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Inlaws driving me insane!

(10 Posts)
Becca1818 Sat 08-Nov-14 17:34:40

My oh's parents are doing my head in. They keep buying second hand stuff for the baby that I don't even want. They don't even ask if it's stuff I want or need it's driving me mad. At the rate they are going they will have a fully kitted out nursery before I do. I really don't know what to do.

LegoCaltrops Sat 08-Nov-14 17:37:53

Have you discussed this with them / your OH, do they know how you feel? This could be 1) innocent overexcitement on their part, or 2) intrusive & manipulative.

Rkbump Sat 08-Nov-14 17:46:37

Oh dear, how far are you along! Maybe you could slow them down by sayingnitsnall too early and it's scaring you or something? I think it possibly is over excitement! Or at least I hope it is x

Becca1818 Sat 08-Nov-14 17:48:03

They have been told several times to back off by my oh and his brother. I know they are excited but it really is ruining things for me. This is my first pregnancy and I feel like they are stealing my thunder. If we say anything she gets upsets.

Jodie1982 Sat 08-Nov-14 18:19:26

Just tell em you don't need anything bought, or say you've already bought one, that's what I've been saying to friends that have been offering me 2nd hand stuff, if I take it just to b kind it'll just clutter my house up.

Becca1818 Sat 08-Nov-14 19:16:22

Jodie all they will say to that is they will just keep it at their house. As I say they will end up with a better equipped nursery than I will!

PurpleCrazyHorse Sat 08-Nov-14 21:06:50

Try not to worry about it. Even if they do have a massively kitted out nursery, it doesn't really matter if your baby doesn't regularly stay there. They are probably just excited, my PIL did exactly the same. They have literally tonnes of Brio and Duplo, swing seats, playmats, way more than we have, but it only gets used occasionally when we visit or when they look after DD. It does have advantages as we don't need to cart loads of kit to their house. Ultimately we have DD, which is the key thing grin. PIL are absolutely lovely though, just MIL got very excited with her first grandchild and is repeating with the 2nd (SIL just had a baby). It did feel a bit like PIL were also having a baby!

However, you have the 'prize' and the 'thunder' will be all yours when you have your baby. You'll have the baby in your nursery, with your things, they'll have all the stuff they bought but no baby. I don't mean that in a nasty way to your PIL, but sometimes it's helpful to remember that when your baby's born, it will most likely matter less to you. It certainly did to me.

If they offer you stuff, don't take anything you don't want, just say you've seen the exact one you want that matches the nursery decor/fits just right in the space/recommended by your best friend.

Unfortunately you can't stop them spending their money. I found the best bet was a smile sweetly and take a deep breath. Ultimately if they're just excited then it's not worth falling out with them over it as they could be very useful babysitters in the future.

WhyOWhyWouldYou Sat 08-Nov-14 21:07:39

Let them end up with loads of stuff at their place. It doesn't matter, you'll still be choosing baby's "proper" things for your place.

upduffedsecret Sat 08-Nov-14 21:15:56

shame most of it will go to waste then... still, they can always sell it on

DesperatelySeekingSanity Sat 08-Nov-14 21:18:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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