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pregnant and scared

(3 Posts)
hanabb Thu 04-Dec-14 21:12:47


I am new to this site smile

I have a 4 year old child already and found out today I am pregnant again. Although this baby is planned I can't help but feel overwhelmed and petrified.

I know i should feel overjoyed and I never felt like this the first time. I feel silly as this is what I want and these emotions I am feeling very confused.

Also my sister had had a miscarriage earlier in the year and is now struggling to get pregnant again as she and her husband have health issues. I have no idea how I am going to tell her and feel as though I am going to break her heart.

Any advise would be appreciated. Tia xxx

MistressKatherine Thu 04-Dec-14 21:38:27

Hi Hana, you're not alone! Mine was planned and I spent the first two weeks scared to death thinking I had done the wrong thing even though I had really wanted this. I have no idea why. Hormones? I get it occasionally now but mostly it has gone and I feel very happy. Please don't worry. Cut yourself some slack and try to relax.

I'm sorry to hear about your sister. How awful for her. Why not wait until you feel comfortable and tell her when you are ready. I'm sure she will be thrilled for you and be very supportive. After all, you being pregnant doesn't mean she can't be again. Just be sensitive to her and tell her your worries. Even if she is a little upset, it's not because of you and in time she will be ok with your news. Big hugs x

thejoysofboys Thu 04-Dec-14 21:55:29

There's an 18m gap between my two. DS1 was and IVF baby and DS2 was a massive surprise!!!! I was petrified when I found out I was pg. I panicked for a LONG time.

I think second time round you understand how tough it is to have a newborn (DS1 was a high maintenance baby) and you can't quite get your head round how you can look after another tiny baby AND an older child too. The baby stage is hard work (IMO) and even though I did want another child I was terrified of having to go through all that again.

It's very early days for you. Give yourself a break and just go with it. I found I still had moments of "OMG!!! what have I done/!?!?" up until DS2's birth then I just relaxed and got on with it.

Really sorry to hear about your sister. As someone who went through infertility and IVF I know how hard it can be to hear pregnancy news when you want that for yourself more than anything. However, I would NEVER have wanted my friends or family to feel they couldn't share pregnancy stuff with me because of my situation. Just tell your sister when you feel ready and let her know it's OK for her to be a bit upset/off at times. Don't ram pregnancy stuff down her throat but take her lead and share stuff with her if she asks. That's all you can do.

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