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Struggling to keep pregnancy quiet as symptoms so bad!

5 replies

writtengems · 24/01/2015 10:40

Just looking for a bit of advice really. I'm 6 weeks pregnant today and am having strong pregnancy symptoms - am sick throughout the day and have severe cramping which has me doubled over and sweating. I've told my parents and had to tell my boss as I've taken time off work. Problem is, I have an 11 year old SD who is very intelligent - she thinks I've had a stomach bug for 2 weeks and she was so worried I've now had to tell her I'm feeling better! I have no idea how I can hide this for another 6 weeks, but desperately don't want to tell the 'lovely' ex wife until I am 12 weeks and we know everything is OK (don't want to cause unneeded agro) and we can't ask SD to lie/keep it secret. Other problem is I've cancelled on so many social occasions my friends are starting to think something's up! Help! Also, don't want to tell friends as we wanted SD to know first!

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weelamb123 · 24/01/2015 10:59

Hi, I was in a similar position. We had to tell ds (8yrs) as I was so so ill and he is a little worried. We til him wen I was about 9 weeks and touch wood everything has been fine. I'm now 14+3 weeks. U know ur own child and if they will be happy and able to handle it then tell them. Xxx

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JennyBlueWren · 24/01/2015 11:01

It might be worth telling people but just saying you want to keep it quiet but aren't feeling well. I know it's ideal to not tell before 12 weeks but it's better than trying to hide it and having people worry about why you're ill. That's why I told my colleagues so early.

Could you afford an early scan so you know that at the present moment all is well before telling?

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dillydollydarling · 24/01/2015 11:45

I'm only 9 weeks and I had to tell my boss several weeks ago as I'm suffering with hyperemesis. I tried to keep it quiet from everyone else at work but they were starting to really worry so had to tell them too.

You may have to start letting people know, just tell them that you want to keep it quiet for now.

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Cornberry · 24/01/2015 12:20

I've been so Ill that I had to tell my boss and close friends really soon and tbh its a massive relief. My OH and I work in the same place and I've been signed off work for two weeks so people were worriedly asking after me so I told him to tell select people in confidence basically to make our lives easier. We also have a lodger we wanted to keep it from until 12 weeks but the sound of me vomiting at all hours could only be blamed on a stomach bug for so long so we had to tell her. The relief on her face made me certain it was the right decison - she said she's been really worried there was something seriously wrong! In ideal circumstances you'd keep it a secret but coping with the sickness is a nightmare as it is - you don't need the extra stress of having to pretend you're fine. It's not fair. I think tell the people you can't avoid telling for your own sake. Good luck xxx

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writtengems · 24/01/2015 13:30

Thanks everyone. I have an early scan in the morning due to the severe cramps, so fingers crossed everything's ok and then maybe we can begin telling people in confidence. Still nervous about telling SD though! She will be so excited but my OH doesn't think it's fair to ask her to lie to her mum. Also ex wife is evil and very pally with his entire family (big catholic family) who are not going to be at all happy about this pregnancy! We however are over the moon, except for having the worst pregnancy ever!