of becoming a grown up woman.

Obviously this is fairly simplified but my then five year olds followed it well and asked lots of follow up questions. We emphasised the "only grown ups" bit and a few different ways of course.

[Heavenscent86]

Sorry quiet. So easy to misread things on here especially when you are a bit hormonal and touchy anyway. I was also surprised that she's not heard things st school and asked before but she genuinely doesn't seen to have a clue so I do need to sit her down and have a proper talk. I'd rather she hears the facts from me. That's a really good explanation though. I think I might use that or something similar as a starting point and then she can ask any questions she likes afterwards.

[QuietWhenReading]

I think you are quite right to want to make sure that she has the proper information, I feel the same way myself, remembering what nonsense gets spouted in the playground from my own school days!

Good luck with it.