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Just miscarried, should I try again?

(11 Posts)
Mcgieml3 Wed 12-Aug-15 18:52:56

Hi, I miscarried for the first time this week (after a healthy DS). I was ten weeks and we had seen a heartbeat on an earlier scan so I'm pretty shocked and sad. Feeling pretty horrendous after the surgery. Don't know whether to try again straight away, what if it happens again?

Littleoakhorn Wed 12-Aug-15 19:03:48

I miscarried my first pregnancy and of course worried like mad for the whole of the first trimester with dc1. I don't know that waiting will necessarily help with that. What waiting might help with is just giving yourself a break from the emotional turmoil of ttc, pregnancy hormones, worry etc.

Hugest sympathy for your loss thanks

winkygirl Wed 12-Aug-15 19:03:55

I was in this position 8 years ago. Healthy DD, conceived second baby fine but lost baby just before 12 week scan and had to have surgical procedure as didn't miscarry fully. We waited for a normal period then tried again.
DS is 7 years old so all fine very soon afterwards.
Wishing you all the best as I remember it being a very sad and anxious time xx

sarkymare Wed 12-Aug-15 19:36:43

First of all I'm very sorry for your loss OP. Do you have support at home? I hope you're taking it easy and being kind to yourself right now.

Now, that sounds exactly like my experience. I had multiple early scans all showing a heartbeat but I sadly miscarried at almost 11 weeks anyway and had to have an emergency removal as the foetus got stuck in my womb.

I did TTC straight away and fell pregnant 6 weeks after the MC. I'm now 31 weeks pregnant with another boy and everything with baby is looking perfectly fine and healthy.

Miscarriages are very common and happen in around 1 in 4 pregnancies. You having just had a miscarriage does not make any future pregnancy more likely to end the same way.

PS my 16mo DS was also conceived after a MC. Just two weeks after to be precise. He too is as healthy as can be.

Brummiegirl15 Wed 12-Aug-15 20:16:20

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've had 3 mc's in a row so I know exactly how you feel.

All I would say is try and wait for your first period so you give yourself time to recover and grieve. Trust me I know that knee jerk "I need to be pregnant NOW" feeling.

Waiting until your period will help your hormones rebalance and give you a starting point for dating a future pregnancy.

If you feel you can't wait, you MUST wait to get a negative pregnancy test before trying again.

Too many times I've seen the heartbreaking distress of women on these boards where they've desperately tried again straight away. Got a positive test and actually they aren't pregnant it's the hormones still in their body and they are heartbroken.

I got a bfn 1 week after my first mc, 2 weeks after my 2nd and took 4 weeks after my 3rd!!!! sad

Please just take a deep breath, take a step back and just give yourself at least time to get a bfn before starting again.

I know it's hard but please remember every single pregnancy is genetically different. A new egg, new sperm, fresh lining. Your chances of a successful pregnancy next time are just as high as if you never had an mc.

I'm so sorry though. Please look after yourself flowers

WendyTorrance Wed 12-Aug-15 20:21:22

flowers sorry for your loss, OP.

I have had 3 miscarriages and 2 healthy DC. My last miscarriage was in between having both of my children. I conceived DD2 straight after the third miscarriage without waiting for a period. I had a healthy (but worrying!) pregnancy and baby.

I suppose the only advice anyone can give is to try again when you feel ready.

Best of luck.

Topsy34 Wed 12-Aug-15 22:03:09

I had da 6 years ago and then a mc in January. We decided to let nature take its course and i fell pregnant after a period the following month.

You are more fertile after a mc, doctors say you should wait a few cycles, but that is just for dating purposes, unless you had a difficult mc

notascooby007 Wed 12-Aug-15 22:36:08

I miscarried my 3rd baby it was such a shock after 2 healthy babies. It was a year before I decided to try again I wasn't ready before that. I suppose everyone is different, I struggled after the miscarriage and decided to wait til I knew I'd be strong enough to deal with it again should the worst happen again. 4th pregnancy ended well but those early weeks were hell with worry and uncertainty. Only try again when your mentally able to cope with it all

MissSMartin Wed 12-Aug-15 22:46:02

so sorry for your loss thanks xx

Luckyfellow Wed 12-Aug-15 22:46:39

Sorry you are going through this. I have experienced this and have had 2 babies since with no problems in either pregnancy. I would say it is definitely worth trying again and again if needs be. Try not to panic if you don't get pregnant again straight away. Your hormones will be all over the place. Be kind to yourself.

Mcgieml3 Thu 13-Aug-15 15:48:01

Thank you so much for your replies. Still feeling awful. Hearing your stories has made me feel a bit better. It's good advice to not panic. I'll maybe see how I'm doing in a week or so and go from there.

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