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Please tell me it gets better. Feeling pathetic

(31 Posts)
letitpea Sat 03-Jan-15 20:26:06

Currently 9wks pregnant and feel just bloody awful. Its a long awaiting, much hoped for pregnancy so I know I should feel grateful. But all I feel is exhausted and nauseous. I have lost all enthusiasm for anything at all, and have been ill on top. Keep crying. Back to work Monday (where no one yet knows) and just wondering how the he'll I will manage 12hrs a day out of the house 5 days a week.

I know I know I'm pregnant, its not an illness etc. I just feel awful and keep crying. So pathetic!

Please please resale me with tales of how it all gets better soon.

MarchEliza Sat 03-Jan-15 20:27:33

I felt exactly the same at 9 weeks and for me it really did get better not long after that. I'm now 33 weeks and it's all been fine since the nausea left me. I hope you feel better soon.

perfectlybroken Sat 03-Jan-15 20:29:13

Type your message here

BikeRunSki Sat 03-Jan-15 20:33:33

.Pregnancy Sickness Support.

3littlebadgers Sat 03-Jan-15 20:36:18

It will get better just take it one day at a time, and remember it's all a sign of a healthy pregnancy. I remember with dc1, at around the 9w mark, reading that morning sickness often tails off around 12 weeks, and sobbing uncontrollably that I had 3 more weeks of sickness to go! 31w with dc4 now and I'm loving every minute. congratulations on the baby

mollypollly Sat 03-Jan-15 20:37:13

You poor thing OP, I felt exactly the same-sick and exhausted all day. For me, everything changed at 15 weeks and suddenly I have a huge surge of energy and felt fantastic right to the last couple of weeks. It will get better but don't be hard on yourself for complaining until it does! X

letitpea Sat 03-Jan-15 20:43:05

Thanks everyone. 3littlebadgers that's exactly how I feel. Made all the worse by trying to keep it a secret at work. Husband is so far uncharacteristicly understanding but I am starting to annoy myself with it. Its just not like me. My mother is full of how fantastic she felt when pregnant. thanks mum

Molly 15 weeks. Only 6 more to go. Sob.

Daisy17 Sat 03-Jan-15 20:47:55

Pregnancy is not an illness, no, but the symptoms it causes are exactly like those of a horrible illness!! I never see why this distinction needs to be made! If you had a stomach bug for three months people would be distraught for you. Just because it's caused by something else doesn't make it feel any better. Of course you feel rubbish and you are NOT pathetic in the least! I'm now 19 weeks and feel like a new woman so hang on in there. And if you feel you can, confide in a few trustworthy people at work, it really helps to have that little bit of understanding and solidarity while you're dragging yourself through it. Unmumsnetty hugs and sorry for the rant!

letitpea Sat 03-Jan-15 20:51:30

I did wail that to husband the other day daisy 'If I was ill at least i'd be getting better!!!!'

I havent actually vomited yet, 'just' nausea. I don't want to eat, but feel better if i do. Sometimes. Ugh. Thank you all. FX that the 12wk mark works its magic.

Dogsmom Sat 03-Jan-15 20:53:38

It does pass smile

With my first and this one I felt just like you until 15 weeks, I hate admitting this but at the time I wouldn't have been gutted if my period started as I just wanted it to stop even though they were both planned and very much wanted. It's horrible feeling so rubbish 24/7, I loathed waking up each morning and having to do it again, I could barely lift my head and hated the smell of the dog and the settee!!

You might find you feel a bit better at work with the distraction, try eating little and often and whatever you fancy, don't worry about calories you can deal with any extra weight when you feel brighter, also try and make the effort to get up, showered and maybe walk around the block, even if you feel like it's the last thing you want, a change of scenery and fresh air no matter the weather will do you good.

Each night tell yourself that's one more day done, the end is in sight and the exciting bit is coming, you've got your first scan, then feeling him/her move, then the 20 week scan and all the buying/decorating/planning and then getting to meet them.

needaholidaynow Sat 03-Jan-15 20:53:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

justabigdisco Sat 03-Jan-15 20:55:49

I'm with you OP. I'm 8 weeks with my second. It's the sheer relentlessness of it - as you say, if you were ill you could take a few days in bed and then expect to feel better. Also, my nausea lasts all fucking day (no DH, it is NOT 'morning sickness') and into the night aswell.

DeckTheHallsWithBartimaeus Sat 03-Jan-15 20:57:33

In the nicest possible way, do not pin your hopes on the 12 week mark. I did with DS1 and just felt even worse when nothing improved.

I got better ish around 5 months both pregnancies though still threw up daily for the 9 months...

