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Probable miscarriage sensitive - dates question

(13 Posts)
Helgathehairy Sat 05-Dec-15 13:53:01

I'm sorry, this might not be the right board but I'm not sure where else to put it. This is sensitive as I need to include a few details but I'm going crazy with this going around in my head and I need to know what someone objective thinks.

I had my first pregnancy scan on Thursday. Based on my dates I thought I would be 11 weeks but baby was only 7 weeks 6 days. It was a standard scan, not transvaginal. Consultant came into the scan and asked were my periods regular (not really - range from 28 to 44 days) he pointed out there was no heartbeat, no blood flow to the baby and no movement. He concluded the baby had died and then talked to me about what happened next.

Now to the dates. LMP was 14th September and I thought I'd conceived on 26th September. (We are TTC so certain about the date). It was only after I got home and looked at a diary I remembered we'd also had sex on 11th October.

Is it crazy to think I might have conceived on 11th October and the baby is ok for size? Or is all the other scan results (heartbeat, blood flow, movement) an indicator that the baby is gone.

I asked to think about my next step so I have a few days to think.

I'm sorry to ask here but it's easier to type and have strangers think I'm crazy than say it out loud. And I don't mind if you do say I'm crazy - I just need to get this thought out of my head.

ThePug Sat 05-Dec-15 14:07:28

Helga I'm so sorry you're going through this. If the embryo size was 7+6 I'd have thought they should have detected a heartbeat if all was well and it was growing, so unfortunately it looks like you probably did conceive when you first thought but things stopped progressing.

I take it you haven't had any bleeding or sign of things going wrong?

For reference, I had a mc in April this year around the same dates as you. I fell pregnant again two cycles late and am now 26 weeks. It is a totally shitty thing to go through (I ended up having ERPC) but I promise you'll come out the other side.

ThePug Sat 05-Dec-15 14:08:35

Oh, and there is a board on here with lots of useful info and support www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage

FishWithABicycle Sat 05-Dec-15 14:14:22

I have no idea whether it's possible from a scientific point of view, but when something similar happened with me, I had to have a second scan a week later to check there hadn't been any growth before they would proceed with any if the options for managing the miscarriage. So sorry you are going through this. flowers flowers

wellthatdidntgotoplan Sat 05-Dec-15 14:22:06

I'm afraid I don't know about dates. But I do know that for your own sanity in the future you need to resolve this before you do anything else. Can you go back to the consultant and explain what you have here? Is there anyone you can ask for advice sooner - an early pregnancy unit maybe?

Helgathehairy Sat 05-Dec-15 14:22:12

thepug that's what I thought but I read a few things saying a heartbeat is always detected before 8 weeks on a normal scan. I haven't had any spotting or cramping.

I had a previous miscarriage in August at 6 weeks.

fish the hospital haven't mentioned another scan and am wondering if I should request one even though it would be difficult to see again it would put my mind to rest.

Because I haven't naturally miscarried I'm considering an ERPC and want to be SURE.

Helgathehairy Sat 05-Dec-15 15:03:57

Sorry - not always detected

Eastend2015 Sat 05-Dec-15 17:10:28

Always a good idea to request a second scan. I had a MMC in Feb and they did a second one as a matter of course. I think it's worthwhile just to put your mind at rest. I found the hospital quite pushy trying to make me go through a ERPC and I just wanted to take my time and make sure. The miscarriage association were really helpful. Wishing you lots of luck- it's a shitty place to be xxx

Helgathehairy Sat 05-Dec-15 17:56:01

eastend the hospital actually have been really good. They haven't pushed a particular course of action at all. I think I'll call tomorrow and ask about the possibility of a second scan.

Eastend2015 Sat 05-Dec-15 20:58:46

Good I wouldn't have thought it would be a problem to get one then, good luck!

Helgathehairy Mon 07-Dec-15 13:52:13

Called the hospital today and I'm having another scan on Thursday. An internal one. Then if it shows the same as the first I'm going to have the D&C that day.

Eastend2015 Mon 07-Dec-15 13:54:53

Everything crossed for you!

Helgathehairy Mon 07-Dec-15 16:41:02

I've accepted that the scan is going to show the same thing - I just can't get my hopes up. But at least I can go ahead with the D&C knowing for certain that there was no hope.

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