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Facebook and baby photos

(21 Posts)
Cnmorgan13 Wed 18-Nov-15 18:41:45

Just curious what the general opinion is. I only use Facebook for the websites etc that I've 'liked' to keep up to date on. I rarely post about myself (no pregnant photos, no scan photos). Everyone has that Facebook friend who posts their whole life. I for one (and my husband) won't be posting much if at all in the way of photos of the baby when it comes. However my dad and DH mother tend to post a lot more than us. Is it weird that I wouldn't want any photos of my child on Facebook?

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Wed 18-Nov-15 18:43:35

I think it's a bit weird, but it's your choice!

WheresMyBurrito Wed 18-Nov-15 18:46:15

Not weird at all. Just make sure that everyone is briefed on what you want. If you don't want them to post photos of the baby online then they should respect that.

Cnmorgan13 Wed 18-Nov-15 19:01:39

I guess it all stems from about a couple of years ago. A guy I vaguely knew from work (we speak on the phone occasionally) added me on Facebook. He and his Mrs had just had a baby girl and she posted multiple photos every day, tagged the father in which meant I (a complete stranger to her) had access to all her personal photos of her child. I didn't think it was appropriate for me to be seeing them so I unfriended the guy. What made me feel really uncomfortable was If I had 'liked' any of her photos, all my 'friends' would be able to see it and on and on It goes. I know privacy settings have changed since then

CultureSucksDownWords Wed 18-Nov-15 19:03:56

It's probably the less common choice, but I also don't post any pictures of my child on Facebook, and ask that my family & friends don't post any either. So I don't think you're being unreasonable. There are many ways to share photos privately with your family if you want to.

Snowflake16 Wed 18-Nov-15 19:06:19

I don't think it's weird at all. Just had my 12 week scan today and me and DH don't want to post anything on Facebook, our reasoning is that people you see/ talk to regular will already know and the others don't need to know. I think my MIL would like to post something but I've asked if she does, not to tag us.

Jenijena Wed 18-Nov-15 19:09:58

I put a photo of my ds on Facebook generally once every six to twelve months, in recognition of distant family. A few more in the earlier days. I don't think you're being unreasonable at all; our children are growing up on an age that wgatever their future, prime minister to criminal, it's possible that the 'cute picture of them sitting on the potty' becomes public property. And I don't like that. Also, check facebook's t&cs closely; fb could close tomorrow and delete every photo stored on there. And more sinister things.

BooOzMoo Wed 18-Nov-15 19:13:12

My family all live 230 miles away ... Just put fb on lockdown!!!

Champagneformyrealfriends Wed 18-Nov-15 19:46:40

I'd be pretty pissed off with my parents if they'd posted my whole childhood on a website. Luckily it wasn't an option! Upto you-I personally won't be. I think it's very strange that people do really.

Stylingwax Wed 18-Nov-15 19:51:04

I keep culling my Facebook of people I haven't spoken to in years. I'm 8 months pregnant but haven't posted anything about it and by the time I give birth I'll probably have taken off anyone who wouldn't have known other than through Facebook!

KeyboardMum Wed 18-Nov-15 19:56:11

It's not weird at all. I have never understood why other people feel it's necessary to post their lives online for everyone else to scrutinise.

It's a common thing, nowadays, to befriend a person you have met once at a social event and Facebook has purposefully made removing friends into a chore. When you do remove people, they suddenly bombard you with messages and make you feel like a bad guy. As a result of this, a lot of people end up with a friends list pumped full of random acquaintances.

Also, because of the terrible privacy controls on Facebook (and by the way, you can't even delete your account anymore, only deactivate it), you can never be too sure who is looking at your photographs, your basic information and where you reside. Even the random acquaintances of your closest friends and family could be viewing your information. Do you really know anything about these people? Are they safe? Do they deserve to stare at your baby photos? Or half-naked pictures of you exposing your bump? Do they really need to know when your baby is due? Or which hospital you are having your baby at?

Personally, the thought of some random staring at my pregnancy details/ pictures makes me feel very uncomfortable.

