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Everybody lies about pregnancy!

(49 Posts)
macdat Fri 16-Oct-15 19:34:14

What are some things you found out during pregnancy that nobody tells you about?

Before you ever get pregnant, people make it sound like it's all sugar and flowers. They dont tell you about weird stuff like itchy nipples, weird discharge, vivid dreams and all the weird things that go on with your body. When you're sick in the first trimester, they lie and say you'll feel better at 12 weeks.
And i was horrified when I realised you have to also push out a placenta after all the hard work of labour haha confused
And I found out your hair thins a few months after the birth?!
I know so many mothers, I'm fab with babies and kids, but clueless about the truth of pregnancy.

So second, third, fourth time mothers, enlighten us first timers. I want to know the truth about what to expect, not just "oh it's so wonderful when you finally hold your baby" or about the so called pregnancy glow.

IndomitabIe Fri 16-Oct-15 19:37:55

Being handed a baby is weird. And then they leave you with it unsupervised and you're supposed to know what to do.

Sometimes that "rush of love" doesn't materialise, (though you later realise you love it anyway!)

Pregnancy isn't always as heinous as your first experience. I can't believe it's possible to feel so good and be pregnant jinxed it

Jeffreythegiraffe Fri 16-Oct-15 19:38:43

It does vary, there's no one way of feeling or doing things.

I was surprised at how swollen I was down below, I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't even feel to wee, so I didn't and had to stay in hospital!

LumpySpaceCow Fri 16-Oct-15 19:41:39

Each person and pregnancy is different. The only difficult things I have found in mine are pelvic and back ache towards the end and tiredness. Other than that I felt as normal as I ever was!
Btw, you hair only thins because you get extra hair in will not go bald!

TheOriginalWinkly Fri 16-Oct-15 19:42:34

Everyone experiences differently. My friend had a dream pregnancy - no sickness, neat bump, shiny hair and glowy skin. Her baby obligingly arrived 9 days early just as she was getting a bit fed up. I, however, felt like shit the whole time; I was sick and only wanted to eat cheese and onion crisps for weeks, exhausted, dry skin, insomnia, anxiety, heartburn, SPD, and oh so fucking HOT all the time. Having a newborn was a piece of piss in comparison smile

TheOriginalWinkly Fri 16-Oct-15 19:43:24

Oh and DD went 8 days over and I was so swollen I could only wear flip flops for the last 2 months.

Impatientwino Fri 16-Oct-15 19:43:35

When you're finally left alone with your beautiful baby and he's silently asleep in the little goldfish bowl crib thing do not ignore the midwife when she says get some rest and then sit and stare and wonder at the marvel of life you have just brought into the world for hours. Just as you decide to get some sleep the little marvel will have then had enough sleep and wake up and want to feed for the next four hours confused

dlwelly Fri 16-Oct-15 19:51:28

The pushing part is not how it is one one born every minute (I.e. A 60 second segment of labour that gives you a baby after a few pushes). 4 hours later...

AuntieStella Fri 16-Oct-15 20:00:24


MrsB1988 Fri 16-Oct-15 20:00:32

Funny one I found that no one told me...after ds was born still had really bad pains I said to the midwife "when is the afterbirth going to come?" She laughed and said its been and gone about ten mins ago...."why do I still feel like I'm in labour then?"....oh they are after pains they get worse and last longer with each child. shock anyone waiting baby number two though....I survived nothing to be scared of. Which reminds me a friend said to me did you have your waters broken?...yeah...was it horrendous? I've got a mate who said it was absolute agony blah honestly I didn't even feel it....--I was in too much pain with the contractions to notice!-- Any ladies pregnant for the first time our bodies are designed for childbirth it's not the most pleasant experience but you will feel amazing at the end of it. I read a book called the good birth companion I found it really helped calm nerves...but only if your a booky want to know every detail about everything type.

Lj8893 Fri 16-Oct-15 20:04:37

My bum was so sore after childbirth. I think it was from tensing it for so long during contractions, and then pushing down into it when pushing dd out. Took about 12 hours for my bum to stop aching.

PosterEh Fri 16-Oct-15 20:07:19

My placenta sort of flopped out, didn't really have to push it.

