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unsure what to do!

(5 Posts)
emmalouise1093 Mon 22-Jun-15 15:41:09

Me and my partner got together when we was 15 and we was both tearaways that didn't go to school and were childish. We had a daughter just before my 16th which my mum has special guardianship custody of. My are now both 22 and he has a good job and my job is Ok, we have a house and cars and are doing well and my daughter stays from fri-sun. She stills lives with my mum due to choice and she is happy and settled. I found out I was pregnant today and told my mum who went crazy! She said it would confuse my daughter as she got older and it wouldn't be fair. I understand where she is coming from but I really don't know what to do. Has anyone had anything similar or have any advice on what to do? I can't get my head straight at the moment. Thankyou

MissTwister Mon 22-Jun-15 16:28:00

I've not been in this situation but I don't think you can put your whole life on hold and never have another child. Do you have a social worker or someone who you can talk this through with as to the best way to deal with it?

toohardtothinkofaname Mon 22-Jun-15 17:01:32

My sister went through same as you; pg at 15, mother at 16 to my niece who my mum adopted. 4 years later she had my nephew to another man & had moved out leaving niece with mum.

My niece had such a great upbringing and because she knew no different, it hasn't really impacted her in a negative way.

Perhaps your mum is worried some extra responsibility is going to land on her? You can't really be expected to have no more kids for the rest of your life. As long as you continue the routine with your daughter I'm sure she'll be fine. Good luck

emmalouise1093 Mon 22-Jun-15 17:31:13

No we haven't had a social worker for the past 3 years. I don't think it is about more responsibility for my mum cause she knows we a more than capable now. I just can't seem to get my mum to support me. I understand she is thinking about my daughter and so am I but I really don't think it will effect my daughter, we live 15 mins from my mum and see her though the week after school when not working and have her the majority of the school hold. So I personally think everything will be OK just wanting to come on here and check its not me been "really selfish" as my mum said!

S2b16 Tue 23-Jun-15 21:36:36

Your not being selfish, you were young when you had your daughter and are involved in her upbringing, if you weren't I would agree your mam is scared shell end up with baby.
Why wouldn't you want another baby? It's not selfish at all. Your daughter might feel a bit jealous when she's older that baby stayed with you when she didn't but not likely if you have a close relationship to her anyway.
Enjoy your pregnancy, hope it all goes smoothly flowers

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