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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

Child birth

32 replies

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 14:16

I'm currently almost 15 weeks pregnant and have been thinking alot about childbirth lately.
Feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing if I'm honest- dont really know what to expect, never seen a birthing video or anything. What did you do to prepare for child birth? Or did you just go with it?

OP posts:

Report

AnythingNotEverything · 19/12/2014 14:19

I found NCT classes very enlightening, as did DH.

Do you have friends who have had babies? You could ask them for honest thoughts.

I've had two babies and am 13 weeks with my third. Honestly, by the time you get there you'd walk over hot coals to not be pregnant any longer, so if you hear anything that sounds awful or scary, do try see it through the eyes of a full term, tired, achey, fed up pregnant woman.

There are good books available too. I'm sure someone will pop by and recommend one ...

bakingtins · 19/12/2014 14:22

NCT or NHS antenatal classes will help you prepare. I found hypnobirthing (used the Natal Hypnotherapy CDs) really helpful. There's a pregnancy relaxation one you can start to use early on, then a birth preparation one for 3rd trimester. I think forewarned is forearmed, in terms of knowing what your options are, but it's good to be flexible about how it goes on the day as it's always a bit of an unknown.

bakingtins · 19/12/2014 14:24

I like the cartoonist Kate Evans' books - one called Bump about pregnancy and birth, and The Food of Love about breastfeeding. V funny but also informative.

Gunpowder · 19/12/2014 14:26

It's not for everyone, but I watched every episode of one born every minute in my last pregnancy and read millions of birth stories and books and it worked for me, I liked being prepared. One of my close friends read nothing/did no antenatal classes/ and was fine too, for balance.

TwoLittleTerrors · 19/12/2014 14:36

Definitely NCT (or NHS) antenatal classes. They should cover all you need to know.

Annbag · 19/12/2014 14:39

As others have said you can book onto free NHS classes. The only thing with these for me was they covered labour a lot and spent about 10 minutes covering c section, which is what happened to me! As about a third of births are c section it'd worth reading about that to as you might not get the birth you expected

All the best with your pregnancy

bluewisteria · 19/12/2014 14:40

Read as many Ina May Gaskin books that you can find, can buy a bundle onAmazon.
Also, do hypnobirthing classes, worth their weight in gold! I wish I had for my first, but only did for my second.
Plus hospital birthing classes which are free.

I'm in two minds about NCT, they can be very friendly and supportive. They can also be very cliquey and judgemental. NCT leaders that I have come across have looked down on pain relief, c-sections and bottle feeding. Whatever your ideal birth is, I don't believe access to information on all the what ifs should be censored in this way. That was just my experience, plenty of people think otherwise. For what it's worth I had 2 natural births and breastfed, but I think others who had c sections or bottle fed were made to feel a litttle like failures, or that it wasn't ideal. Which I thought was fucking rude and obnoxious and unsupportive frankly...

Dontforgetyourbrolly · 19/12/2014 14:47

Hey Gunpowder - snap! I couldn't get enough of One Born Every Minute , I loved watching it so much while I was pregnant. It kind of gave me the attitude of ' well, there's billions of women giving birth right now ' , then I just went with it.

Fwiw I had one of those super easy births, not boasting, but just balancing out the millions of horror stories the OP will hear before the big day. I know everybody took great delight in scaring the hell out of me !

Congrats OP , such an exciting time , I would do it all again if I could x

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:11

Thanks everyone- is there any videos on youtube or anything that anyone would recommend? Of someone giving birth or is that a bad idea?!
When do u start the nhs classes? Do you have to be in 3rd trimester for those? Not hear of hypnobirthing- ill google that now! Is that something my midwife can recommend where the classes for that are?
Thanks everyone, I'm excited but very nervous! My friends don't give me alot of info when I ask them, I suppose every birth is different so I can only prepare so much...

OP posts:

steerpike82 · 19/12/2014 15:13

Hi Finding, I just wanted to say that for every woman with a horror story, there's 2 that haven't had any problems, so please don't be put off too much (Please tell me if im wrong, i don't want to be rude).Also, information is your friend but remember it's always different for everyone. NHS antenatal classes were great.