However I only know one other person in RL who had it that bad. Most women I knew felt a lot better after 16 weeks ish.

cattyf Sat 03-Jan-15 20:59:21

I'm glad to hear it isn't just me who feels like this...It is my birthday today and I felt sick all day. My husband arranged a lovely lunch out and I forced myself to go and try to enjoy it but I felt awful at being such rubbish company.

We had a bit of a struggle getting pregnant due to my PCOS so I feel like I should just be grateful and not complain but I just don't know how I'll get through work on Monday. I have a long commute and just the thought of the train journey makes me want to throw up!!

DeckTheHallsWithBartimaeus Sat 03-Jan-15 20:59:37

But just remembered - int the 9 months I felt the worst at 8-9 weeks. My mum said her worse weeks wre those when she should have had her period IYSWIM.

browneyedgirly Sat 03-Jan-15 21:24:51

I completely sympathise, you poor thing. I felt dreadful around weeks 8-11 with week 9 being the absolute worst. I was completely exhausted and felt nauseous ALL DAY and felt like I would never feel well again. 'Morning' sickness my ass!! For me I felt normal again by about 14 weeks and have (touch wood) been well since then (now 29 weeks). I hope the same goes for you, if not sooner.

DanyStormborn Sat 03-Jan-15 21:32:38

I felt crap from 6 weeks till 12 weeks but the second trimester was easy, feeling huge and uncomfortable now in the third but still no where near as bad as the constant nausea of those early weeks.

athousandsplendidsuns Sat 03-Jan-15 21:45:28

16 weeks was my turning point.....big sympathies...5 to 16 weeks felt like a lifetime of nausea and exhaustion whilst pretending to be fine....but you can do it and it will soon be a distant memory

Littlemissjt Sat 03-Jan-15 21:54:02

Hi letitpea,

I'm also 9 weeks and beyond exhausted. I know what you mean about not looking forward to going back to work on Monday! This will be my first dc so can't say anything helpful like it will get better. Not long until your scan and you can tell people and then they may be more sympathetic at least.

MakeMeWarmThisWinter Sat 03-Jan-15 22:00:46

Huge hugs. I was sick and felt crap from about 7 weeks until 14 or so weeks. I'm now almost 20 weeks and I feel actually human now, although if I overdo it I feel awful again.

Look after yourself and get as much rest as you can. Rest and sleep and eating whatever I fancied were the only things that got me through. And don't feel guilty if you have to take time off work. You will in all likelihood feel great soon, maybe at 12 weeks but probably by 15 or so. It's your body telling you to take it easy.

upthewolves Sat 03-Jan-15 23:06:04

Letitpea- I am 10 weeks and totally sympathise. I think week 9 was my worst week for sickness, I am still nauseas but I think it is more manageable this week.Like you I have all day nausea and I often wake up nauseas in the night too. I also much longed for this baby and have been feeling guilty because there have been times where I have felt so ill I've wished I wasn't pregnant! I think it will get better when people know because hiding feeling awful is hard.

I've got to go back to work next week too and I'm nervous. If you are really suffering and can't work though, go to your GP and have some time off. I know you are pregnant not ill but I'd you can't function there is no point being there, take care of yourself. We will all get through this!

sleepybee Sat 03-Jan-15 23:47:43

I was diagnosed with hyperemis sickness it was grim. Started to lift about 18 weeks & I only had a little nausea now & occasional vomiting I'm 23 weeks now. It started at 5 weeks & weeks 12-16 the worse! I had a few sick days & my dr prescribed anti sickness meds I was admitted once to hospital for fluids. I'd say just try keep hydrated & eat what you can even, get lots of sleep & rest

Gillian1980 Sun 04-Jan-15 00:16:33

OP, I could have written your post word for word! So sorry you are suffering, I empathise entirely.

I'm struggling with my appetite but basically forcing down small amounts. I'm managing quite a bit of fruit juice and smoothies though which is good.

My DH is trying his best to support me, but every time he says "hopefully only a few more weeks of it" my heart sinks. A few more weeks!!!

Dreading going back to work on Monday sad

AnythingNotEverything Sun 04-Jan-15 00:26:49

Week 9 was my absolute worst week, then at 10 weeks, as of by magic, it all went away. I think my placenta took over.

I know it feels relentless, but hopefully it'll be over soon. I think this is the worst bit of the whole 9 months.

bm1980 Sun 04-Jan-15 07:27:35

This sounds completely normal to me too but like everyone else has said, it does get better! I'm 23 weeks with my second and definitely suffered more this time round up to about 14 weeks but then the icky feelings do just stop! I also have a long train commute to work and my best tips for coping would be, confide in one supportive colleague, maybe some one who have been through it, take lots of little snacks to eat, crackers, nuts and baby bel cheese worked for me, drink sparkling water to stay hydrated and if you can lie down as soon as you get home! Hope you feel better soon.

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