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why am I not excited about pregnancy?

(12 Posts)
HarrysMummy17 Thu 19-Nov-15 01:37:59

I'm 14 weeks pregnant. I've had a scan so we've seen baby but I'm not at all excited. I don't feel pregnant. I forget about half the time too.

Is this normal? With my first pregnancy I was forever touching my belly and talking to baby.

madsaz76 Thu 19-Nov-15 08:37:33

I'm in my first pregnancy. It felt very abstract right up till baby started kicking. Now feel more involved and chat to bubs all the time. I think that there are loads of possibilities why you might feel differently.

CuppaSarah Thu 19-Nov-15 08:58:11

I think this is really common esspeicaly in subsequent pregnancies. I mean you already know what becoming a mother is like so there isn't the same level of mystery. Plus you have your older child or children to worry about, as well as potentially work, a home to run, all the everyday family stuff. There just isn't the time to feel all wistful and awe struck, nor the headspace to get your mind around such an abstract concept. I'm 34 weeks with dc2 and I still struggle to accept the wriggly thing in my massive belly is a baby.

I don't think it's a bad thing either, it certainly helps the time go quicker!

mmmuffins Thu 19-Nov-15 09:11:32

I'm 32 weeks into my first pregnancy, and I feel nothing towards the baby. I have been wondering how common this is.

It does make pregnancy, and all the pregnancy chat, much more tedious when you aren't excited about your child and their impending birth at all.

Pollyputhtekettleon Thu 19-Nov-15 09:19:09

Totally normal and very common. Don't worry about it. I'm always like this too.

Parpaltunnel Thu 19-Nov-15 09:22:59

I'm always so relieved when other women say this - I'm 22 weeks into my first and I'm kind of... neutral. Have been doing lots of nesting type things but just don't feel at all connected with it at the same time, and can't really believe I will actually have a baby. In my case it's almost as if I can't let myself get too excited in case something goes wrong...

Everythinggettingbigger Thu 19-Nov-15 12:34:16

13+2 into 2nd pregnancy and although im excited im not at the same time, ive even been feeling babs move, lots of butterflies and pokes and although it puts a smile on my face I'm still no where near as excited as first time round. My first was the first for both mine and my DPs families for at least 18 years so EVERYONE was excited, this time round my DMIL has just lost her dad who was a big part of the family and for my parents this will now be there 7th grandchild with number 6 being born last week, its just not the same this time round plus having a 5 year old to look after, running a house, working full time, the focus isn't all on the pregnancy. Hoping this changes soon as my DS couldn't be more excited which is lovely! had my scan on Tuesday and wasn't even that bothered about taking a pic home (didnt help that babs didn't want to trun round and show us its face so all pics are from the back), having a sexing scan on 22nd December to surprise families on Christmas Day, I feel like I should be a lot more excited about this as I am.

You aren't alone smile

GothicRainbow Thu 19-Nov-15 12:40:20

Both myself and DH have been feeling the same. I'm 22 weeks into my second pregnancy and have only really started to feel slightly connected to the baby. Finding out the sex and also choosing a name really helped with this.

Excitement hasn't really happened this time around for anyone - my DS1 was the first grandchild for my parents so there was a lot of excitement. DS2 will be grandchild number 4.

We are also not in an ideal house to fit a family of 4 with a house sale falling through so that's just adding to the stress!

jamtartandcustard Thu 19-Nov-15 19:30:13

I'm 36+3 with dc4 and not bothered in the slightest. I find that as we've not found out the gender it's been really hard to imagine what he/she will be like and to be excited over that. Can't even get excited over finding out the sex as between us we already have 2 girls and 2 boys (I have 1 step-dc) so either is a bonus.
And besides, what is there to be excited about with pregnancy, labour and childbirth. It's all horrible wink

Iwantvino Thu 19-Nov-15 21:25:46

I never really bonded with DS while he was inside. To be honest I wasn't 100% I had made the right decision. However, within a few minutes of seeing him and holding him I was smitten smile don't stress, not everyone is the same and we're not all the type to get gooey over bumps.

HarrysMummy17 Thu 19-Nov-15 22:08:18

Thanks for the comments. I'm feeling a bit better about it now.
Mil is desperate to tell people and I'm refusing to right now. Immediate family and close friends know but that's it.
I think it's partly due to not knowing how ds will take it. He's a very clingy mummy's boy who doesn't go to nursery yet so we're always together.

brokencrayons Fri 20-Nov-15 09:49:58

Don't worry, 39 weeks with dc3 and I've never bonded with my bumps. Xxx

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