Also, don't forgot that, although it's your baby, the infant is in fact a mini human being. Do you really want them initiated onto a social network like Facebook from the early years of their life? It's like baptising a child and making them Christian when they don't have the ability to choose whether or not they even want to be a part of a religious community.

RoTo72 Wed 18-Nov-15 19:57:58

Iv photos of ds on fb. But my privacy is strict only friends can see my posts and no one can tag me on photo without my agreeing, (and iv unfriended so many ppl in this past few months). In saying that iv said nothing about being pregnant and have no intention of doing so either. Iv family working in Korea and others in Donegal, Canada and Dublin, so handy to keep in touch The last photos of ds were of r holiday in June. I don't tend to post anything personal. Just stupid funny photos etc. And most of my friends iv either known a lifetime or r from an autism support group. Still the v v few iv told r rl, not fb friends.

Skiptonlass Wed 18-Nov-15 20:51:53

Not weird at all. Anything you put on FB is effectively out of your control and in the public domain. The amount of personal / compromising stuff people post is staggering.

I do use it - I live abroad and have moved around a lot so for me it's a great tool to keep in touch with people.

I'd also make sure that people you're friends with know your choice too. We didn't want any of our wedding pics on FB so we just asked people not to post them - no one did,.

Buttons23 Wed 18-Nov-15 20:59:08

We don't have one photo of our son on Facebook and he is now 2. We just don't see the need and photos can easily be sent privately in emails to family members. I did get one Facebook friend tell me I shouldn't be ashamed of my child and that she was sure he was beautiful in his own way hmm

Never had a problem with others, they know how we feel so they just don't post photos of him either.

sepa Wed 18-Nov-15 21:20:43

I don't think it's weird. Nothing pregnancy related has gone on my Facebook and I have a few friends who will speak about their kids but never post photos. If you don't want pics up then make sure everyone knows. I think it's weird people put them up personally. I didn't grow up with my face all over the Internet and neither will my child

Bejeena Wed 18-Nov-15 21:45:09

I chose not to out photos of our son on Facebook although the grandparents do post the odd one or two and whilst I rather they didn't I don't insist they don't do it but then on probably only 2 pictures a year and nothing inappropriate

Fleurchamp Wed 18-Nov-15 21:55:35

I didn't announce my pregnancy or my DS's birth on Facebook - I'm just not one for big announcements on there.

I also haven't uploaded any photos of DS. I worry about how much we share online - potentially that cute photo of DS in the bath could be linked to him forever. I think it should be his choice in the future to decide what he wants posted online.

Having said that, some of my friends have posted photos of him --without asking--but I just untag myself.

Oysterbabe Wed 18-Nov-15 21:57:36

It's not weird.
I'll post the odd one that I think are particularly funny or cute but not spam the place with loads.

StepfauxWife Wed 18-Nov-15 22:01:11

I don't think it's weird. I have about three photos of my 2.5 YO DD on Facebook. I do have an Instagram account with a smaller number of followers that I am happy to share photos with - about 20 close friends and family.

There's also an app called Lifecake - it allows you to upload photos and videos and share with a limited number of people. A nice way of sharing photos with those that are genuinely interested in seeing them.

Congratulations by the way!

ffauxlivia Wed 18-Nov-15 23:32:34

One friend of mine set up a secret Facebook group for pictures of her kids - it was for close friends and family only, or anyone who wanted to see those pictures. So it avoids annoying people who don't want to see tonnes of baby pics, plus means you can feel secure that only the select people can see anything - any comments or tags they make in that group are not seen by anyone else outside the group at all. They can't share the picture, but I guess there's nothing to stop them taking a screen grab or something, so you would have to trust everyone in the group!

Also, I think you can change your general privacy settings to be on the highest so only friends see things, and not their friends, even if they comment etc. However the one thing (I think) is really hard to avoid is either profile pictures or cover pictures - not sure which one but I'm pretty sure it's impossible to avoid the public seeing one or both of them. so just make sure those 2 pictures are ones you would be happy with non-friends seeing!

Kaytee1987 Thu 19-Nov-15 12:39:53

I don't think it's weird to not want pictures of your child on the internet. I don't think I will either and would be furious if someone put one up without asking me first x

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