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Does this feeling go away?

(6 Posts)
Wildflower91 Sun 19-Jul-15 16:43:19

I feel like a horrible, evil person for writing this but I feel like I'm at the end of despair. I'm 13 weeks pregnant with identical twins and for the last week, the reality of this situation has sank in and I keep telling myself that I don't want to be pregnant any longer. My boyfriend left me when I was 6 weeks pregnant and there has been no contact, I feel so alone in this world and like I have nothing to offer these twins. Everyone tells me how lucky I am but I can't share their joy, I can't tell family or friends how I feel because everyone is so delighted with the news-decorating the nursery and buying presents already, I feel so ungrateful but I just have no interest. I feel like I'm too young and when I see pictures of my friends out at the weekend and in happy relationships I just can't shake this feeling of bitterness and jealousy. I'm aware of how ungrateful and selfish I sound but I just think I will be a terrible mother, has anyone went through something similar and it's gotten better? :-(

CalypsoLilt Sun 19-Jul-15 17:06:37

I had very similar feelings to you, I'm sure it's because our hormones are all over the place, with the addition of tiredness and nausea, no wonder we feel crap.

Please try and tell someone in real life; if not family/friends then the NCT helpline or the Samaritans.

Everything you are feeling is normal but please don't hold it all inside x

MummyPiggy87 Sun 19-Jul-15 20:11:42

Deffo agree with above, you should speak to someone in person about this. Maybe your midwife can offer you some help?
Sorry to hear that the father has left, hopefully he'll step up once they are born. You'll never love anyone as much as your children and they'll love you more than anyone will ever love you also, it'll all be okay. thanks

NeuroticFox1 Mon 20-Jul-15 19:15:20

Just wanted to agree with the posts above. It sounds like you need some emotional support and understanding. Relationship break ups are tough anyway so it's bound to make you feel worse when you're pregnant. Get the support you need

HollyBNanny Mon 20-Jul-15 21:09:15

Hi Wildflower,

I am sorry to hear you're finding it so tough and just want to offer my support as I'm in a similar situation! I am 6 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend (well ex) is running scared and I'm in a constant battle with myself because I am terrified and can't feel happy about it.

Can I ask how old you are? How long you were with your ex boyfriend?

It's devastating when you lose that support and everything feels so heavy.

Do you have strong family or friends support? I hear it is very common for us to feel overwhelmed and depressed or anxious anyway so no wonder you're feeling so horrid, you're coping with a tough situation and you would be super human to feel any different right now. I'm feeling so blue and anxious I can't see how I'll get through it! I'm usually positive and try to find the love in all scenarios and situations....

I have been told to find some counselling, have you thought about that?

Let me know how you are! If you need anyone to talk to who knows how you feel, message me : )

You will not be a terrible mother that is for sure, sometimes the people who feel so afraid of failure and scared they are selfish are actually the people who are the most ready with love, it's just hard to love something you haven't even met yet!


MummyBex1985 Mon 20-Jul-15 21:28:17

So sorry you're feeling like this, I can only imagine how hard it must be flowers

My friends husband left her when she was pregnant with identical twins, it was hard but she wouldn't change them for the world and she's a great mum. Do you have any other family for support?

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