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Avoiding suspicion

(14 Posts)
BeckyNW Mon 21-Dec-15 21:05:03

My parents arrive tomorrow to stay with us for a week, including Christmas Day. They have no idea we are TTC and I have no idea if I am pg (tests BFN so far, AF due Christmas Eve). On the phone my parents have gone on and on about what wine they are bringing, and delicious cheese (you guessed it - Brie, blue cheese, unpasteurised Cheddar for some reason). Any advice on ways to gracefully keep them off the scent? I don't want to do anything to risk the baby if by some miracle I am pg, but I really don't want my parents to know as it may well never happen and I don't want to get their hopes up.

fieldfare Mon 21-Dec-15 21:10:58

Until you know you're pg surely you'd just eat and drink as normal?
We've been ttc for 8 years, I'd have gone mad in that time if I couldn't have had a rare steak, blue cheese and a glass of wine.

April2013 Mon 21-Dec-15 21:14:41

I'd have food poisening and not want to eat or drink anything too rich, say you have been on just dry toast and plain rice this week and come xmas eve be tentatively trying a mince pie, xmas day you can face a xmas dinner but nothing too rich (cheese and wine) drink a lot of water obviously and say you are wanting to make sure you don't get dehydrated.

Notrevealingmyidentity Mon 21-Dec-15 21:19:58

You might not even be pregnant ! Just eat as normal.

Jibberjabberjooo Mon 21-Dec-15 21:21:18

Honestly? I'd eat and drink as normal. I conceived on holiday, was eating the wrong cheeses, meats, drinking wine every night. Found out I was pregnant about a week later. I didn't stop eating and drinking anything whilst I was TTC.

Do a test Christmas Eve, if you're pregnant just avoid these things and make sure you have alternatives out too. Are they really going to notice? I think the more you draw attention to it the more people will notice. Have a glass of wine on the go and just slosh it around a bit.

Potkettleblack2 Mon 21-Dec-15 21:25:12

I second (or 3rd) just eating and drinking as normal. I went off alcohol (but would have still eaten all cheeses) for the 2nd week of my two week wait for a number of months. Surprise surprise it was the month we decided to relax (and drink what I want) that I got my BFP.

candykane25 Mon 21-Dec-15 21:32:17

Most people don't know they are pregnant at first and drink and do all sorts you are not to suppose to until they find out try are pregnant.
My first Christmas I sipped mulled wine to stop nosey people asking questions and I was about 8wks gone.

Kaytee1987 Mon 21-Dec-15 21:38:33

I would just eat and drink as normal, you would find out you're pg around 2 weeks after conceiving for about the first week the fertilised egg isn't even implanted and for quite a while I don't think you share a blood supply so nothing could be passed over anyway (can someone confirm if I'm right there, don't want to give bad advice).
Take a test Christmas eve if that's the day your AF is due.

Junosmum Mon 21-Dec-15 21:39:38

Until you know just enjoy whatever they bring!

BeckyNW Mon 21-Dec-15 21:50:00

Wow, first time posting on mumsnet and how helpful are you lot?! Thanks so much for your swift and reassuring replies. I have actually felt much better for laying off the alcohol and caffeine anyway so don't really want to get blitzed. Think I'll just sip slowly and enjoy in moderation :-)

glueandstick Tue 22-Dec-15 12:18:24

I'm 7.5 months pregnant and shall be eating as normal with the odd small glass of wine. Just enjoy it. I didn't find out until about 9 weeks over which time I had many boozy evenings and eaten a whole sheep/cows worth of unpasteurised cheese. I feel people are a little too cautious about everything these days and as long as you're sensible you should be fine. A well respected cheese manufacturer v a dodgy kebab van, a glass of wine v a five day bender... All about moderation including moderation itself.

ohidoliketobe Tue 22-Dec-15 18:29:19

I alsp suggest just eating/ drinking as normal. I went on holiday to Italy between conceiving and doing a test for my (100% fit and healthy) DS. Drank and ate my body weight in wine, cheeses and meats.
Worth a check on NHS pages anyway
As not as many types of cheese as you might think are recommended to be avoided - for example current guidelines are thay all hard cheeses are ok, even when made with unpasteurised milk. So if you get a positive and follow guidelines to tterletter you'll be fine with Stilton amd cheddar from unpasteurised milk.
Good luck either way! I'm TTC my 2nd and AF due boxing day, my cycle has been all over the place and I'm not even going to do a test until new eats and eat and drink what I want until then if no AF (however cramps today would indicate I'm out this month..)

prettyflowers111 Tue 22-Dec-15 18:43:06

I just found out on Thursday and Sunday had a pre ordered family meal, all 26 of the family! Well for starters I'd ordered the pate and there was no way I could change it without raising suspicion so I just went with it, and it was delicious! In my mind I told myself that I wasn't even due af until Saturday and so most people suspecting pregnancy would give it a day or two unless ttc so if I hadn't tested so early I wouldn't have even known! It's the risk of food poisoning that's the danger, and personally I've never had food poisoning in my life! Things are produced, stored and manufactured/cooked to such high standards these days that the risk is very minimal. As for the wine perhaps claim to be visiting a friend and therfore will be driving later on.... just pop to the shops and say say they weren't at home! If you want to be super careful then go with the previous suggestion of food poisoning before they arrived!

BeckyNW Sun 27-Dec-15 20:32:35

Well the parentals finally left today. I have had a total of 5 glasses of wine over the last 5 days. I managed to leave the unpasteurised cheese in the fridge every time we got the cheese out and then, well, mum & dad may as well take it home with them as it's unopened and we have so much food in the house. Still no AF and still BFN so no idea what's going on, but at least I've had an enjoyable Christmas. Thanks everyone, and a happy festive season to all!

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