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Heavily pregnant and heavily tattooed

(65 Posts)
rubberducky87 Sun 01-Feb-15 09:38:41

This is more of a rant than anything so I apologise in advance! I'm also looking for opinions on what you mums think about this because I was so taken back back by it.

I am now 36 weeks pregnant and pretty massive at this point! I am heavily tattooed (arms, hands, chest etc). I work a restaurant manager and I'm still pulling in 55+ hours a week.

Last night I was in work and I had a couple come in for some food. I sat them down. Everything was fine until they had finished their food and they were paying for their bill. I went to take their payment because we were busy and their waitress was taking an order from a different table. I was being really polite and friendly asking them if they had any plans for the rest weekend etc and the woman turned around to me, not answering my question.

Instead she looked directly at me and "I feel so sorry for that child you're carrying."

I was so stunned. I just responded with "What?"

Her reply: "How on earth do you think you can raise a child looking like that?"

I couldn't say anything I was so shocked. I just turned and walked away from them. I am so upset by this woman's thinking because how I look has absolutely nothing to do with how I raise my baby. I understand everyone has their own opinion but surely saying this sort of thing isn't ok. Sorry it's so long!

seaoflove Sun 01-Feb-15 09:40:30

That's a despicable thing to say. I can't believe they had the gall to say it.

Mind you, I have a friend with cerebral palsy and she was told a similar thing by a stranger in a supermarket.

People can be such arseholes.

ByTheWishingWell Sun 01-Feb-15 09:41:47

What a bitch. Of course it's not ok. Hope you're alright though. flowers

Some people are just dicks. You're a couple of weeks away from bringing your lovely baby home- don't even give her headspace.

littlemissy12345 Sun 01-Feb-15 09:42:26

That's awful. Some people are so so rude. I hope karma is true.

Meplusyouequals4 Sun 01-Feb-15 09:43:41

bless you. that is a horrible thing to say. I can't believe the nerve of that woman.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Sun 01-Feb-15 09:44:01

What a horrible thing to say! I'm actually speechless at how rude and judgemental it was. Please just try to put it out of your head. She was outrageously rude and judgy.

duckbilled Sun 01-Feb-15 09:44:01

I feel sorry for any children in her life who may be influenced by her ignorant opinions!! angry
As far as I am aware my dd has never been affected in any way by having two tattooed parents.
Don't worry op, the majority of the world aren't complete judgemental idiots wink

Eltonjohnsflorist Sun 01-Feb-15 09:44:16

Oh my god, how heartbreaking. She is a stupid, stupid ignorant woman and your baby is lucky s/he won't grow up in such ignorance. I'm so sorry for your upset x

Koalafications Sun 01-Feb-15 09:44:21

I wonder how good she would be at raising DC with an attitude like that.

What a bitch.

flowers for you.

Nolim Sun 01-Feb-15 09:52:40

What a despicable couple.

GoooRooo Sun 01-Feb-15 09:54:26

What a hideous thing to say. You did well to be so professional and walk away - I would've given them a piece of my mind!


hestialou Sun 01-Feb-15 09:54:56

Pity she was a customer! Id be tempted to say something to her. I personally don't like tattoos, but would never comment on others or judge anyone's parenting skills. Woman was out of order xx

Guyropes Sun 01-Feb-15 09:55:20

Had she had a few glasses of wine? I think actually there are a lot of judgemental people out there; mostly they keep their unpleasantness to themselves, but it can all come out after a few drinks...

fattymcfatfat Sun 01-Feb-15 09:58:14

Two words....fucking bitch.

Pointlessfan Sun 01-Feb-15 10:04:38

Take no notice, some people are just narrow-minded idiots. Hope you are ok, enjoy your lovely baby!

Letmeeatcakecakecake Sun 01-Feb-15 10:05:30

What a twat. Please don't think that's the opinion of the minority! It's defiantly not the opinion of myself seeing as my DP is absolutely smothered in tattoos!

Well done for walking away, personally I'd have thrown a drink over her and had her banned from the restaurant.

I'm so sorry you had to experience that ignorance flowers

Gemzybelle Sun 01-Feb-15 10:05:45

What a knob. You are more restrained than me, I would have told her exactly where to fuck off to.

Jesus, are tattoos even that big a deal these days?! Heavily tattooed women aren't THAT unusual anymore. Why do some people still insist on hoiking their tits about it hmm

Letmeeatcakecakecake Sun 01-Feb-15 10:05:57

Opinion of the majority*

PacificDogwood Sun 01-Feb-15 10:10:23

Oh my! shock

You know this is her issue, not yours, don't you?
Imagine living as such a judgemental, narrow-minded person.

I am an old gimmer, I don't have any tattoos and I don't understand the desire to have one (or many grin). I do find them interesting and have at times asked people about particularly striking ones, but I have no idea how whether your skin is untouched by ink or covered in it makes one jot of a difference wrt what kind of parent you are going to be.
Stupid narrow-mindedness however, would worry me in a parent.

I hope you can forget about her as quickly as she deserves to be forgotten.

Fleeceblankets Sun 01-Feb-15 10:11:04

Sorry this happened op! But you know what people are like - if it's not one thing, it's another, and some people will always find something to dislike or criticise.

Fwiw, I am envious of you as I always wanted to be heavily tattooed but never had the opportunity to go through with it smile

LIG1979 Sun 01-Feb-15 10:13:06

What a woman! I hope you ignored her. I think I would have been speechless to such a comment but I would have liked to ask her how she thinks tattoos impact parenting?

I do get surprised at how stupid and prejudiced some people can be.

rubberducky87 Sun 01-Feb-15 10:18:37

Thank you all for your quick replies and support!

No, they hadn't had any alcohol in the restaurant at all. A very simple water and two main dishes and left.

I think I'm just super shocked because I didn't think tattoos were any sort of big deal anymore and how people can still see them as a really bad thing. I do hope this is the last of the ignorance I hear about the way I look while becoming a mother because I am not sure I will be able to hold my tongue next time!

Thank you all again!

sianihedgehog Sun 01-Feb-15 10:20:35

What a raging bitch!

RJnomore Sun 01-Feb-15 10:22:46

I really hope she doesn't have any children of her own, because I would feel incredibly sorry for them, having such a poisonous shrew for a mother.

I would love to see your tattoos!

PacificDogwood Sun 01-Feb-15 10:23:48

Oh, and prepare yourself to be judged about many aspects of your parenting: once a mother, some people seem to take it upon themselves to judge your choices hmmangry

Fwiw, I was judged for being an older mum <shrugs>

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