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Can't sleep-the to do list is overwhelming!

(24 Posts)
Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 03:42:55

26 weeks-I woke up at 2 this morning and I can't sleep for thinking about how much we have to do before the baby comes. We've got decorating to do which will involve possibly sleeping downstairs for a week, I've got so many things to order and sort out and I really don't know how we'll get it all done. I'm just venting really confused hoping everybody else is sleeping well!

3luckystars Mon 04-Jan-16 03:46:31

Can you write them down. It won't seem so bad on paper, it's just the whirling around your head that's making the list seem out of control. I am awake too so can keep you company.

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 03:54:43

I am awake - contemplating a very large to do list as well.

I am many years ahead of you - 3 grown up children, sandwich generation etc etc. The long to do lists never change. grin

I had HG throughout all my pregnancies, so my lists never got done. We did all survive though!

If you are awake and worrying, get a pen and paper and write it all down. Put things in order of priority with a start date and deadline and a note about how long the task will take. Consider whether you can delegate anything or get help with anything.

If you list things on here, you will probably get lots of practical advice.

On line shopping saves so much time - we didn't even have computers when I was having my DC; with a bit of planning you should be able to order stuff and get things delivered all in the same week.

What have you got to do?

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 04:07:51

Thank you both!
We have plastering to do in our room and the babies room- DH needs to knock the old plaster off one wall in our room before we can get it done.
Some sanding and varnishing of wooden window frames.
I need to buy and have a new hob fitted.
We need to paint and decorate babies room, ours when it's plastered too! Both rooms need laminate/carpet fitting too.
We're being given a pram (unless it doesn't fit in our car) so I need to go and see if it'll fit and if not I need to buy one that does!
We'll need to build up the cot (not as urgent I know but it's currently disassembled in our living room and our house is incredibly small!)
DH sanded the wooden beams in our house and they need finishing off ideally as fumes/dust etc won't be good for baby!
I've to order blinds for 3 rooms (black out for 2).

What stresses me out the most is how little space we have and where were going to put furniture whilst rooms are being done I think. I was getting so annoyed lying in bed because DH is fast asleep seemingly without a care in the world and I feel as if I'll never sleep again! I know it all seems cosmetic but it's things we wouldn't be able to get done with a baby in the house due to space issues!

Sorry that's as essay sad

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:26:58

Blinds in a box (£25 for 6 from amazon) are fantastic, take minutes to fit and you can leave them up for ages. Mine have been up for 2 months already because I can't sort out my new ones until next month.

Measure your car boot space then look up the make and model of the pram and check the measurements. You will still need to physically try it, but at least you will know straight away if it definitely won't fit.

Is your DH doing the work himself? If so, get him to write the schedule and stick to it. Get your bedroom done first, before you get to the stage when you get too uncomfortable to sleep anywhere else.

You will want the baby in your room to begin with so get that sorted - will you put the cot next to your bed?

As long as all the plastering and sanding is done, the decorating of the baby's room can be done last. (My third baby didn't even have a room until she was a year old).

If your kitchen doesn't need any decorating, get your hob sorted now.

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:30:20

You can do a lot, even with furniture piled in the centre of the room and covered with plastic and dust sheets. You have to do one wall at a time and move stuff round.

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 04:31:45

Thank you 3littlefrogs! I think it's the fact the DH is doing some of it himself (not the plastering-we have someone for that) and he just doesn't seem to have any sense of urgency about it. I really don't want to nag him because he works 55 hours a week but a lot of it is work I physically can't do myself now! It's also that once we're sleeping downstairs it'll be on a mattress on the floor and I'm worried I won't be able to get up once I'm down! I'll order a hob today and organise fitting and I'm going to look at those blinds now! Xxx

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:37:11

Get the black out ones - they really do work.

Does DH have a mate that can help? If he arranges time with a friend/relative he is more likely to stick to a plan. You shouldn't be moving furniture, so he should get another pair of hands sorted.

Could you afford to just get a decorator in? It might be worth it to get it done quickly.

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:42:26

Make sure you have a safe method of tying up blind cords when you get your new blinds. They are really dangerous around babies and toddlers.

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 04:44:42

My brother could come and help him-I'll ring him today and see if he can help! We can't afford a decorator-DH used to work for a well known decorating company and is really capable when it comes to decorating but he's the king of procrastination - it took him 2 years to finish our bathroom! He's a lovely man but very easy going xx

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:49:30

Good idea.
My son and his friend did a lot of decorating/tiling for me - they enjoyed working together and I bought beer and curry for them every day! I think DS would have got bored/distracted left to his own devices.

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jan-16 04:53:51

Right. I am going to go back to bed and try and get a couple of hours sleep before I have to get up for work.

Hope you feel a bit better now, Champagne. You have a plan of action.

Good luck.

SaltySeaBird Mon 04-Jan-16 04:55:54

I'm 28 weeks and haven't slept through the night in weeks! We've done nothing for the baby yet but as she/he is DC2 we have lots of stuff in the loft but it all needs finding / sorting / cleaning and I've no idea where we will put it.

