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Still using ex surname and now having a baby with another guy...

(11 Posts)
Cheshirehello79 Fri 12-Jun-15 22:03:17

So I'm in a dilemma - I was married for 7 years and now divorced but kept my ex surname as was quite established with the name and didn't think much of it.

I'm now having a baby with a guy a had short relationship with and ended up pregnant. We are no longer together and I'm thinking of giving the baby my surname ( please refer to my old post not naming dad on birth certificate ). The dilemma is I'm still using ex surname so baby will have ex husband surname.

Do I change my name back to my maiden name or it's not a big deal ? All my scans has my ex husband surname on them and from what I know when the baby is born he/ she will be called ex husband surname e,g baby smith .

Any advice?

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Fri 12-Jun-15 22:05:08

It is your name. You didn't borrow it. You changed your name. Give your baby your name
smile

DayLillie Fri 12-Jun-15 22:05:31

Can you hyphenate your married name with your original name? Gives continuity, but your own name then.

WorldsBiggestGrotbag Fri 12-Jun-15 22:05:39

Call the baby whatever surname you want! Your surname isn't your ex's surname, it is yours now. If you want to use it for your baby then use it, you have every right to. If not, choose something else.

Cheshirehello79 Fri 12-Jun-15 22:14:17

Thanks guys my name is currently hypernated my maiden and ex husbands so I guess should be ok for now

goodnessgraciousgouda Sat 13-Jun-15 09:56:00

I'd say use your maiden name for the bambino, if your last name is currently hyphenated. Later down the line, when you have more time etc, you can always change your name back to the non hyphenated maiden name.

twinsandapenguin Mon 15-Jun-15 13:27:55

Personally I would change my name back and then have the same surname as the baby.

Glindathegoodwitch Mon 15-Jun-15 13:38:07

Wow, I don't even know? The first things I thought were ;

1. Do you have children with your exh and want to keep that continuity between the siblings? I understand that to a certain degree.

2. Are you absolutely certain that you will not give the child's paternal father's name? I do not know your circumstances but I presume this is on a basis of the father not wanting to know/ you wanting him not involved, however, I am sure that growing up, the child would appreciate it's family name and may want connections with the father's family even if not the father.

3. Would your ex husband be a little weirded out that you gave the baby of another man the name that he gave you... Not that it really has anything to do with him, but if it were me, I would feel like I had not cut ties with the exh and not sure that I would want the child to carry his name. I think that it would be hard for a child growing up to understand that too?

I think ultimately, I would revert to my maiden name if I didn't have any children from exh and use maiden name for new baby.
I'm not sure what I would do if I did have children with exh's surname and didn't want to have to explain everthing to them, esp if at tender ages..

Got me thinking!!

Shootingstar2289 Mon 15-Jun-15 16:11:19

Personally, I would change back to my maiden name and give my baby that name! But it's up to you..

Cheshirehello79 Mon 15-Jun-15 21:34:05

Glinda no don't have any children with exh in fact this will be my first child.

What I've decided as my name is double barrel the child will have their name then have the biological dads surname as middle name and my maiden name as surname.

The father is not in the scene so I'm going be single mum which is fine so yeah I think I'll have it that wasY.

Thank you everyone

lexyloub Tue 16-Jun-15 02:47:33

A girl I know gave her daughter her exh surname even though she was engaged to the biological father I found this rather strange

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