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(5 Posts)
Helsbelsx Fri 06-Nov-15 16:25:33

Hi.... I've been with my boyfriend 14 months, everything is fine with us and I found out I was pregnant Tuesday. We sort of live together and been full on from the start, he has a 3 year old daughter who I adore and look after all the time including taking her on holiday etc.

Anyway found out I was pregnant Tuesday... MASSIVE shock as I'm on the pill. Told him and his reaction was not what I expected at all.... Said it wasn't the right time I should have an abortion... Next day he was saying whatever I choose is fine he loves me more than anything... Next day he's saying he doesn't want it I shouldn't have it if he doesn't want it etc. discussed why and he said we can't afford it (we have a joint income of £75000 and live comfortably). He also said that if we split up he would have 2 kids my 2 different mum.

I want to keep it... I'm 26, got a good career, two degrees and lots of friends and family. He doesn't and is being not very nice. He has however said if I have it he would love it as much as his daughter (and I would do the same).

I don't know what to do... Are reactions like this common? He's just reacted so horribly and I thought he'd be fine because we are happy and settled. Is 14 months too early? Help ????????

Wishfulmakeupping Fri 06-Nov-15 16:32:09

I wouldn't say his reaction is normal but I'm not an expert.
You need to think about you having a baby right now and how the situation will be for you and the child as your bf is not looking reliable or dependable.
Would you want to do it alone?

Helsbelsx Fri 06-Nov-15 16:38:57

I know... He's an amazing dad to his daughter and has her most of the time so I know he would be there for me but his reaction has really put me off. But I don't want get rid of it either. So confused.

lemon101 Fri 06-Nov-15 16:45:13

Well, that sounds unpleasant. To be honest, I read this and I think it sounds like you want this baby. If that is true and as pp said you are prepared to go it alone then he sounds like he is pretty immature and you need to make it clear to him that you are going to keep the baby and its up to him if he's in or out.

I would be really pissed off if my dh reacted like that.

It is a big deal to elect to become a single mum and 26 is young (take it from an oldie!). It isn't that straightforward a decision I suspect.

Helsbelsx Fri 06-Nov-15 16:51:02

Hello thank you. I really can't believe it, he is not that kind of person whatsoever! I'm in shock. I'm about to go and tell my parents but my mums recently been diagnosed with cancer and I cannot expect them to help.

I'm lucky that I'm financially secure enough to do it but like you say it's a bit choice, but I really cannot comprehend an abortion I think I would regret it forever.

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