I was lucky that with both of mine the pushing side was like "one born". Dd flew out in one push (I'm going to be honest and say that a baby exiting at lightspeed can also have its downsides though...).

MrsBartlettforthewin Fri 16-Oct-15 20:11:26

That your fingers get fat! shock I did not know this until I couldn't get my rings off during my first pregnancy, now I wear them on a chain.

The indigestion and the heart burn after you eat anything.

How undignified it is being check by the midwife during labour and afterwards.

Other than that it's pretty awesome grin

ThreeFrazzledFandangos Fri 16-Oct-15 20:16:54

you don't push out the placenta do you? I had the injection and don't remember having to do much.

Although once they gave me the baby I didn't really focus much on anything else.

Lj8893 Fri 16-Oct-15 20:27:41

I had the injection but still had to kind of push the placenta out, with the midwife pushing and rubbing my tummy to encourage it out. It was actually very uncomfortable and painful!

Dixiechick17 Fri 16-Oct-15 20:29:18

Didn't have the urge to pee for about three months after giving birth, had to make myself go, but would sometimes be eight hours before I remembered.

Swollen bits, legs and ankles swollen up to the size of tree trunks no matter how much water you drink or rest you get.

Changing underwear twice, sometimes three times a day.

Constipation... No one warned me how bad that would be.

How big your boobs will be once the milk comes in!!!! Felt like Dolly Parton for a few weeks until they calmed down.

Cluster feeding for hours.. .

Sorry most of mine are post pregnancy.

I had to push the placenta out, despite having the injection... In fact I pushed and the midwife pulled... Joint effort...

That no matter how many pillows you have in your bed you will never be comfortable and the chances of a full nights sleep are slim to non.

Towards the end you may need help sitting up in bed if the baby likes laying in your ribs.

Dixiechick17 Fri 16-Oct-15 20:30:07

Oh and leg cramps every night!

Champagneformyrealfriends Fri 16-Oct-15 20:47:50

"Don't worry Champagne, you'll feel great after the first twelve weeks. Full of energy!" LIARS! All of them.

cherrylola Fri 16-Oct-15 20:58:28

Discharge, bloody loads of it sometimes confused
Heartburn and acid, especially in the middle of yoga.
Restless legs keeping you awake at night.
A really hairy tummy.
Swollen feet.
Great hair until 30 weeks then blurgh, lank and thin.
Baby kicks and twists can be bloody uncomfortable, on the verge of painful at times!

SmashleyHop Fri 16-Oct-15 21:00:13

That if you use enough lotion/ baby oil/ stretch mark cream you can keep yourself from getting stretch marks.... Liars!! You either get it or you don't.. It's pretty much down to how elastic your skin is.

That you may shit in front of people. Nobody told me that as I had my first. I think I cried from embarrassment for 10 minutes after.

SparklyTinselTits Fri 16-Oct-15 21:04:47

My cousin is one of those people who you just know she was born to be a mother, and she is amazing at it. She glows with every pregnancy and relished in that was what I expected.
I hated every second of being pregnant. I was sick for almost the entire duration, my skin looked like the surface of the moon, my feet swelled to the point where the only thing that got were my gym trainers. My midwife kept telling me "you're going to be one of those people that finds being pregnant worse than actually giving birth" and boy was she right.

3littlebadgers Fri 16-Oct-15 21:06:15

That despite what the books say, stillbirth is not rare. When I lost my little girl earlier this year so many of the hospital staff told me, I guess to make me feel better, 'it is more common than you think.' My daughter was born on the 12th of the month there were three, in my hospital alone, before me that month. I was low risk, she was perfectly fine, as was the placenta and cord. They found no reason. I wish I knew how common it was before I went through it, maybe I would have picked up on it sooner or not felt like such a failure after.

cherrylola Fri 16-Oct-15 21:08:21

Oh, and i forgot about the bookers vivid dreams!!

HixieRice Fri 16-Oct-15 21:11:25

That I would suddenly have far more saliva than I needed sad
That my ankles would swell up so much I was scared they would burst!
That I would feel 'normal' for a fraction of a second upon waking up every morning, and then feel like shit again for seven and a half months! (the first month was even worse)

Jeffreythegiraffe Fri 16-Oct-15 21:23:42

The constipation after birth was horrific.

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