I can't sleep though as so worried about work. Have been off with me ever since I said I was pregnant and no idea how maternity leave will pan out but will be shocked if I'm still employed there in a years time ... Lie awake stressing about it every night.

mayaknew Mon 04-Jan-16 04:58:14

Oh OP I'm the same ! I'm 35 weeks and I've been awake the past hour worrying about all the things I have to do. And money is extremely tight this month so I'm not even sure we can afford to do it all.

I've been thinking about getting my hospital case packed but there's still some things I need to buy that I'm not sure I can until DH gets paid ... 5 days before I'm due sad

I think if you get started on your list this week you could have it done before you're too pregnant. Is your DH plastering the walls himself ?

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 05:03:46

Thanks 3littlefrogs!

Salty that's terrible about your work-legally they can't just get rid of you because your pregnant-I query about what I'll do work wise when I'm due back. My job and support system don't fit around nursery hours particularly well and ft nursery is really expensive so I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I just keep focusing on my little baby and having faith that things will sort themselves out one way or another where work is concerned!

Maya the money thing really gets to me too. A lot of what I need to do I can't afford to do until payday but that's 4 weeks away which will put me at 30 weeks and even less capable of doing what needs to be done! What do you need to buy? Xxx

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 05:04:59

Maya no we're having a plasterer do it-just waiting on him getting back in touch really which doesn't help because I have no timeline to work with where that's concerned! Xx

SaltySeaBird Mon 04-Jan-16 05:38:46

No legally they can't but if a company wants to get rid of somebody there are ways. And they can make life difficult and miserable in the process. I won't be the first person to be outed due to pregnancy.

Just hate it so much being in this position.

mayaknew Mon 04-Jan-16 05:55:49

I have everything for the baby but I have nothing for myself so need to get pj's toiletries nursing bras pants pads etc. I know they sound like cheap things but they all add up , and money really is that tight.

Do you have the plasterer booked in?

mayaknew Mon 04-Jan-16 05:57:13

Just saw you are waiting on him . Hate relying on workmen and you have to plan around them . It really is so disruptive.

sepa Mon 04-Jan-16 08:07:27

This was me at about 26 weeks also. After I had decorated babies room the list didn't feel so bad anymore. We still have bits to get but they will be done at some point (hopefully before this one gets here)

Hope you managed to get some sleep!

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 09:43:47

Maya I know what you mean about the little things adding up-I feel like I'm constantly putting my hand in my pocket at the moment! Do you have a Boots card? If you join the parenting club you get extra points and vouchers etc which might help a bit for nursing pass etc?

Sepa I came back upto bed about 5 and DH asked why I was up so I told him-I think that it helped just passing some of the worry over (that's awful isn't it?!) to him and I'm hoping it's made him realise how little time we have now! So I've just had a few more hours thank goodness!

Artandco Mon 04-Jan-16 09:50:44

Remember baby should sleep in your room the first 6 months at least. And many stay in parents room much much longer.
I would be tempted to close babies room door and sort that in a years time. Saves time and money and stress for now.

ALR123 Mon 04-Jan-16 11:29:08

Hi OP. I feel your pain, we moved house when I was 24 weeks pregnant. We'd bought it before we even knew about baby and it was a long chain so took forever. What annoyed me was the encouragement we got from everyone to continue with the move as everyone offered their help with moving and then also doing up the new house which did need a lot of work.
In reality, my mum helped us move and everyone else vanished into the woodwork!
at this point we'd not even started baby shopping and I felt like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders as i was also holding down a full time job as was my husband.
I walked into work the one day and just sobbed and sobbed and sobbed because I felt like my head would explode. My colleagues all took an hour from their day and we sat and wrote down my (huge) to do list and to-buy list.
We prioritised certain rooms in the house, allocated jobs to my husband and then they sat with me while I did a mass internet order of baby stuff.
One colleague also then contacted my husband via Facebook to tell him that she was concerned about my stress levels and she wanted to make him aware of how bad things had got.
that was 4 months ago now and my baby is due next week.
We have managed to decorate the hall, stairs and landing, nursery, living room and dining room.. We've re carpeted the whole house and lived in chaos at times.
We've had some weeks where we have got home from work and literally not sat down till we've got into bed.
everything off the baby list is bought and my hospital bag is packed.
I have also found time to batch cook and freeze some meals
I guess what I'm trying to say is that as horrible as it all feels at the moment, if you can try and organise yourself you won't feel like you're in a massive hole for long but most importantly try and pass some of the stress onto others! You can't do everything and stress is really bad for the baby.
I'd end up writing to do lists for my husband every night, even down to he was loading the dishwasher and mopping the floors but it was a huge weight lifted, otherwise I'd be thinking all the time "I've got to do this and I've got to do that".
things will get better, promise! Good luck

Champagneformyrealfriends Mon 04-Jan-16 20:59:18

ALR123 I don't think I could cope with a move right now! It's how little space we have that causes me anxiety really-I have a cot in my living room at the moment! But we'll sort it I'm sure! My DH seems a bit more on it today-he was worried that I'd lost sleep over everything! Thank you for your reply-I bet you're so excited with just a week to go! Xx

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