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:15

I just cannot imagine a contraction! Do women really scream alot like the ones on One Born every minute? Or are those ladies on tv as they make more interesting watching?!

OP posts:

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:16

Definitely will go to nhs antenatal classes- how many do you get to go to? I'm seeing midwife on 30th so I can ask her I suppose. I really need to start some classes so I can meet other pregnant ladies and share my worries!

OP posts:

bluewisteria · 19/12/2014 15:17

There is a uk hypnobirthing website that will find someone registered near you.
I wasn't convinced before I did the classes- they are expensive and a bit hippy dippy whale music. But I was v honest with the teacher and said I couldn't listen to that kind of music and also cut out chunks of 'the script'.
What was amazing about it was that my husband really had a role and knew what to do and made a huge difference to my state. Whilst in the first birth he didn't really know what to do.

bluewisteria · 19/12/2014 15:19

I think a lot if screaming is fear related, as fear makes pain a zillion times worse. That's why I think hypnobirthing is amazing as it teaches you to welcome contractions, not to be afraid if it and keeps pain and fear to a minimum.

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:22

Thank you wisteria- so when hypno birthing is that when you listen to specific music whilst in labour etc?

OP posts:

BathTangle · 19/12/2014 15:30

Get a copy of What to expect when you are expecting - you can probably get it from the library if you don't want to buy it.

For a bit of light relief, get The Best Friend's Guide to Pregnancy which is a more personal and less medical book.

Watch One Born to see a variety of approaches and types of birth.

And congratulations!!

BathTangle · 19/12/2014 15:31

And spend lots of time lurking on here, and ask any questions you like!!

bluewisteria · 19/12/2014 15:32

You can do but it is more about creating cues and affirmation to calm you and to relax.
Try YouTube, I'm sure there are hypnobirthing births and also lessons I'm it.
But I would do it with a practitioner further down the line.
There might be a hypnobirthing section on mumsnet not sure x

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:32

Okay thankyou- ill order the book now :) I'm just about to watch a youtube episode of one born! Haven't watched this for a few years!

OP posts:

AnythingNotEverything · 19/12/2014 15:53

OP there's a lovely bunch of us ladies due in June over on the antenatal thread. Come join Us and we can worry about this stuff together

Findingthisdifficult1234 · 19/12/2014 15:58

Ah thankyou :) I will look for the thread! X

OP posts:

prettywhiteguitar · 19/12/2014 16:41

I certainly made pain noises with labour, I didn't scream I kind of made other noises ! I does help with the pain.

Screaming is just another way of letting it out, but I don't think that it's a positive way. Anyway you will be in a fog / zone and you might not consciously know what sounds are coming out !

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TwoLittleTerrors · 19/12/2014 16:44

If you want to watch videos, then one born every minute is as good as any. But tbh every birth is different and I'm not sure how well they prepare you? But maybe you want to see the more visual side of it? The antenatal classes will cover more on how to cope with labour (which hypnobirthing would too).

I am another with incredibly easy labour. Easy as in relatively pain free. The first was traumatic as it went on for 3 days and no one believed I was in active labour. As a result I didn't get any care and was left. With my second, I had a consultant note for silent labour so was allowed into the MLU as soon as labour started. It was less than 3 hours from first contraction to birth and 2-3 puffs of gas and air only at transition. Just keep an open mind that not everyone suffers from a lot of pain from it.

TwoLittleTerrors · 19/12/2014 16:45

prettywhiteguitar I didn't get zone out either. I was very very consious and with it for both my labours. I'm fairly sure it's not a essential element of labour, unlike contractions and water going!

prettywhiteguitar · 19/12/2014 16:50

Yes I think everybody is totally different, I totally zone out and go into myself.

I think it helps to accept that you will deal with it in your own way based upon what happens at the time. You have no idea no matter how many dc you have what kind of labour you will have.

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