Advanced search


(61 Posts)
whattodo89 Thu 03-Dec-15 19:47:05

I'm going to post this in a few places because I am after as much advice as I can get. Please don't flame me, I am feeling horrendous enough as it is.

I am almost 7 weeks pregnant by a man I have known for a few months. He lives an hour away so I have only seen him at weekends so it is fair to say we are as good as strangers.That said he has been very supportive, would support my choice whatever I decided.

I have been undecided until now. I want an abortion. HOWEVER... I have a 7 year old who overheard a conversation between my friend and I. He realised I was pregnant and is now completely over the moon.

I kept telling him it's not a baby it's a seed but his mind is set, he's constantly rubbing my tummy, talking about 'our angel', wanting to know how the be the best big brother etc. He has wanted a sibling desperately for years. He is amazing with babies and incredibly loving towards them. He told me this morning finding out about the 'seed' is the best thing that has ever happened to him. He keeps asking how many days until it's born and going into details about what he'll do with it.

With that in mind, I don't know if I can do it. The guilt in terms of my little boy would be over-whelming. He is so very sensitive and still cries regularly over his pet who died 2 years ago.

Now I know it sounds mad to consider keeping a baby for the sake of not upsetting my son, but I honestly feel like it would be incredibly traumatic for him to believe I lost the baby or the seed did not grow.

Please please help and please don't flame. I hate myself for not being more careful about my son hearing. What a mess.

goodnightdarthvader1 Thu 03-Dec-15 19:48:50

No one can give you an answer, I'm afraid. It's your life.

LineyReborn Thu 03-Dec-15 19:49:55

This about you. End the pregnancy if that is what you want to do, and do it quickly as possible.

There are plenty of MNers who have done this with no regrets.

Best of luck.

pullofthemoon Thu 03-Dec-15 19:50:23

Don't worry too much. There's no way you could or should go through with a pregnancy you don't want because of your DS.

TrinityForce Thu 03-Dec-15 19:56:17

What an awful situation for you to be in.


I just wanted to add support for you, OP. I have no advice. Best of luck, take care of yourself. xxx

sepa Thu 03-Dec-15 19:57:11

Who is to say that you wouldn't MC anyway. If you want an abortion then you could sit your son down and say the baby didn't make it. You need to make this decision for you and not for your son. If you want children then this could happen in the future when your more stable

TonySopranosVest Thu 03-Dec-15 20:02:14

How would you explain a miscarriage to your DS? You would probably say something like "sometimes the seed doesn't grow properly and doesn't become a baby, and this has happened to my seed this time."

Just use this sort of language to explain why there won't be a baby.

I think you might benefit from really considering whether this termination is something you want to do though, as your reaction to your son's excitement is a little unusual.

Louise34567 Thu 03-Dec-15 20:33:06

It's of course your choice. But your reaction makes me think you could have it
the baby. If that's the case, you have a supportive future partner which is wonderful, and a son who'd be thrilled to grow up with it. Best of luck xx

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:04:54

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Azulejo9 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:21:31

That is a vile reply, you should be ashamed of yourself "your username 1- 10"

Mrsunders86 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:25:54

Wow don't hold back will you!! Reported your post as it is crazy.

No advice for op, not sure what I would do in your situation flowers

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:26:10

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Mrsunders86 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:28:59

No one is a murderer, I personally wouldn't have an abortion, however I am pro-choice. I think your words are vile and there are much better ways to get your point across than going off on a hate filled rant.

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 04:32:18

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

buddhasbelly Sun 06-Dec-15 04:33:05

Yeah your off back to crazyland now...reported

Nanofone Sun 06-Dec-15 04:35:00

OP please don't listen to this vile abuse. You are the only one who can make this decision, but you have every right to do so.

Cerseirys Sun 06-Dec-15 04:36:03

Maybe get this moved to pregnancy choices OP? Hopefully it won't attract anymore trolls.

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 05:00:43

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 05:02:01

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Cerseirys Sun 06-Dec-15 05:04:01

What are you on about? The pregnancy choices board is exactly where this post should be as its a different board to just pregnancy. Time to head back under your bridge perhaps?

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 05:29:10

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

sepa Sun 06-Dec-15 05:32:31

Wow. Someone stepped off the wrong stop on the crazy train. I think you missed your stop back in the dark ages.
I bet your the type of person who thinks being gay should be punishable by 50 lashes!

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 06-Dec-15 05:35:32

Obviously reported.

Back to the OP... I have been undecided until now. I want an abortion. If you are sure, then an abortion is the right choice. If you are undecided, why are you? What is affecting your choice?

yourusername12345678910 Sun 06-Dec-15 05:36:41

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

merrymouse Sun 06-Dec-15 05:57:14

Please sort this poster out asap!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now